me

-Must not a man be a vain coxcomb now, to

think this creature followed one?

Sir Cha. Nothing so plain, my lord.

L. Fop. Flattering devil!

Enter Lady BETTY.

L. Betty. Pshaw, my Lord Foppington! pr'ythee don't play the fool now, but give me my snuff-box— Sir Charles, help me to take it from him.

Sir Cha. You know I hate trouble, madam.

L. Betty. Pooh! you'll make me stay till prayers are half over now.

L. Fop. If you'll promise me not to go to church, I'll give it you.

L. Betty. I'll promise nothing at all; for positively I will have it. [Struggling with him. L. Fop. Then, comparatively, I won't part with it. Ha, ha! [Struggles with her. L. Betty. Oh, you devil, you have killed my arm ! -Well, if you'll let me have it, I'll give you a

Oh l better.

L. Mor. Oh, Charles that has a view of distant kindness in it. [Aside to Sir Charles. L. Fop. Nay, now I keep it superlatively-I find there's a secret value in it. L. Betty. Oh, dismal! Upon my word, I am only ashamed to give it to you. fer such an odious fancied

the least value for ?

Do you think I would ofthing to any body I had

Sir Cha. Now it comes a little nearer, methinks it does not seem to be any kindness at all.

[Aside to Lord Morelove.

L. Fop. Why, really, madam, upon second view, it has not extremely the mode of a lady's utensil. Are you sure it never held any thing but snuff?

L. Betty. Oh, you monster!

L. Fop. Nay, I only ask, because it seems to me to have very much the air and fancy of Monsieur Smoakandsot's tobacco-box,

L. Mor. I can bear no more.

Sir Cha. Why, don't, then; I'll step in to the company, and return to your relief immediately.

[Exit.

L. Mor. [To Lady Bet.] Come, madam, will your ladyship give me leave to end the difference? Since the slightness of the thing may let you bestow it without any mark of favour, shall I beg it of your ladyship.

L. Bet. Oh, my lord, nobody sooner -I beg you give it, my lord. [Looking earnestly on Lord Fop. who, smiling, gives it to Lord Mor. and then bows gravely to her]

L. Mor. Only to have the honour of restoring it to your lordship; and if there be any other trifle of mine your lordship has a fancy to, tho' it were a mistress, I don't know any person in the world that has so good a claim to my resignation.

L. Fop. Oh, my lord, this generosity will distract

me!

L. Mor. My lord, I do you but common justice.

A& III. But from your conversation, I had never known the true value of the sex. You positively understand them the best of any man breathing; therefore I think every one of common prudence ought to resign to you.

L. Fop. Then, positively, your lordship is the most obliging person in the world; for I'm sure your judgment can never like any woman that is not the finest creature in the universe. [Bowing to Lady Betty.

L. Mor. Oh, your lordship does me too much honour! I have the worst judgment in the world; no man has been more deceived in it.

L. Fop. Then your lordship, I presume, has been apt to choose in a mask, or by candle-light.

L. Mor. In a mask, indeed, my lord, and of all masks the most dangerous.

L. Fop. Pray, what's that, my lord ?

L. Mor. A bare face.

L. Fop. Your lordship will pardon me, if I don't so readily comprehend how a woman's bare face can hide her face.

L. Mor. It often hides her heart, my lord; and therefore I think it sometimes a more dangerous mask than a piece of velvet: that's rather a mark than a disguise of an ill woman. But the mischiefs skulking behind a beauteous form give no warning; they are always sure, fatal, and innumerable.

L. Betty. Oh, barbarous aspersion! My lord Foppington, have you nothing to say for the poor wo

men?

L. Fop. I must confess, madam, nothing of this nature ever happened in my course of amours. I always judge the beauteous part of a woman to be the most agreeable part of her composition; and when once a lady does me the honour to toss that into my arms, I think myself obliged, in good nature, not to quarrel about the rest of her equipage.

L. Betty. Why, ay, my lord, there's some good humour in that now.

L. Mor. He's happy in a plain English stomach, madam ; I could recommend a dish that's perfectly to your lordship's goût, where beauty is the only sauce to it.

L. Betty. So

L. Fop. My lord, when my wine's right, I never care it should be zested.

L. Mor. I know some ladies would thank you for that opinion.

L. Betty. My Lord Morelove is really grown such a churl to the women, I don't only think he is not, but cann't conceive how he ever could be, in love. L. Mor. Upon my word, madam, I once thought I [Smiling.

was.

L. Betty. Fie, fie! how could you think so? I fancy now you had only a mind to domineer over some poor creature, and so you thought you were in love, ha, ha!

L. Mor. The lady I loved, madam, grew so unfortunate in her conduct, that at last she brought me to

G

treat her with the same indifference and civility as I now pay your ladyship.

L. Betty. And, ten to one, just at that time she never thought you such tolerable company.

L. Mor. That I cann't say, madam; for at that time she grew so affected, there was no judging of her thoughts at all. [Mimicking her. L. Betty. What, and so you left the poor lady. Oh, inconstant creature!

you

L. Mor. No, madam, to have loved her on had been inconstancy; for she was never two hours together the same woman.

[Lady Bet. and Lord Mor. seem to talk. L. Fop. [Aside.] Ha, ha, ha! I see he has a mind to abuse her; so I'll even give him an opportunity of doing his business with her at once for ever-My lord, I perceive your lordship is going to be good company to the lady; and, for her sake, I don't think it good manners in me to disturb you

Enter Sir CHARLES.

Sir Cha. My Lord Foppington

L. Fop. Oh, Charles I was just wanting theeHark thee-I have three thousand secrets for theeI have made such discoveries! to tell thee all in one word, Morelove's as jealous of me as the devil, he, he, he!

Sir Cha. Is it possible? Has she given him any oc

casion ?

L. Fop. Only rallied him to death upon my account;

2