Diffembler carried this on with the utmoft Addrefs; and if any fufpected his Affairs were narrow, it was attributed to indulging himself in. fome fashionable Vice rather than an irreproachable Poverty, which faved his Credit with thofe on whom he depended.

THE main Art is to be as little troublesome as you can, and make all you hope for come rather as a Favour from your Patron than Claim from you. But I am here prating of what is the Method of pleafing fo as to fucceed in the World, when there are Crowds who have, in City, Town, Court, and Country, arrived at confiderable Acquifitions, and yet feem incapable of acting in any conftant Tenour of Life, but have gone on from one fuccefsful Error to another: Therefore I think I may fhorten this Enquiry after the Method of Pleafing; and as the old Beau faid to his Son, once for all, Pray Jack be a fine Gentleman, fo may I to my Reader abridge my Inftructions, and finish the Art of Pleafing, in a Word, Be rich.

T

No. 281. Tuesday, January 22.

Pectoribus inhians fpirantia confulit exta.

H

Virg.

AVING already given an Account of the Diffection of a Beau's Head, with the feveral Difcoveries made on that Occafion; I fhall here, according to my Promife, enter upon the Diffection of a Coquet's Heart, and communicate to the Publick fuch Particularities as we observed in that curious Piece of Anatomy.

I fhould perhaps have waved this Undertaking, had not I been put in mind of my Promife by several of my unknown Correfpondents, who are very importunate with me to make an Example of the Coquet, as I have already done of the Beau. It is therefore in Compliance with the Request of Friends, that I have looked over the Minutes of my former Dream, in order to give the Publick an exact Relation of it, which I fhall enter upon without further Preface.

ተ

OUR Operator, before he engaged in this Vifionary Diffection, told us, that there was nothing in his Art more difficult, than to lay open the Heart of a Coquet, by Reafon of the many Labyrinths and Receffes which are to be found in it, and which do not appear in the Heart of any other Animal.

He defired us first of all to obferve the Pericardium, or outward Cafe of the Heart, which we did very attentively; and by the Help of our Glaffes difcern'd in it Millions of little Scars, which feem'd to have been occafioned by the Points of innumerable Darts and Arrows, that from Time to Time had glanced upon the outward Coat; though we could not difcover the fmalleft Orifice, by which any of them had entred and pierced the inward Substance.

EVERY Smatterer in Anatomy knows, that this Pericardium, or Cafe of the Heart, contains in it a thin reddifh Liquor, fupposed to be bred from the Vapours which exhale out of the Heart, and being stopt here, are condenfed into this watry Subftance. Upon examining this Liquor, we found that it had in it all the Qualities of that Spirit which is made ufe of in the Thermometer, to fhew the Change of Weather.

NOR muft I here omit an Experiment one of the Company affured us he himself had made with this Liquor, which he found in great Quantity about the Heart of a Coquet whom he had formerly diffected. He affirmed to us, that he had actually enclosed it in a fmall Tube made after the Manner of a Weather-Glafs; but that inftead of acquainting him with the Variations of the Atmofphere, it fhewed him the Qualities of thofe Perfons who entered the Room where it ftood. He affirmed alfo, that it rofe at the Approach of a Plume of Feathers, an embroidered Coat, or a Pair of fringed Gloves; and that it fell as foon as an ill shaped Perriwig, a clumfie Pair of Shoes, or an unfashionable Coat came into his House: Nay, he proceeded fo far as to affure us, that upon his laughing aloud when he stood by it, the Liquor mounted very fenfibly, and immediately funk again upon his looking ferious. In fhort, he told us, that he knew very well by this Invention whenever he had a Man of Senfe or a Coxcomb in his Room.

HAVING cleared away the Pericardium, or the Cafe and Liquor above-mentioned, we came to the Heart it felf. The outward Surface of it was extremely flippery, and the Mucro, or Point, fo very cold withal, that upon endeavouring to take hold of it, it glided through the Fingers like a fmooth Piece of Ice.

THE Fibres were turned and twisted in a more intricate and perplexed Manner than they are ufually found in other Hearts; infomuch that the whole Heart was wound up together like a Gordian Knot, and must have had very irregular and unequal Motions, whilft it was employed in its vital Function.

