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world, --hews him all the kingdoms of the earth, and the glory of them, points out the many ways of advancing his fortune, and raising himself to honour lays before his eyes - all the charms and bewitching temptations of power, and asks, if there can be any happiness in this world like that of being caressed, courted, flattered, and followed ?
To close all, the Philofopher meets him bustling in the full career of his pursuit-stops him tells him, if he is in search of happiness, he is far gone out of his way. That this deity has long been banished from noise and tumults, where there was no rest found for her, and was fed into solitude far from all commerce of the world ; and, in a word, if he would find her, he must leave this busy and intriguing scene, and go back to that peaceful scene of retirement and books, from which he at first set out.
In this circle too often does a man run, tries all experiments, and generally fits down wearied and difsatisfied with them all at laft-in utter despair of ever accomplishing what he wants--nor knowing what to trust to after so many disappointments; or where to lay the fault, whether in the incapacity of his own nature, or in the insufficiency of the enjoyments themselves.
SERM. I. P. I.
TRIBUTE OF AFFECTION.
Toby, once for all, the tribute I owe thy goodness; here let me thrust my chair aside, and kneel down upon the ground, whilft I am pouring forth the warmest sentiments of love for thee, and veneration for the excellency of thy character, that ever virtue and nature kindled in a nephew's bosom. Peace and comfort rest for ever more upon thy head!
Thou enviedft no man's comforts, insultedft no man's opinions. Thou blackenedst no man's character,--devouredst no man's bread: gently, with faithful Irim behind thee, didft thou amble round the little circle of thy pleasures, joftling no creature in the way: --for each one's forrows thou hadít a téar,
-for each man's need thou hadft a fhilling. Whilst I am worth one, to pay a weeder,--thy path from thy door to thy bowling-green shall never be grown up-Whilft there is a rood and a half of land in the Shanay family, thy fortifications, my dear uncle Toby, shall never be de molith'd.
E, SHANDY, YOL. IT, CHAP. 27.
YORICK'S DEATH A BROKEN HEART.
THE Mortgager, and Mortgagés differ the one
from the other, not more in length of purse, than the Fester and Jeftée do, in that of memory. But in this the comparison between them runs, as the scholiasts call it, upon all fours: (which, by the bye, is upon one or two legs - more than some of the best of Homer's can pretend to);--namely, That the one raises a fum, and the other a laugh at your expence and thinks no more about it. Interest, however, still ruins on in both cases ;--the periodical or accidental payments of it, just ferving to keep the memory of the affair alive; 'till at lengh, in some evil hour, pop comes the creditor upon each, and by demanding principal upon the spot, together with full interest to the
very days, makes them both feel the full extent of their obligations.
As the reader (for I hate your ifs) has a thorough knowledge of human nature, I need not say more to satisfy him, that my Hero could not go on at this rate without some fight experience of these incidental mementos. To speak the truth, lie had wantonly involved himself, in a multitude of small book debts of this stamp, whichy notwithstanding Eugenius's frequent advice, he too much disregarded; thinking, that as nat one of them was contracted through any malignancy,--but, on the contrary, from an honesty
of mind, and a mere jocundity of humour, they would all of them be cross'd out in course.
Eugenius would never admit this; and would often tell him, that one day or other he would certainly be reckoned with: and he would often add, in an accent of sorrowful apprehension, to the uttermost mite. To which Yorick, with his usual carelessness of heart, would as often answer with a pihaw !-and if the subject was started in the fields, with a hop, kip, and a jump at the end of it; but if close pent up. in the social chimney-corner, where the culprit was barricado'd in, with a table and a couple of arm• chairs, and could not so readily fly off in a tangent, Eugenius would then go on with his lecture upon dil. cretion in words to this purpose, though somewhat better put together.
Trust me, dear Yorick, this unwary pleasantry of thine will sooner or later bring thee into scrapes and difficulties, which no after-wit can extricate thee' out of-In these fallies, too oft, I see, it happens that a person laughed at, confiders himself in the light of a person injured, with all the rights of such a situation belonging to him; and when thou viewest him in that light too, and reckons up his friends, his family, his kindred and allies and musters up with them the many recruits that will lift under him from a sense of common danger ; s'tis no 'extravagant arithmetic to say, that for every ten jokes, thou haft hundred enemies; and till thou hast gone on, and raised a swarm of wasps about thine ears, and art half
itung to death by them, thou wilt never be convinced it is fo.
I cannot suspect it in the man whom I esteem, that there is the least fpur from spleen, or malevolence of intent in these fallies--I believe and know them to be truly honest and sportive :-But consider, my dear lad, that fools cannot diftinguish this, and that knaves will not ;--and thou knoweft not what it is, either to provoke the one, or to make merry with the other :--whenever they associate for mutual defence, depend upon it, they will carry on the war in fuch a manner against thee, my dear friend, as to make thee heartily fick of it, and of thy life too.
Revenge, from some baneful corner, shall level a tale of dishonour at thee, which no innocence of heart or integrity of conduct thall set right. The fornunes of thy house fhall totter,--thy character, which led the way to them, shall bleed on every fide of it, thy faith questioned, thy works belied-thy wit for gotten-thy learning trampled on. To wind up the laft fcene of thy tragedy, CRUELTY and CowARDICE, twin ruffians, hired and set on by Malice in the dark, thall strike together at all thy infirmities and mistakes :- The best of us, my dear lad, lie open there, and trust me,--trust me, Yorick, when te gratify a private appetite, it is once resolved upon, that an innocent and an helplefs creature shall be facrificed, 'tis an easy matter to pick up sticks enough from any thicket where it bas strayed, to make a fire to offer it up with.