S. Dro. Because it is a bleffing that he beftows on beafts; and what he hath fcanted men in hair, he hath given them in wit.

Ant. Why, but there's many a man hath more hair than wit.

S. Dro. Not a man of those, but he hath the wit to lofe his hair.

Ant. Why, thou didst conclude hairy men plaindealers without wit.

S. Dro. The plainer dealer, the fooner loft; yet he lofeth it in a kind of jollity.

Ant. For what reafon ?

S. Dro. For two, and found ones too.
Ant. Nay, not found, I pray you.
S. Dro. Sure ones then.

Ant. Nay, not fure in a thing falfing.
S. Dro. Certain ones then.

Ant, Name them.

S. Dro. The one to fave the money that he fpends in tyring; the other, that at dinner they should not drop in his porridge.

Ant. You would all this time have prov'd, there is no time for all things.

S. Dro. Marry, and did, Sir; namely no time to recover hair loft by nature.

Ant. But your reason was not fubftantial, why there is no time to recover.

S. Dro Thus I mend it: Time himself is bald, and therefore to the world's end will have bald followers. Ant. I knew, 'twould be a bald conclufion: but foft! who wafts us yonder?

Enter Adriana, and Luciana.

Adri. Ay, ay, Antipholis, look ftrange and frown, Some other miftrefs hath thy fweet aspects:

is mock reafoning, and a contradiction in fenfe. Can hair be fuppos'd a bleffing, which Time beftows on beafts peculiarly; and yet that he hath fcanted them of it too? I corrected this paffage, as I have now reform'd the text, in my SHAKESPEARE reflor'd; and Mr. Pope has been pleas'd to adopt my correction in his laft edition. Men and Them, I obferve, are very frequently mistaken vice versa for each other, in the old imprefficas of our Author.

I am not Adriana, nor thy wife.

The time was once, when thou, unurg'd, wouldft vow,
That never words were mufick to thine ear,

That never object pleafing in thine eye,
That never touch well welcome to thy hand,
That never meat sweet-favour'd in thy tafte,

Unless I fpake, or look'd, or touch'd, or carv'd.
How comes it now, my husband, oh, how comes it,,
That thou art thus eftranged from thyfelf?
Thyfelf I call it, being ftrange to me:
That, undividable, incorporate,

Am better than thy dear felf's better part.
Ah, do not tear away thyself from me :
For know, my love, as eafy may'st thou fall
A drop of water in the breaking gulph,
And take unmingled thence that drop again,
Without addition or diminishing,

As take from me thyself; and not me too.
How dearly would it touch thee to the quick,
Should't thou but hear, I were licentious?
And that this body, confecrate to thee,
By ruffian luft fhould be contaminate?
Would'st thou not fpit at me, and fpurn at me,
And hurl the name of hufband in my face,
And tear the ftain'd skin of my harlot-brow,
And from my falfe hand cut the wedding-ring,
And break it with a deep-divorcing vow?

I know thou can'ft; and therefore, fee, thou do it..
I am poffefs'd with an adulterate blot;

My blood' is mingled with the crime of luft:

For if we two be one, and thou play falfe,
I do digeft the poifon of thy flesh,

Being ftrumpeted by thy contagion.

Keep then fair league, and truce with thy true bed; I live dif-ftain'd, thou undishonoured. (7)

(7) I live diftain'd, thou undishonoured.] To diffaine. (from the French word, deftaindre) fignifies, to fain, defile, pollute.. But the cor text requires a fenfe quite oppofite. We must either read, unstain'd; or, by adding an bypben, and giving the prepofition a privatins force read dif-ftain'd, and then it will mean, unstain'd, undefiled. Ant.

Ant. Plead you to me, fair dame? I know you not: In Ephefus I am but two hours old,

As ftrange unto your town as to your talk.
Who, every word by all my wit being fcann'd,
Wants wit in all one word to understand.

Luc. Fy, brother, how the world is chang'd with yous. When were you wont to use my fifter thus ?

She fent for you by Dromia home to dinner.

Ant. By Dromio ?

S. Dro. By me?

Adr. By thee; and thus thou didst return from him, That he did buffet thee, and in his blows

Deny'd my houfe for his, me for his wife.

Ant. Did you converfe, Sir, with this gentlewoman What is the courfe and drift of your compact?

S. Dro. I, Sir? I never faw her 'till this time. Ant. Villain, thou lieft; for even her very words Didft thou deliver to me on the mart.

S. Dro. I never spoke with her in all my life.
Ant. How can fhe thus then call us by our names,
Unless it be by inspiration?

