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And as in like case a good fellow that had but a peck of cora weekly to grind, vet would needs bu:ld a new mill for it, found his error eftsoons, for either he must let his mill lye waste, pull
rither he is not for the milli.. it quite down, or let others grind at it. So these men, &c.
Seneca therefore disallows all such uuseasonable matches, habent enim maledicti locum crebre nuptiæ. And as * Tully farther inveighs, “ 'tis unfit for any, but ugly and filthy in old age," Turpe senilis amor, one of the three things + God hateth. Plutarch in his bo k contra Coleten, rails downright at such kind of narıiages, which are attempted by old men, qui jam corpore impotenti, & à voluptatibus deserti, peccant anino, and inakes a question whether in soine cases it be tolerable at least for such a man to marry,
qui Venerem affectat sine viribus," that is now past those venerous exercises, “as a gelded man lies with a virgin and sighs,” Ecclus 30. 20. and now complains with him in Petronius, funeruta est hæc pars jam, quæ fuit alim Achillea, he is quite done,
“ Vixit puellæ nuper idoneus,
Et militavit non sine gloriâ.” But the question is whether he inay delight himself as those Priapeian Popes, which in their decrepit age lay commonly be. tween two wenches every night, contactu formosarum, & con. trectatione, num adhuc gaudeat; and as many doting Syres still do to their own shame, their children's undoing, and their famiiies confusion: hea jhors it, tanquam ab agresti & furioso do nino fugiendum, It must be avoided as a Bedlam master, and not obeyed.
Triste ululat," the divel himself makes such matches. *Levinus Lemnius reckons up th ee things which generally disturb the peace of marriage : the first is when they marry intempestive or unseasonably, “as many mortal men marry precipitately and inconsilerately, when they are effæte and old: The second when they marry unequally for fortunes and birth : the third, when a sick impotent person weds one that is sound," novæ nuptie spes frustratur: Many dislikes instantly follow. Many doting
* Offic. lib. Luxuria cum omni ætati turpis, tum senectuti fædissima. f Ecclus. 25. 2. An old man that dotes, &c. Hor. lib. 3. ode 26 Cap. 54. instit. ad optimam vitam, max ma mortalium pars præcipitanter & inconsiderate nubit, idque ea ætate quæ m.nus apta est, quum senex adolescentulæ, sanus morbidæ, dives pauperi, &c.
dizards, it may not be denyed, as Plutarch confesseth, “yreCreate themselves with such obsolete, unseasonable and filthy remedies (so he calls them), with a reinembrance of their former pleasures, against nature they stir up their dead flesh :” but an old lecher is abominable ; mulier tertiò nubens, ? Nevisanus holds, presumitur lubrica & inconstans, a woman that marries the third time may be presumed to be no honester then she should. Of them both, thus Ambrose concludes in his comment upon Luke," a they that are coupled together, not to get children, but to satisfie their lust, are not husbands, but forni. cators,” with whom St. Austin consents: matrimony without hope of children, non matriinonium, sed concubium dici debet, is not a wedding but a jumbling or coupling together. In a word (except they wed for mutual society, help and comfort onc of another, in which respects, though * Tiberius deny it, with. out question old folks may well marry) for sometimes a man hath most need of a wife, according to Puccius, when he hath no need of a wife; otherwise it is most odious, when an old Acheronticke dizard, that hath one foot in his grave, à silicernium, shall flicker after a lusty yong wench that is blithe and bonny,
- "Ş salaciorque
Verno passere, & albulis columbis."
“o Tu cano capite amas senex nequissime
Thy filthy face, it doth so move. Yet, as some will, it is much more tolerable for an old man to marry a yong woman (our Ladies match they call it) for cras erit mulier, as he said in Tully. Cato the Roman, Critobulus in + Xenophon, | Tyraquellus of late, Julius Scaliger, &c. and many fanious presidents we have in that kind; but not è contra : 'tis not held fit for an ancient woman to match with a yong man. For as Varro will, Anus dum ludit morti delitias
Absoleto, intempestivo, turpi remedio fatentur se uti; recordatione pristinarum voluptatum se recreant, & adversante natura, pollinctam carnem & enectam excitant. Lib. 2. nu. 25. • Qui vero non procreandæ prolis, sed explendæ libidinis causa sibi invicem copulantur, non tam conjuges quam fornicarii habcntur. * Lex Papia. Sueton. Claud. c. 23. Pontanus biarum lib. I. Plautus mercator. + Symposio. Vide Thuani historiam.
facit, 'tis Charon's match between * Cascus and Casca, and the devił him elf is surely well pleased with it. And therefore as the Poet inveighs, thou old Vetustina bed-ridden quean, that art now skin and bones,
“ Cui tres capilli, quatuorque sunt dentes,
And duggs like spiders web to boot. Must thou marry a youth again? And yet ducentas ire nuptum post mortes amant : howsoever it is, as d Apuleius gives out of his Meroe, congressus annosus, pestilens, abhorrendus, a pestilent match, abominable, and not to be endured. In such case how can they otherwise choose but be jealous, how should they agree one with another? This inequality is not in years only, but in birth, fortunes, conditions, and all good qualities,
“ + Si qua volés aptè nubere, nube pari,” 'Tis my counsel, saith Anthony Guiverra, to chose such a one. Civis Civem ducat, Nobilis Nobilem, let a citizen match with a citizen, a gentleinan with a gentlewoman; he that observes not this precept (saith he) non generum sed malum Genium, non nurum sed Furiam, non vite Comitem, sed litis fomitem domi habebit, in stead of a fair wife shall have a fury, for a fit son in law a meer feind, &c. examples are too frequent.