ONE Thing we thought very obfervable, namely, that upon examining all the Veffels which came into it or if fued out of it, we could not discover any Communication that it had with the Tongue.

WE could not but take Notice likewife, that feveral of those little Nerves in the Heart which are affected by the Sentiments of Love, Hatred, and other Paffions, did not defcend to this before us from the Brain, but from the Muscles which lie about the Eye.

UPON weighing the Heart in my Hand, I found it to be extremely light, and confequently very hollow; which I did not wonder at, when upon looking into the infide of it, I faw Multitudes of Cells and Cavities running one within another, as our Hiftorians defcribe the Apartments of Rofamond's Bower. Several of thefe little Hollows were stuffed with innumerable Sorts of Trifles, which I fhall forbear giving any particular Account of, and fhall therefore only take Notice of what lay firft and uppermoft, which upon our unfolding it, and applying our Microscopes to it, appeared to be a Flame-coloured Hood.

WE were informed that the Lady of this Heart, when living, received the Addresses of several who made Love to her, and did not only give each of them Encouragement, but made every one the converfed with believe that she regarded him with an Eye of Kindnefs; for which Reason we expected to have seen the Impreffion of Multitudes of Faces among the feveral Plaits and Foldings of the Heart, but to our great Surprize not a fingle Print of

this

very

this Nature difcovered itself till we came into the Core and Center of it. We there obferved a little Figure, which, upon applying our Glaffes to it, appeared dreffed in a very fantastick Manner. The more I looked upon it, the more I thought I had feen the Face before, but could not poffibly recollect either the Place or Time; when at length one of the Company, who had examined this Figure more nicely than the reft, fhew'd us plainly by the Make of its Face, and the feveral Turns of its Features, that the little Idol which was thus lodged in the very Middle of the Heart was the deceafed Beau, whofe Head I gave fome Account of in my last Tuesday's Paper.

As foon as we had finished our Diffection, we refolved to make an Experiment of the Heart, not being able to determine among ourfelves the Naturè of its Substance, which differ'd in fo many Particulars from that of the Heart in other Females. Accordingly we laid it into a Pan of burning Coals, when we observed in it a certain Salamandrine Quality, that made it capable of living in the Midft of Fire and Flame, without being confumed, or fo much as finged.

As we were admiring this ftrange Phænomenon, and ftanding round the Heart in a Circle, it gave a moft prodigious Sigh or rather Crack, and difperfed all at once in Smoke and Vapour. This imaginary Noife, which methought was louder than the Burst of a Cannon, produced fuch a violent Shake in my Brain, that it diffipated the Fumes of Sleep, and left me in an Inftant broad awake.

L

No. 282. Wednesday, January 23.

IT

Spes incerta futuri.

Virg.

T is a lamentable Thing that every Man is full of Complaints, and conftantly uttering Sentences against the Fickleness of Fortune, when People generally bring upon themselves all the Calamities they fall into, and are conftantly heaping up Matter for their own Sorrow and Difappointment. That which produces the greatest Part of the Delufions of Mankind, is a falfe Hope which People indulge with fo fanguine a Flattery to themselves, that their Hearts are bent upon fantastical Advantages which they had no Reafon to believe should ever have arrived to them. By this unjuft Measure of calculating their Happiness, they often mourn with real Affliction for imaginary Loffes. When I am talking of this unhappy Way of accounting for ourfelves, I cannot but reflect upon a particular Set of People, who in their own Fa vour refolve every Thing that is poffible into what is probable, and then reckon upon that Probability as on what muft certainly happen. WILL. HONEYCOMB, upon my obferving his looking on a Lady with fome particular Attention, gave me an Account of the great Diftreffes which had laid waste that her very fine Face, and given an Air of Melancholy to a very agreeable Perfon. That Lady, and a Couple of Sifters of hers, were, faid WILL, fourteen Years ago, the greatest Fortunes about Town ; but without having any Lofs by bad Tenants, by bad Securities, or any Damage by Sea or Land, are reduced to very narrow Circumstances. They were at that Time the most inacceffible haughty Beauties in Town; and their Pretenfions to take upon them at that unmerciful Rate, was rais'd upon the following Scheme, according to which all their Lovers were answered.

OUR Father is a youngish Man, but then ourMother is fomewhat older, and not likely to have any ChilVOL. IV. dren:

F