Adr. How ill agrees it with your gravity,
To counterfeit thus grofly with your flave,
Abetting him to thwart me in my mood ?
Be it my wrong, you are from me exempt,
But wrong not that wrong with a more contempt.
Come, I will faften on this fleeve of thine;
Thou art an elm, my hufband, I a vine;
Whofe weaknefs, marry'd to thy ftronger ftate,
Makes me with thy ftrength to communicate;
If ought poffefs thee from me, it is drofs,
Ufurping ivy, brier, or idle mofs;

Who, all for want of pruning, with intrufion
Infect thy fap, and live on thy confusion.

Ant. To me the fpeaks; the moves me for her theam
What was I marry'd to her in my dream?
Or fleep I now, and think I hear all this?
What error drives our eyes and ears amifs ?
Until I know this fure uncertainty,
I'll entertain the favour'd fallacy,

Luc

Luc. Dromio, go bid the fervants fpread for dinner.
S. Dro. Oh, for my beads! I crofs me for a finner.
This is the Fairy land: oh, fpight of spights!
We talk with goblins, ouphs, and elvish sprights; (8)
If we obey them not, this will enfue,

They'll fuck our breath, and pinch us black and blue.
Luc. Why prates thou to thyfelf, and anfwer'ft not? (9)
Dromio, thou drone, thou fnail, thou flug, thou fot.
S. Dro. I am transformed, mafter, am not I?
Ant. I think, thou art in mind, and fo am I.

S. Dro. Nay, mafter, both in mind and in my shape.
Ant. Thou haft thine own form.

S. Dro. No; I am an ape.

Luc. If thou art chang'd to ought, 'tis to an afs.
S. Dro. 'Tis true; fhe rides me, and I long for grafs.
'Tis fo, I am an afs; else it could never be,
But I fhould know her, as well as he knows me.

Adr. Come, come, no longer will I be a fool,
To put the finger in the eye and weep,
Whilft man and mafter laugh my woes to fcorn.
Come, Sir, to dinner; Dromio, keep the gate;
Hufband, I'll dine above with you to-day,
And fhrive you of a thousand idle pranks;

(8) We talk with goblins, owls, and elvish Sprights;] They might fancy, they talk'd with goblins and fprights; but why with owls, in the name of nonfenfe? or could owls fuck their breath, and pinch them black and blue? I dare fay, my readers will acquiefce in the juftness of my emendation here: the word is common with our author in other paffages:

Merry Wives of Windfor.

Strew good luck, ouphs, on ev'ry facred room. And, again;

Like urchins, ouphs, and fairies, green and white. (9) Why prat ft thou to thyself?

Dromio, thou Dromio, fnail, thou flug, thou fot,] In the first of thefe lines Mr. Rowe and Mr. Po e have both, for what reafon I cannot tell, curtail'd the measure, and difmounted the doggrel rhyme, which I have replac'd from the first folio. The fecond verfe is there likewife read;

Dromio, thou Dremio, thou fnail, thou flug, thou fot. The verfe is thus half a foot too long; my correction cures that fault: besides drone correfponds with the other appellations of reproach.

Sirrah,

1

Sirrah, if any afk you for your master,
Say, he dines forth, and let no creature enter:
Come, fifter; Dromio, play the porter well.

Ant. Am I in earth, in heaven, or in hell?
Sleeping or waking, mad or well advis'd?
Known unto thefe, and to myfelf disguis'd?
I'll fay as they fay, and perfever fo;
And in this mift at all adventures go.

S. Dro. Mafter, fhall I be porter at the gate?
Adr. Ay, let none enter, left I break your pate.
Luc. Come, come, Antipholis, we dine too late.
[Exeunt

16066666666666

A C T III.

SCENE, the Street before Antipholis's Houfe..

Enter Antipholis of Ephefus, Dromio of Ephefus, Angelo, and Balthazar.

E. ANTIPHOL IS.

OOD Signior Angelo, you muft excufe us;
My wife is fhrewith, when I keep not hours;

Go

Say, that I linger'd with you at your shop
To f the making of her carkanet;

And that to-morrow you will bring it home.
But here's a villain, that would face me down
He met me on the mart, and that I beat him
And charg'd him with a thousand marks in gold;
And that I did deny my wife and house:
Thou drunkard, thou, what didft thou mean by this?
E. Dro. Say, what you will, Sir; but I know what
I know;

That you beat me at the mart, I have your hand to show;
If the fkin were parchment, and the blows you gave

were ink,

Your own hand-writing would tell you what I think..

E. Ant.