that the fingers of the Tartars, when they attempted to take snuff, froze to their faces; multitudes lost their way and were picked off, partly by the Tobolskians and more by the frost; and the Great KAN himself, in his usual hurry to dispatch things, rode up full butt against the city of Irkutsk, and gave himself a knock-me-down blow on the spot. The consequence was, the flight of the rest of his army, followed by his own; for, recovering himself after a while he resumed his usual expedition, and, outstripping his soldiers arrived, through clouds of assailants, at his chief city, Samarcand. where it is said, quietly seating himself, he took a pinch of warm snuff, and said, "This is much better than in Tobolski." His admirers (for he still had some, as he had not lost every thing) said that this was a proper piece of inflexibility, becoming a soldier of great views; but the old dynasty kings, and their friends, said it was mere unfeelingness, and quoted the examples of their own ancestors, who, after seeing their subjects cut up, on similar occasions, always looked very grave and devout.

It will easily be imagined that these princes did not lose the precious opportunity offered them. They were now grown a little wiser. They talked no more of their favourite dynasties, and of an old idol they worshipped, called JUSDY-VINUM; that is to say, in English, the DIVINE HUM; but cried out for revenge against the KAN'S ambition and anti-public behaviour, and roused a general spirit accordingly, which had never looked so favourably for their cause. They collected together instantly, hung upon the rear of his army, drew all his remaining vassals from him but one, and making gradual progress, for he again went out to meet them, proceeded to give him final battle at the walls of his own city. Even there, however, intimidated by the resistance he and his people made, they were induced, in spite of all their long hopes and rancour, to offer him terms of peace; and even then, stimulated by the same ambition which had hitherto prospered in proportion to its daring, he refused them. He fought and lost. Why need we dwell upon particulars? his Generals forsook him: he abdicated the throne; the promises of his enemies vanish with their success; the grinning image of old JUSDY-VINUM, with a death's head in one hand, a scourge in the other, and a man under his feet, is placed up again in Samarcand;-in short, the POOR-BONES are recalled to the throne; while he himself, for they still feared him, sent him to live in an island, where it was thought he must inevitably lose both his fat and his renown.

Who now rejoices but every Prince in Asia, and who so merry above all as the Prince of HING and his Ministers? All over Hing, and China, and every where else, there was nothing but the ringing of bells and the lighting of lanthorns. The lovers of liberty, indeed, some of whom had been credulous enough to believe the promises of the Kings, began to exclaim against them again; for being now quite freed from their apprehensions, and able to do as they really wished, they began playing the very same game with thrones and countries as NAH PO-LEE-HON had done,-giving one to this friend, and taking away t'other from that enemy; but the necessity for liberty's assistance had gone by; and what

with the tergiversations of some of its old friends, the despondency. of others, and the shoutings of all the soldiers in Asia, except the Tartars, its voice was no more regarded than it used to be at first. Well, -we must wait a little, nevertheless, for an account of the rejoicings of the Prince of HING and his Ministers; for, lo and behold, all of a sudden, with a thunderclap, comes a fine apparition, -no less than NAH-PO-LEE-HON himself, as fat and free-looking as ever, landed in Tartary, and walking up to Samarcand, swinging his sleeve about, as if nothing had happened!-The old restored Kan Loo-Hiss, with the rest of the POOR-BONES, makes his retreat as quickly as possible, we say as possible, for it must be allowed, in candour, that he had been an accomplished diner, and, contrary to the general cast of the family, was unwieldy enough to be impressively handsome. Off however he goes; and the Great KAN sits down with his usual face, to take his pinch of snuff, and ask about the state of the Tartar swords and horses.

It is easy to conceive the feelings of all the Sovereigns. It look ed clear that he was welcome back, and that he had now got another chance for reigning; but they could not, they thought, retreat in decency, after all their triumph; and, besides, NAH-POLEE-HON was now making popular professions in his turn. He had always spoken very contemptuously, in private, of the idola trous worship of Fo, which he used to couple with the profane word "Nonsense," saying, whenever it was mentioned to him, "Fo! Nonsense!" He now added to this a particularly contemptuous mention of old JUSDY-VINUM, whom he even publicly pulled by the beard so that it was thought that, in addition to the public improvements, which in some respects were inevitably connected with his cause, he would get into the new ambition of reigning like the Prince of a free people, and outwitting opposition in that way. Fresh preparations therefore were made for arms. The troops of Hing-Land and the people called the Pru-Shans, who had been particularly odious to the Tartars for their having entered their territories formerly with great circumstances of cruelty, and who, it must be owned, had been pretty retributively handled in return, were the first in the field,the former under the command of a general named VEL-HING-TONG, who had gained great reputa tion in Siam;-the latter under that of a very fierce old fellow, called, for his singular doggedness in battle, BLU-CHER; that is to say, the BLUE CUR.

