. X we are offended with the Sun's heat, and those cool blasts, because we buy them not." This air we breathe is so common, we care not for it; nothing pleaseth but what is dear. And if we be witty in any thing, it is ad gulam: If we study at all, it is erudito luxu, to please the palat, and to satisfie the gut. "A Cook of old was a base knave (as 'Livy complains), but now a great man in request: Cookery is become an art, a noble science: Cooks are Gentlemen:" Venter Deus: They wear "their brains in their bellies, and their guts in their heads;" as Agrippa taxed some parasites of his time, rushing on their own destruction, as if a man should run upon the point of a sword, usque dum rumpantur comedunt: All day, all night, let the Physitian say what he will, imminent danger, and feral diseases are now ready to seize upon them, that will eat till they vomit, Edunt ut vomant, vomunt ut edant, saith Seneca: which Dion relates of Vitellius, Solo transitu ciborum nutriri judicatus: His meat did pass through, and away; or till they burst again. "Strage animantium ventrem onerant, and rake over all the world, as so many slaves, belly-gods, and land-serpents, Et totus orbis ventri nimis angustus, the whole world cannot satisfie their appetite. "Sea, Land, Rivers, Lakes, &c. may not give content to their raging guts." To make up the mess, what immoderate drinking in every place? Senem potum pota trahebat anus, how they flock to the Tavern: as if they were fruges consumere nati, born to no other end but to eat and drink, like Offellius Bibulus, that famous Roman parasite, Qui dum vixit, aut bibit aut minxit; as so many Casks to hold wine, yea worse than a Cask, that marrs wines, and itself is not marred by it, yet these are brave men, Silenus Ebrius was no braver. Et que fuerunt vitia, mores sunt: 'tis now the fashion of our times, an honour: Nunc verò res ista eò rediit (as Chrysost. serm. 30. in 5. Ephes. comments) Ut effeminate ridendæque ignavia loco habeatur, nolle inebriari;) 'tis now come to that pass, that hee is no Gentleman, a very milk-sop, a clown, of no bringing up, that will not drink, fit for no company; he is your onely gallant that playes it off finest, no disparagement now to stagger in the streets, reel, rave, &c. but much to his fame and renown; as in like case Epidicus told Thesprio his fellow servant, in the Poet. Edipol facinus improbum, Ingeniosi ad Gulam. 'Olim vile mancipium, nunc in omni æstimatione, nunc ars haberi cæpta, &c. Epist. 28. 1.7. quorum in ventre ingenium, in patinis, &c. In lucem cœnat. Sertorius. u Seneca. - Mancipia gulæ, dapes non sapore sed sumptu æstimantes. Seneca consol. ad Helvidium. > Sævientia guttura satiare non possunt fluvii & maria, Æneas Sylvius de miser. curial. • Plautus. one urged, the other replied, At jam alii fecere idem, erit illi illa res honori, 'tis now no fault, there be so many brave examples to bear one out; 'tis a credit to have a strong brain, and carry his liquor well: the sole contention who can drink most, and fox his fellow the soonest. 'Tis the summum bonum of our Tradesmen, their felicity, life and soul, Tanta dulcedine affectant, saith Pliny, lib. 14. cap. 12. Ut magna pars non aliud vitæ præmium intelligat, their chief comfort, to be merry together in an Alehouse or Tavern, as our modern Muscovites do in their Mede-Inns, and Turks in their Coffahouses, which much resemble our Taverns; they will labor hard all day long to be drunk at night, and spend totius anni labores, as St. Ambrose addes, in a tipling feast; convert day into night, as Seneca taxeth some in his times, Pervertunt officia noctis & lucis; when we rise, they commonly go to bed, like our Antipodes, Nosque ubi primus equis oriens afflavit anhelis, So did Petronius in Tacitus, Heliogabalus in Lampridius, Mane, diem totum stertebat. Snymdiris the Sybarite never saw the Sun rise or set, so much as once in twenty yeers. Verres, against whom Tully so much enveighs, in Winter he never was extra tectum, vix extra lectum, never almost out of bed, still wenching and drinking; so did he spend his time, and so do Myriads in our days. They have gymnasia bibonum, schools and rendezvous; these Centaures and Lapithæ, toss pots, and bowls, as so many balls, invent new tricks, as Salsages, Anchoves, Tobacco, Caveare, pickled Oysters, Herrings, Fumadoes, &c. innumerable saltmeats to increase their appetite, and study how to hurt themselves by taking Antidotes, "to carry their drink the better: dand when naught else serves, they