contented with the literary credit I had now acquired, I had been happy; but I was ambitious of convincing the world I was not the idle owner of weapons, which I did not know the ufe of; I feized every fafe opportunity of making my pretenfions refpected by fuch dabblers in the belles lettres, who paid court to me, and as I was ever cautious of ftepping an inch beyond my tether on these occafions, I foon found myself credited for more learning, than my real stock amounted to. I received all visitors in my library, affected a ftudious air, and took care to furnish my table with volumes of a felect fort; upon thefe I was prepared to defcant, if by chance a curious friend took up any one of them, and as there is little fame to be got by treading in the beaten track of popular opinion, I fometimes took the liberty to be eccentric and paradoxical in my criticisms and cavils, which gained me great refpect from the ignorant, (for upon fuch only I took care to practise this chicanery) fo that in a fhort time I became a fovereign dictator within a certain fet, who looked up to me for fecond hand opinions in all matters of literary taste, and faw myself inaugurated by my Aatterers cenfor of all new publications.

My trumpeters had now made fuch a noife in

the

the world, that I began to be in great request, and men of real literature laid out for my ac quaintance; but here I acted with a coldness, that was in me conftitutional as well as pru dential: I was refolved not to risk my laurels, and throw away the fruits of a triumph fo cheaply purchased: folicitations, that would have flattered others, only alarmed me; fuch was not the fociety I delighted in; against such attacks Į entrenched myself with the most jealous caution: If however by accident I was drawn out of my faftneffes, and trapped unawares into an ambufcade of wicked wits, I armed myself to meet them with a triple tier of fmiles; I primed my lips with fuch a ready charge of flattery, that when I had once engaged them in the pleasing contemplation of their own merits, they were feldom difpofed to fcrutinize into mine, and thus in general I contrived to escape undetected. Though it was no easy matter to extort an opinion from me in such companies, yet sometimes I was unavoidably entangled in converfation, and then I was forced to have recourse to all my addrefs; happily my features were habituated to a smile of the most convertible fort, for it would answer the purposes of affected humility as well as those of actual contempt, to which in truth it was more conge

nial: my opinion, therefore, upon any point of controverfy flattered both parties and befriended neither; it was calculated to imprefs the company with an idea that I knew much more than I profeft to know; it was in short so infinuating, fo fubmitted, fo hesitating, that a man must have had the heart of Nero to have perfecuted a being fo absolutely inoffenfive: but these facrifices coft me dear, for they were foreign to my nature, and, as I hated my fuperiors, I avoided their fociety.

Having fufficiently diftinguished myself as a critic, I now began to meditate fome fecret attempts as an author; but in these the fame caution attended me, and my performances did not rife above a little fonnet, or a parody, which I circulated through a few hands without a name, prepared to disavow it, if it was not applauded to my wishes: I alfo wrote occafional essays and paragraphs for the public prints, by way of try ing my talents in various kinds of ftile; by these experiments I acquired a certain facility of imi tating other people's manner and difguifing my own, and fo far my point was gained; but as for the fecret fatisfaction I had promised myself in hearing my productions applauded, of that I was altogether difappointed; for though I tried both

praise

praife and difpraise for the purpose of bringing them into notice, I never had the pleasure to be contradicted by any man in the latter cafe, or feconded by a living foul in the former: I had circulated a little poem, which coft me fome pains, and as I had been flattered with the applause it gained from several of its readers, I put it one evening in my pocket, and went to the houfe of a certain perfon, who was much reforted to by men of genius: an opportunity luckily offered for producing my manufcript, which I was prepared to avow as soon as the company present had given sentence in its favour: it was put into the hands of a dramatic author of fome celebrity, who read it aloud, and in a manner as I thought that clearly anticipated his dif guft: as foon therefore as he had finished it and demanded of me if I knew the author, I had no hefitation to declare that I did not-Then I prefume, rejoined he, it is no offence to say I think it the merelt trash I ever read--None in life, I replied, and from that moment held him in everlafting hatred.

Difgufted with the world I now began to dip my pen in gall, and as foon as I had fingled out a proper object for my fpleen, I looked round him for his weak fide, where I could place a

blow

blow to beft effect, and wound him undifcovered: the author abovementioned had a full share of my attention; he was an irritable man, and I have feen him agonized with the pain, which my very fhafts had given him, whilft I was foremost to arraign the fcurrility of the age and encourage him to difregard it: the practife I had been in of mafking my ftile facilitated my attacks upon every body, who either moved my envy, or provoked my fpleen.

The meanest of all paffions had now taken entire poffeffion of my heart, and I furrendered myself to it without a struggle: still there was a consciousness about me, that funk me in my own efteem, and when I met the eye of a man, whom I had fecretly defamed; I felt abashed fociety became painful to me; and I fhrunk into retirement, for my self-esteem was loft; though I had gratified my malice, I had deftroyed my comfort; I now contemplated myself a folitary being at the very moment when I had every requifite of fortune, health and endowments to have recommended me to the world, and to those tender ties and engagements, which are natural to man and conftitute his best enjoyments.

The folitude, I reforted to, made me every day more morofe, and fupplied me with reflec