NAH-PO-LEE-HON however, who, if other people lost not a minute's time, lost not a second's, was in the field before they expected him, and succeeded in attacking the Pru-Shans separately first. It is not exactly known what the Kolao VEL-HING-TONG was about but it is generally believed that he had fallen upon a set of ladies with such exquisitely small and tottering feet, that he could not help tottering about with them;-an amiable infirmity, but rather out of season just then. Be this as it may, NAH-POLEE-HON drove the Pru-Shans back; and then the troops of HingLand succeeding, attacked them. But here he found a very different business. It was not that VEL-HING-TONG, with all his cleverness, was so great a General, for it was clear by his not ha

ving been readier, and by his being compelled to bear the brunt of all that the others chose to do, that he was not; but the men of Hing were a sturdier race than the Tartars, for they were freer and had better habits, and as VEL-HING-TONG partook enough of the nature of his countrymen to let them evince all their courage and steadiness, the Tartar could make hardly any more impression upon them than upon so many rocks; till, just as ingenuity on one side, or physical force on the other must have been exhausted, up come the Pru-Shans again under the BLUE CUR, and decide the fortune of the day. NAH-PO-LEE-HON again flies to Samarcand, is again pursued, again abdicates, and finally, to consummate the glory of the men of Hing, delivers himself into their hands, and comes off their coast in a Hing vessel. All the junks belonging to the nation seem to bring the people out to see him; and there he stands me on the deck, as firm and as fat as ever, making salutation occasionally to the Hing ladies. "Ho!" as one of them observed, "but he was a very taking sort of a captive." In short, it was doubted, it seems, especially by the PRINCE of HING, whether a man so fat would not have made too great an impression; and so, as the POOR BONES were again restored, and it was intended to exalt old JUSDY-VINUM more than ever, it was thought proper to refuse him an asylum, and send him to an island a much greater way off than the last; and there, till some new enemy of Hing's, or a new insurrection, somehow or other, may release him, there he now is, looking as jolly, they say, as of old, and taking his snuff and his reverses with equal inflexibility.

Well, now then, assurance being doubly sure, what but the feasts and the lanthorns again? Out they coine once more; and the bowings, and scrapings, and flourishing of compliments are performed over again; the worship of old JUSDY-VINUM is more openly practised; a leading Tartar or two is sacrificed to him, and some of the GRAND LAMA'S adorers even call out for another day of BAR-THAU-LUM-HU, which was an anniversary on which a massacre took place in Samarcand.

But who so merry again as the PRINCE of HING and his Minsters ? Our readers may remember that, when we last mentioned this personage, we left him and his companions prac tising that alarming freak, which they took into their heads, of boring a hole through the island of Hing, and so threatening it with dissolution. They had begun to practise this portentous joke of theirs again, though not with such vigour as before, but left it off, and their cups too, for a while, at the noise of what was going on in Tartary. We described, it may be remembered, the extravagancies of the PRINCE of HING with regard to dress, and other matters; and in this respect also the calamity threatened to the island had had its use, the said extravagancies not taking effect among the upper classes, and being universally acknowledged for what they were. But he and his companions endeavoured to make up the loss in other ways; and the Ministers here joining with them, the pranks became ludicrous beyond measure. They really fancied that whatever the snows and other disasters in Tobolski had done, and whatever had been achieved in particular by their

countrymen at the last moment, they, they themselves, personally speaking, had been the overthrowers of the GREAT KAN. It is supposed that the disorder arose from their having drank a little too much during a visit which the Emperor of TOBOLSKI and others paid them; but, be this as it may, they all fell into the oddest imaginations. One thought himself a whole army of men; another fancied he was the wall of the city of Irkutsk; and a third, by some ingenious contrivance of the imagination, took himself for a fall of snow. You would have died to see the attitudes into which the latter threw himself;-he would rise on tip-toe, and bending forward, hang his head and arms archways in the most ridiculous manner, and fancy he saw NAH-PO-LEE-HON buttoning himself up, and blinking away underneath. This, we are told, was the Mandarin KAH-STLEE-RA. The army of men was a Mandarin of the name of GENG-KING-SONG, who would remind those about him, with a great air of triumph, that he wanted to march to Samarcand some years ago; and then he would plant himself bolt upright, and winking his eyes, belabour his face all the while with his two fists, as if he were tiring out a whole army of blows. The wall, they say, was JEE-AUGE himself; and very mural and inflexible would he look, standing stock still, and getting one of the court scribes to personate NAH-PO-LEE-HON, and run smack up against him, so as to knock himself down,at which he would say, breathing as gently as he could contrive, and assuming all the satisfaction of aspect which he thought becoming in a wall,— There, you see how it is."

It is in vain some of the Hing people suggest on these occasions, that both facts and appearances go against them;-it is in vain they represent, with whatever humility, to my Lord GENG-KINGSONG, that he really is not a host in himself, or to the Mandarin KAH-STLEE-RA, that there is no possibility of his being at once what he is, and yet coming over you in the manner he pretends. They are not unwilling perhaps to allow that their Master may be mistaken; but as to themselves, they are perfectly sure how it is; and then my Lord GENG-KING-SONG looks infinite things at you, and his brother Mandarin puts on such a chilling and yet, at the same time, melting aspect, that you are glad to retreat, which he instantly takes for a proof of his pretensions. This is the deplora ble way they are in the present writing; and what is very shameful, some unlucky wags, who know better, have encouraged them in the notion lately, by means of their profession, as scribes; so that, during the Feast of Lanthorns, they have been playing such antics as there is no describing, and eating and drinking to each other in the characters of Snow, Army, and Wall, like the men in the play of our great European Poet.

We suppose the truth must come out, some how or other, at the approaching meeting of the Hing Representatives; but it is said that the patients are resolved, in spite of all advice, to stick to their pretensions in at assembly, of all others; and that JEE-AUGE has even ordered a dress for the occasion, which is the most oddly characteristic in the world, and as complete a piece of building as can be imagined.

MR. PHILLIPS'S SPEECHES, &c.

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Napoleon.

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NAPOLEON and the SPOTS IN THE SUN, or, the R--T'S WALTZ, and who waltzed with him-and where. A Poetical Flight, with Notes variorum. By SYNTAX SIDROPHEL, F.S.A. To Ge the Pe Rt great whiskers, And subjects and coats without faults;

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