Another main caution fit to be observed, is this, that though they be equal in years, birth, fortunes, and other conditions, yet they do not omit vertue and good education, which Muso. nius and Antipater so much inculcate in Stubeus;
“ Dos est magna parentum
Certo fædere castitas.” If, as Plutarch adviseth, one must eat modium salis, a bushell of salt with him, before he chuse his friend, what care should be had in chusing a wife, his second self, how sollicitous should he be to know her qualities and behaviour ? and when he is assured of them, not to prefer birth, fortune, beauty, before bringing up, and good conditions. Coquage god of Cuckolds, as one merrily said, accompanies the goddess jealousie, both
Lib. 1. Miles,
e Calabect vet. poetarum. * Martial. lib. 3. 62. Epig. + Ovid, Rablas hist. Pantagruel. 1. 3. cap. 33.
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follow the fairest, by Jupiter's appointment, and they sacrifice to them together: beauty and honesty seldom agree; straight personages have often crooked manners ; fair faces, fvul vices; good complexions, ill conditions. S'uspitionis plena res est, & insidiarum, beauty saith 'Chrysostome) is full of treachery and suspition : he that hath a fair wife, cannot have a worse mischief, and yet most covet it, as if nothing else in marriage but that and wealth were to be respected. & Francis Sforza, Duke of Millain, was so curious in this behalf, that he would not marry the Duke of Mantua's daughter, except he might see her naked first : Which Lycurgus appointed in his lawes, and Morus in his Utopian Commonwealth approves. In Italy, as a travellour observes, if a man have three or four daughters, or more, and they prove fair, they are married eftsoones : if de. formed, they change their lovely names of Lucia, Cynthia, Ca. mæna, call ihem Dorothie, Ursula, Briget, and so put them into Monasteries, as if none were fit for marriage, but such as are eminentlie fair: but these are erroneous tenents: a modest virgin well conditioned, to such a fair snout peece, is much to be preferred. If thou wilt avoid them, take away all causes of suspition and jealousie, marry a course peece, fetch her from Cassandra's i Temple, which was wont in Italy to be a Sanctuary of all deformed maids, and so thou shall be sure that no man will make thee cuckold, but for spight. A citizen of Bizance in France had a filthy dowdy, deformed slut to his wife, and finding her in bed with another man, cryed out as one amazed; “ O miser!” quæ te necessitas huc adegit? O thou wretch, what necessity brought thee hither? as well he might; for who can affect such a one? But this is warily to be understood, most offend in another extreamn, they prefer wealth be. fore beauty, and so she be rich, they care not how she look ; but these are all out as faulty as the rest. Attendenda uxoris forma, as k Salisburiensis adviseth, ne si alteram aspexeris, mox eam sordere putes, as the Knight in Chaucer that was married to an old woman,
and all day after hid him as an owl,
So woe was his wife looked so foul, Have a care of thy wife's complexion, lest whilst thou seest another, thou loathest her, she prove jealous, thou naught,
Hom. 80. Qui pulchram habet uxorem, nihil pejus habere potest. Ar. niseus. b Itinerar. Ital. Coloniæ edit. 1620. Nomine trium Ger. fol. 304. displicuit quod dominæ filiabus immutent nomen inditum in Baptismo, & pro Catharina, Margareta, &c. ne quid desit ad luxuriam, appellant ipsas nominibus Cynthiæ, Camænæ, &c. Leonicus de yar. lib. 3. c. 43. Asylus virginum deformium Cassandræ templum. Plutarch. W Polycrat. I. 8. cap. 11.
« Si tibi deformis conjux, si serva venusta,
Ne utaris servâ,” I can perhaps give instance, Molestum est possidere, quod nemo haberc dignetur, a inisery to possess that which no inan likes : on the other side, Difficile custoditur quod plures amant, And as the bragging souldier vaunted in the Comedy, nimia est miseria pulchrum esse hominem nimis. Scipio did never so hardly besiege Carthage, as these yong gallants will beset thine house, one with wit or person, another with wealth, &c. If she be fair, saith Guazzo, she will be suspected howsoever. Both extreams are naught, Pulchra citò adamatur, fæda facile concupiscit, the one is soon beloved, the other loves : one is hardly kept, because proud and arrogant, the other not worth keeping; what is to be done in this case? Ennius in Menelippe adviseth thee as a friend to take statam formam, si vis habere incolumem pudicitiam, one of a middle size, neither too fair, nor too foul,
«* Nec formosa magis quam mihi casta placet,” with old Cato, though fit let her beauty be, neque lectissima, neque illiberalis, between both. This I approve ; but of the other two I resolve with Salisburiensis, ceteris paribus, both rich alike, endowed alike, majori miseriá deformis habetur quam formosa servatur, I had rather marry a fair one, and put it to the hazard, than be troubled with a blowze; but do thou as thou wilt, I speak only of my self.
Howsoever, quod iterum monco, I would advise thee thus inuch, be she fair or foul, to choose a wife out of a good kindred, parentage, well brought up, in an honest place.
“ + Primum animo tibi proponas quo sanguine creta,
Moribus, in junctos veniat nova nupta penates.” He that marries a wife out of a suspected Inne or Alehouse, buyes a horse in Smithfield, and hires a servant in Paul's, as the diverbe is, shall likely have a jade to his horse, a knave for his man, an arrant honest woman to his wife. Filia præsumitur esse matri similis, saith 'Nevisanus ? “ Such ma mother, such a daughter;" mali corvi malum ovum, Cat to her kind.
“ Scilicet expectas ut tradat mater honestos
Atque alios mores quàm quos habet?” If the mother be dishonest, in all likelihood the daughter will
* Marullus. of Chaloner lib. 9. de repub. Ang. ' Lib. 2. num. 159, * Si genetrix caste, caste quoque filia vivit; Si mcretrix mater, filia talis erit. #Juven. Sat. 6.