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Kite. I will then, Cash-thou comfortest me- A wife may moderately use these pleasures, I'll drive these
Which numbers and the time give sanction to, Fiend-like fancies from me, and be myself again. Without the smallest blemish on her name. Think'st thou, she has perceived my folly? 'Twere Kite. And so she may“And I'll go with thee, Happy, if she had not-She has not
child; They, who know no evil, will suspect none. I will indeed—I'll lead thee there myself, Cash. True, sir, nor has your mind a blemish | And be the foremost reveller. I'll silence now.
The sneers of envy, stop the tongue of slander; This change has gladdened me-Here's my mis-Nor will I more be pointed at, as one
Disturbed with jealousy-
Kite. What !-Ha! never-ha, ha, ha!
She stabs me home. [Aside.] Jealous of thee! Enter WELL-BRED, Dame KITELY, and BRIDGET. | No, do not believe it-Speak low, my love
Well. What are you plotting, brother Kitely, Thy brother will overhear us-No, no, my dear, That thus of late you muse alone, and bear It could not be, it could not be-for-forSuch weighty care upon your pensive brow? What is the time now?-I shall be too late
[Laughs. No, no, thou may'st be satisfied Kite. My care is all for you, good sneering There's not the smallest spark remaining brother;
Remaining! What do I say? There never was, And well I wish, you'd take some wholesome Nor can, nor ever shall beso be satisfied counsel,
Is Cob within there? Give me a kiss, And curb your headstrong humours; trust me, My dear; there, there, now we are reconciled brother,
I'll be back immediately-Good-bye, good-byeYou were to blame to raise commotions here, | Ha! ha! jealous, I shall burst my sides with And hurt the peace and order of my house.
laughing, Well. No harm done, brother, I warrant you. Ha, ha! Cob, where are you, Cob? Ha, ha ! Since there is no harm done, anger costs
Erit. A man nothing, and a brave man is never
(Well-BRED and BRIDGET come forward. His own man, till he be angry-To keep
Well. What have you done to make your husHis valour in obscurity, is to keep himself, band part so merry from you? He has of late As it were, in a cloak-bag. What's a brave • been little given to laughter. Musician unless he play?
Dame. He laughed indeed, but seemingly What's a brave man unless he fight?
without mirth. His behaviour is new and strange. Dame. Aye, but what harm might have come He is much agitated, and has some whimsy in of it, brother?
his head, that puzzles mine to read it. Well. What, schooled on both sides ! Pr'ythee, Well. 'Tis jealousy, good sister, and writ so Bridget, save me from the rod and lecture. largely, that the blind may read it; have you not
[BRIDG. and WELL, retire. perceived it yet? Kite. With what a decent modesty she rates Dame. If Í have, 'tis not always prudent, that him!
my tongue should betray iny eyes; so far my My heart's at ease, and she shall see it is wisdom tends, good brother, and little more I How art thou, wife? Thou look'st both gay and boast–But what makes him ever calling for Cob comely.
so? I wonder how he can employ him. In troth thou dost~ I'm sent for out, my dear, Well. Indeed, sister, to ask how he employs But I shall soon return-Indeed, my life, Cob, is a necessary question for you, that are his Business, that forces ine abroad, grows irksome. wife, and a thing not very easy for you to be saI could content me with less gain and 'vantage, tisfied in-But this I'll assure you, Cob's wife is To have thee more at home; indeed I could. an excellent bawd, sister, and oftentimes your Dame. Your doubts, as well as love, may breed husband haunts her house; marry, to what end these thoughts.
I cannot altogether accuse him. Imagine you, Kite. That jar untunes me.
Aside. what you think convenient. But I have known What dost thou say? Doubt thee!
fair hides have foul hearts ere now, sister. I should as soon suspect myself—No, no,
Dame. Never said you truer than that, brother; My confidence is rooted in thy merit,
so much I can tell you for your learning. O, So fixed and settled, that, wert thou inclined ho! is this the fruit of his jealousy? I thought To masks, to sports, and balls, where lusty youth some game was in the wind, he acted so much Leads up the wanton dance, and the raised pulse tenderness but now; but I'll be quit with him.Beats quicker measures, yet I could with joy, Thomas ! With heart's ease and security-not but I had rather thou should'st prefer thy home,
Enter Casi. And me, to toys and such like vanities.
