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Before Page's House in. Windsor.
Falstaffs, he shall not abuse Robert Shallow, Efq;
Slen. In the county of Gloucester, justice of peace, and Coram.
Shal. Ay, cousin Slender, and Custalorum.
Slen. Ay, and Rato-lorum too; and a gentleman born, master parson, who writes himself Armigero in any bill, warrant, quittance, or obligation; Armigero.
Shal. Ay, that I do, and have done any time these three hundred
Slen. All his successors, gone before him, have don't; and all his ancestors, that come after him, may; they may give the dozen white luces in their Coat.
* This Play was written in the Author's best and ripest Years , after Henry the Fourth, by the command of Queen Elizabeth. There is a tradition that it was composed at a Fortnight's Warning: But that must be meant only of the first imperfe& Sketch of this Comedy, which is yet extant in an old Quarto Edition printed in 1619. This which we have here was altered and improved by the Author almost in every Specch.
Shal. It is an old Coat.
Eva. The dozen white lowfes do become an old coat well; it agrees well, passant; it is a familiar beast to man, and signifies love.
Shal. The luce is the fresh-fish, the falt-fish is an old Coat.
Slen. I may quarter, coz.
Eva. Yes, per-lady; if he has a quarter of your coat, there is but three skirts for yourself, in my fimple conje&ures; but that is all one: if Sir John Falstaff have committed disparagements upon you,
I am of the Church, and would be glad to do my
benevolence, to make atonements and compromises between
you. Shal. The Council shall hear it; it is a riot.
Eva. It is not meet, the Council hear of a riot; there is no fear of Got in a riot; the Council, look you, shall desire to hear the fear of Got, and not to hear a riot; take
viza-ments in that. Shal. Ha! o'my life, if I were young again, the sword should end it.
Eva. It is petter that friendls is the sword, and end it; and there is also another device in my prain, which, peradventure, prings good discretions with it: there is Anne Page, which is daughter to master George Page, which is pretty virginity.
Slen. Mistress Anne Page? she has brown hair, and fpeaks small like a woman.
Eva. It is that ferry person for all the orld, as just as you will defire ; and seven hundred pounds of monies, and gold and silver, is her grandfire upon his death's-bed (Got deliver to a joyful resurrections) give, when she is able to overtake seventeen years old: it were a good motion, if we leave our pribbles
and prabbles, and desire a marriage between master Abraham and mistress Anne Page.
Slen. Did her grand-lire leave her seven hundred pounds?
Eva. Ay, and her father is make her a petter penny,
Slen. I know the young gentlewoman; she has good gifts.
Eva. Seven hundred pounds, and possibilities, is good gifts.
Shal. Well; let us see honest Mr. Page : is Falstaff there?
Eva. Shall I tell you a lie? I do despise, a liar, as I do despise one that is false; or as I despise one that is not true. The Knight, Sir John, is there; and, I beseech you, be ruled by your well-wishers. I will peat the door [Knocks] for master Page. What, hoa? Got bless your house here.
SC E N E II.
Enter Mr. Page. Page. W da. Here is Got's plessing; and your friend, and Justice Shallow ; and here's young mafter Slender ; that, peradventures, shall tell you another tale, if matters grow_to your likings.
Page. I am glad to see your worships well. I thank you for my venison, master Shallow.
Shal. Máster Page, I am glad to see you; much good do it your good heart: I wish'd your venison better; it was ill kill'd. How doth good mitress Page? and I thank you always with my heart, la; with my heart .
Page. Sir, I thank you.
Slen. How do's your fallow greyhound, Sir? I heard say, he was out-run on Cotfale..
Page. It could not be judg’d, Sir.
Shal. That he will not; 'tis your fault, 'tis your fault; 'tis a good dog.
Page. A cur, Sir.
Shal. Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog ; can there be more faid? he is good and fair. Is Sir John Falstaff here?
Page. Sir he is within; and I would, I could do a good office between you.
Eva. It is spoke, as a christians ought to speak.
Shal. If it be confess'd, it is not redress'd ; is not that fo, master Page? he hath wrongd me; indeed, he hath; at a word, he hath; believe me, Robert Shallow Esquire faith, he is wrongd.
Page. Here comes Sir John.
Enter Sir John Falstaff, Bardolph, Nym and Pistol.
OW, master Shallow, you'll complain of me
to the King? Shal. Knight, you have beaten my men, kill'd my deer, and broke open my lodge.
Fal. But not kiss'd your keeper's daughter.
Fal. I will answer it strait; I have done all this. That is now answer’d.
Shal. The Council shall know this.
Fal. 'Twere better for you, if ’twere not known in Council; you'll be laugh'd at.
Eva. Pauca verba, Sir John, good worts.
Fal. Good worts? good cabbage. Slender, I broke your head; what matter have you against me? Slen. Marry, Sir, I have matter in my head against
you, and against your cony-catching-rascals Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol.
Bar. You Banbury cheese!
Nym. Slice, I say; pauca, pauca : flice, that's my humour. Slen. Where's Simple, my man? can you tell, cou
fin ? Eva. Peace: I pray you : now let us understand there is three umpires in this matter, as I understand; that is, master Page; fidelicet, master Page; and there is myself: fidelicet, myself; and the three party is, lastly and finally, mine Host of the Garter.
Page. We three to hear it, and end it between them.
Eva. Ferry goot; I will make a prief of it in my note-book, and we will afterwards ork upon the cause with as great discreetly as we can.
Fal. Pistol. Pift. He hears with ears. Eva. The tevil and his tam! what phrase is this, he hears with ear? why, it is affe&tations.
Fal. Pistol, did you pick master Slender's purse?
Slen. Ay, by these gloves, did he ; (or I would I might never come in mine own great chamber again else,) of seven groats in mill-fixpences, and two Edward shovel-boards, that cost me two shillings and two pence a-piece of Yead Miller, by, these gloves.
Fal. Is this true, Pistol ?
and master mine.