will go forth, or be conveyed out to empty their goreg, that they may return to drink afresh." They make laws, insanas leges, contra bibendi fallacias, and brag of it when they have done, crowning that man that is soonest gone, as their drunken predecessors have done, quid ego video? Ps. Cum coroná Pseudolum abrium tuum And when they are dead, will have a C • Hor. b Diei brevitas conviviis, noctis longitudo stupris conterebratur. Et quo plus capiant, irritamenta excogitantur. vivium reportentur, repleri ut exhauriant, & • Ingentia vasa velut ad ostentationem, &c. 4 Fores portantur ut ad conexhauriri ut bibant. Ambros. f Plautus: Can Can of Wine with Maron's old woman to be engraven on their tombs. So they triumph in villany, and justifie their wickedness; with Rablais that French Lucian, drunkenness is better for the body then Physick, because there be more old drunkards, then old Physitians. Many such frothy arguments they have, inviting and encouraging others to do as they do, and love them dearly for it (no glew like to that of good fellowship). So did Alcibiades in Greece, Nero, Bonosus, Heliogabalus in Rome, or Alegabalus rather, as he was stiled of old, (as Ignatius proves out of some old Coyns.) So do many great men still, as Heresbachius observes. When a Prince drinks till his eyes stare, like Bitias in the Poet, "(ille impiger hausit Spumantem vino pateram)" m and comes off cleerly, sound Trumpets, Fife and Drums, the spectators will applaud him, "the Bishop himself (if he belie them not) with his Chaplain will stand by and do as much," O dignum principe haustum, 'twas done like a Prince. "Our Dutchmen invite all comers with a pail and a dish," Velut infundibula integras obbas exhauriunt, & in monstrosis poculis, ipsi monstrosi monstrosius epotant, "making barrels of their bellies." Incredibile dictu, as "one of their own countrymen complains: Quantum liquoris immodestissima gens capiat, &c. "How they love a man that will be drunk, crown him and honor him for it," hate him that will not pledg him, stab him, kill him: A most intolerable offence, and not to be forgiven. "He is a mortal enemy that will not drink with him," as Munster relates of the Saxons. So in Poland, he is the best servitor, and the honestest fellow, saith Alexander Gaguinus, "That drinketh most healths to the honour of his master, he shall be rewarded as a good servant, and held the bravest fellow that carries his liquor best, when as a Brewer's horse will bear much more then any sturdy drinker, yet for his noble exploits, in this kinde, he shall be accounted a most valiant man, for Tam inter epulas fortis vir esse Virg. i Notis ad m Idem * Lib. 3. Anthol. c. 20. h Gratiam conciliant potando. Cæsares. * Lib. de educandis principum liberis. strenui potatoris Episcopi Sacellanus, cum ingentem pateram exhaurit princeps. "Bohemus in Saxonia. Adeo immoderate & immodeste ab ipsis bibitur, ut in compotationibus suis non cyathis solum & cantharis sac infundere possint, sed impletum mulctrale apponant, & scutella injecta hortantur quemlibet ad libitum potare. • Dictu incredibile, quantum hujusce liquoris immodesta gens capiat, plus potantem amicissimum habent, & serto coronant, inimicissimum è contra qui non vult, & cæde & fustibus expiant. Qui potare recusat, hostis habetur, & cæde nonnunquam res expiatur, Qui melius bibit pro salute domini, melior habetur minister. Pocta apud Stobæum, scr. 18. Q3 • Græc. potest potest ac in bello, as much valor is to be found in feasting, as in fighting, and some of our City Captains, and Carpet Knights will make this good, and prove it. Thus they many times wilfully pervert the good temperature of their bodies, stifle their wits, strangle nature, and degenerate into beasts. Some again are in the other extream, and draw this mischief on their heads by too ceremonious and strict diet, being over precise, Cockney-like, and curious in their observation of meats, times, as that Medicina statica prescribes, just so many ounces at dinner, which Lessius enjoyns, so much at supper, not a little more, nor a little less, of such meat, and at such hours, a dyet drink in the morning, Cock-broth, China-broth, at dinner, Plumb-broth, a Chicken, a Rabbet, rib of a Rack of Mutton, wing of a Capon, the Merry-thought of a Hen, &c. to sounder bodies this is too nice and most absurd. Others offend in overmuch fasting: Pining adays, saith Guianerius, and waking anights, as many Moors and Turks in these our times do. "Anchorites, Monks, and the rest of that superstitious rank (as the same Guianerius witnesseth, That he hath often seen to have happened in his time) through immoderate fasting, have been frequently mad." Of such men belike Hippocrates speaks, 1. Aphor. 