Fetch your hat, and go with me : I'll get my Dame. But sure, my dear,
| hood, and out the backward-way. I would to
fortune I could take him there! I'd return him his , beauty. What say you, sister? On my soul, he own, I warrant him ! I'd fit him for his jealousy! | loves you; will you give him the meeting?
[Ereunt. Bridg. Faith, I had very little confidence in Well. Ha, ha! so e'en let them go; this may my own constancy, brother, if I durst not meet make sport anon-What, Brain-worm? | a man : but this motion of yours savours of an
old knight adventurer's servant a little too much, Enter BRAIN-WORM.
methinks. Brain. I saw the merchant turn the corner, Well. What's that, sister! and came back to tell you, all goes well ; wind Bridg. Marry, of the go-between. and tide, my master.
Well. No matter if it did; I would be such a Well. But how got'st thou this apparel of the one for my friend. But see, who is returned to justice's man?
hinder us. Brain. Marry, sir, my proper fine penman would needs bestow the grist o'me at the Wind
Enter KITELY. mill, to hear some martial discourse, where I so Kite. What villany is this? Called out on a marshalled him, that I made him drunk with ad false message! This was some plot; I was not miration; and because too much heat was the sent for. Bridget, where's your sister? cause of his distemper, I stript him stark naked, Bridg. I think she be gone forth, sir. as he lay along asleep, and borrowed his suit to Kite. How! is my wife gone forth? Whither, deliver this counterfeit message in, leaving a for Heaven's sake? rusty armour, and an old brown bill, to watch | Bridg. She's gone abroad with Thomas. him 'till my return; which shall be, when I Kite. Abroad with Thomas ! Oh, that villain have pawned his apparel and spent the better
cheats me! part of the money, perhaps.
| He hath discovered all unto my wife; Well. Well, thou art a successful merry knave, Beast that I was to trust him!'Whither, I pray Brain-worm ; his absence will be subject for You, went she? more mirth. I pray thee return to thy young Bridg. I know not, sir. master, and will him to meet me and my sister Well. I'll tell you, brother, whither I suspect Bridget at the Tower instantly; for here, tell
she's gone. him, the house is so stored with jealousy, there Kite. Whither, good brother? is no room for love to stand upright in. We Well. To Cob's house, I believe; but keep my must get our fortunes committed to some large counsel. prison, say: and then the Tower, I know no Kite. I will, I will. To Cob's house ! Does better air, nor where the liberty of the house
she haunt there? may do us more present service. Away. | She's gone on purpose now to cuckold me,
. [Erit Brain. With that lewd rascal, who, to win her favour, Bridg. What, is this the engine, that you told Hath told her all—Why would you let her go? me of? Wbat farther meaning have you in the Well. Because she's not my wife: if she were, plot?
I'd keep her to her tether. Well. That you may know, fair sister-in-law, | Kite. So, so; now 'tis plain. I shall go mad how happy a thing it is to be fair and beautiful." With my misfortunes; now they pour in torBridg. That touches not me, brother.
rents. Well. That's true; that's even the fault of it; I'm bruted by my wife, betrayed by my servant, for, indeed, beauty stands a woman in no stead, Mocked at by my relations, pointed at by my unless it procure her touching-Well, there's a
neighbours, dear and well-respected friend of mine, sister, Despised by myself.—There is nothing left, now, stands very strongly and worthily affected to- | But to revenge myself first, next hang myself; wards you, and hath vowed to inflame whole | And then all my cares will be over. [Exit. bonfires of zeal at his heart, in honour of your Bridg. He storms most loudly; sure you have perfections. I have already engaged my pro- gone too far in this. mise to bring you, where you shall hear him con Well. 'Twill all end right, depend upon it. firm much more. Ned "Kno'well is the man, But let us lose no time; the coast is clear; away, sister. There's no exception against the party; away; the affair is worth it, and cries haste. you are ripe for a husband, and a minute's loss to Bridg. I trust me to your guidance, brother, such an occasion is a great trespass in a wise ) and so fortune for us.
that gentleman his Toledo, because we would
have it dispatched. Enter Matthew and BOBADIL.