5. when as he saith, "They more offend in too sparing diet, and are worse damnified, then they that feed liberally, and are ready to surfet, SUBSEC. III. Custom of Dyet, Delight, Appetite, Necessity, how they cause or hinder. O rule is so general, which admits not some exception; to this therefore which hath been hitherto said, (for I shall otherwise put most men out of commons) and those inconveniences which proceed from the substance of meats, an intemperate or unseasonable use of them, custom somewhat detracts, and qualifies, according to that of Hippocrates 2. Aphoris. 50. "Such things as we have been long customed to, though they be evill in their own nature; yet they are less offensive." Otherwise it might well be objected, that it were a Qui de die jejunant, et nocte vigilant, facile cadunt in melancholiam; et qui naturæ modum excedunt, c. 5. tract. 15. c. 2. Longa famis tolerantia, ut iis sæpe accidit qui tanto cum fervore Deo servire cupiun per jejunium, quod maniaci efficiantur, ipse vidi sæpe. In tenui victu ægri delinquunt, ex quo fit ut majori afficiantur detrimento, majorque fit error tenui quam pleniore victu. Quæ longo tempore consueta sunt, etiamsi deteriora, minus in assuetis molestare solent. meer h meer tyrannie to live after those strict rules of Physick; for custom doth alter nature it self, and to such as are used to them it makes bad meats wholesome, and unseasonable times to cause no disorder. Cider and Perry are windy drinks, so are all fruits windy in themselves, cold most part, yet in some shires of England, Normandy in France, Guipuscoa in Spain, 'tis their common drink, and they are no whit offended with it. In Spain, Italy, and Africk, they live most on roots, raw hearbs, Camels milk, and it agrees well with them; which to a stranger will cause much grievance. In Wales, lacticiniis vescuntur, as Humfrey Lluyd confesseth, a Cambro-Brittain himself, in his elegant Epistle to Abraham Ortelius, they live most on white meats: in Holland on Fish, Roots, Butter; and so at this day in Greece, as * Bellonius observes, they had much rather feed on fish than flesh. With us Maxima pars victus in carne consistit, we feed on flesh most part, saith *Polydor Vergil, as all Northern countries do; and it would be very offensive to us to live after their dyet, or they to live after ours: We drink beer, they Wine; they use Oyl, we Butter: we in the North are great eaters, they most sparing in those hotter Countries: and yet they and we following our own customs are well pleased. An Ethiopian of old seeing an European eat bread, wondered, quomodo stercoribus vescentes viverimus, how we could eat such kinde of meats: so much differed his Country-men from our's in dyet, that as mine +Author infers, si quis illorum victum apud nos æmulari vellet; if any man should so feed with us, it would be all one to nourish, as Cicuta, Aconitum, or Hellebor it self. At this day in China the common people live in a maner altogether on roots and herbs, and to the wealthyest, Horse, Ass, Mule, Dogs, Cat-flesh is as delightsom as the rest, so Mat. Riccius the Jesuit relates, who lived many years amongst them. The Tartars eat raw meat, and most commonly "horse-flesh, drink milk and blood, as the Nomades of old. 1 m • Qui medicè vivit, miserè vivit. f Consuetudo altera natura. & Herefordshire, Glocestershire, Worcestershire. h Leo Afer. 1. 1. solo camelorum lacte contenti, nil præterea delitiarum ambiunt. i Flandri vinum butyro dilutum bibunt (nauseo referens) ubiq; butyrum inter omnia fercula et bellaria locum obtinet. Steph. præfat. Herod. *Delectantur Græci piscibus magis quam carnibus. Lib. 1. hist. Ang. P. Jovius descript. Britonum. they sit, eat and drink all day at dinner in Iscland, Muscovy, and those Northern parts. + Suidas vict. Herod. nihilo cum co melius quam si quis Cicutam, Aconitum, &c. Expedit. in Sinas lib. 1. c. 3. hortensium herbarum et olerum, apud Sinas quam apud nos longe frequenotor usus, complures quippe de vulgo reperias nulla alia re vel tenuitatis, vel religionis causa vescentes. Equus, Mulus, Asellus, &c. æquè ferè vescuntur ac pabula omnia, Mat. Riccius, lib. 5. cap. 12. "Tartari mulis, equis vescuntur et crudis carnibus, et fruges contemnunt, dicentes, hoc jumentorum pabulum et boum, non hominum. m |