Brain. I am content, sir; I will get you the
warrant presently. What is his name, say you? Mat. I WONDER, captain, what they will say | Downright? of my going away? ha!
Mat. Ay, ay, George Downright. Bob. Why, what should they say? but as of a Brain. Well, gentlemen, I will procure you discreet gentleman; quick, wary, respectful of the warrant presently; but who will you have to nature's fair lineaments, and that is all.
serve it? Mat. Why so ! but what can they say of your Mat. That is true, captain, that must be conbeating?
sidered. Bob. A rude part, a touch with soft wood, a Bob. Body of me, I know not ! 'Tis service of kind of gross battery used, lain on strongly, borne danger! most patiently, and that is all. But wherefore Brain. Why, you were best get one of the vardo I wake their remembrance? I was fascinated, lets of the city, a serjeant; I'll appoint you one, by Jupiter ! fascinated; but I will be unwitched, if you please. and revenged by law,
Mut. Will you, sir? Why we can wish no betMat. Do you hear? Is it not best to get a ter. warrant, and have him arrested, and brought be- Bob, We'll leave it to you, sir. fore justice Clement ?
Ereunt Bob, and MAT. Bob. It were not amiss; would we bad it! Brain. This is rare! Now will I go pawn this Mat. Why, here comes his man; let us speak cloak of the justice's man's, at the broker's, for a to him.
varlet's suit, and be the varlet myself, and so get Bob. Agreed. Do you speak.
money on all sides.
[Exit. Enter Brain-worm as FORMAL.
SCENE II.-—The street before Cob's house. Mat. Save you, sir. Brain. With all my heart, sir!
Enter Kno'-WELL. Mat. Sir, there is one Downright hath abused this gentleman and myself, and we determine to Kno. O here it is; I have found it now-Hoa, make ourselves amends by law; now, if you would who is within here? [Tıb appears at the window. do us the favour to procure a warrant to bring Tib. I am within, sir, what is your pleasure ? him before your master, you shall be well consi- Kno. To know who is within besides yourself. dered of, I assure you, sir.
Tib. Why, sir, you are no constable, I hope? Brain. Sir, you know my service is my living; Kno. O, fear you the constable? Then I doubt such favours as these, gotten of my master, is his not you have some guests within deserve that only preferment, and therefore you must consi- | fear-I'll fetch him straight. der me, as I may make benefit of my place.
Tib. For Heaven's sake, sirMat. How is that, sir?
I Kno. Go to, come tell me, is not young Kno'Brain. Faith, sir, the thing is extraordinary, well here? and the gentleman may be of great account. Yet, I Tib. Young Kno'well! I know none such, sir, be what he will, if you will lay me down a brace on my honesty. of angels in my hand, you shall have it ; other- Kno. Your honesty, dame! It flies too lightly wise not.
from you. There is no way but fetch the conMat. How shall we do, captain ? He asks a brace of angels; you have no money?
Tib. The constable; the man is mad, I think. Bob. Not a cross, by fortune. Mat. Nor I, as I am a gentleman, but two
Enter Cash and Dame Kitely. pence left of my two shillings in the morning for Cash. Ioa! who keeps house here? wine and raddish. Let us find him some pawn. Kno. O, this is the female copesmate of my
Bob. Pawn! we have none to the value of his son. Now shall I meet him straight. [Aside. demand.
Dame. Knock, Thomas, hard. Mat. O, yes, I can pawn my ring here.
Cash. Hoa! good wife. Bol. And harkee, he shall have my trusty To Tib. Why, what is the matter with you? ledo too. I believe I shall have no service for it Dame. Why, woman, grieves it you to ope the to-day.
door? Belike you get something to keep it shut. Mat. Do you hear, sir? We have no store of Tib. What mean these questions, pray you? money at this time, but you shall have good Dame. So strange you make it! Is not my hus pawns; look you, sir, I will pledge this ring, and band here!
Kno. Her husband !
[Aside. | Kite. Tut, tut, never speak; I see through every Dame. My tried and faithful husband, Master Veil you cast upon your treachery : but I have Kitely.
| Done with you, and root you from iny heart for Tib. I hope he needs not be tried here.
ever. Dame. Come hither, Cash-I see my turtle For you, sir, thus I demand my honour's due; coming to his haunts; let us retire. [They retire. Resolved to cool your lust, or end my shame. Kno. This must be some device to mock me
Kno. What lunacy is this ! Put up your sword, Soft—who is this !-Oh ! 'tis my son disguised. and undeceive yourself—No arm, that e'er poised I'll watch him and surprise him.
weapon, can affright me. But I pity folly, nor
cope with madness. Enter Kitely, muffled in a cloak.
Kite. I will have proofs I will—so you, good Kite. 'Tis truth, I see; there she skulks. wife-bawd, Cob's wife; and you, that make your But I will fetch her from her hold-I will husband such a monster; and you, young pander, I tremble so, I scarce have power to do the jus- and old cuckold maker, I'll have you every one tice
before the justice-Nay, you shall answer it; I Her infamy demands.
charge you go. Come forth, thou bawd. [As Kitely goes forward, Dame Kıtely TGoes into the house and brings out Tib. and Kno'well lay hold of him.)
Kno. Marry, with all my heart, sir; I go wilKno. Have I trapped you, youth? You cannot
lingly. 'scape me now.
Though I do taste this as a trick upon me, Dame. 0, sir! have I forestalled your honest | To punish my impertinent search ; and justly; market!
| And half forgive my son for the device. Found your close walks! You stand amazed Kite. Come, will you go? Now, do you? Ah, hide, hide your face, for shame! Dame. Go ! to thy shame, believe it. l'faith, I am glad I have found you out at last. Kite. Though shaine and sorrow both my heart What is your jewel, trow? In, come let's see her; betide,
Come on-I must, and will be satisfied. [E.reunt.
SCENE II.-Stocks Market.
feits, till he lays hold upon a debtor, and says, he I see the counterfeit-I am his father, and claim arrests him; for then he brings him to all manhim as my own.
ner of unrest. A kind of little kings we are, Kite. (Discovering himself.] I am your cuck- bearing the diminutive of a mace, made like a old, and claim my vengeance.
young artichoke, that always carries pepper and Dame. What, do you wrong me, and insult me salt in itself. Well, I know not what danger I too?
undergo by this exploit; pray Heaven I come Thou faithless man!
well off! Kite. Out on thy more than strumpet's impudence !
Enter BOBADIL and Master Matthew. Steal'st thou thus to thy haunts? And have 1 Mat. See, I think, yonder is the varlet, by his taken
gown. Save you, friend; are not you here by Thy bawd and thee, and thy companion, appointment of justice Clement's man? This hoary-headed letcher, this old goat,
Brain. Yes, an't please you, sir, he told me Close at your villany, and would'st thou 'scuse it two gentlemen had willed him to procure a warWith this stale harlot's jest, accusing me? rant from his master, which I have about me, to O, old incontinent, dost thou not shame
be served on one Downright. To have a mind so hot; and to entice,
Mat. It is honestly done of you both; and see And feed the enticement of a lustful woman? where the party comes you must arrest. Serve Dame. Out, I defy thee, thou dissembling it upon him quickly, before he be aware
wretch! Kite. Defy me, strumpet! Ask thy pander | Enter Master STEPHEN, in DOWNRIGHT's cloak. here;
Bob. Bear back, master Matthew. Can he deny it, or that wicked elder?
Brain. Master Downright, I arrest you i' the Kno. Why, hear you, sir
queen's name, and must carry you before a jusCash. Master, 'tis in vain to reason, while these tice, by virtue of this warrant. passions blind you—l'ın grieved to see you thus. | Step. Me, friend, I am no Dowinwright, I. I am
Master Stephen; you do not well to arrest me, I SCENE IV.-A hall in Justice CLEMENT's house. tell you truly. I am in nobody's bonds or books, I would you should know it. A plague on you
Enter Clement ,Kno'well, KITELY, Dame heartily, for making me thus afraid before my
KITELY, Tıb, Casu, Cob, and Servants. time.
Clem. Nay, but stay, stay, give me leave. My Brain. Why now are you deceived, gentle chair, sirrah. You, master Kno'well, say you men?
went thither to meet your son. Bob. He wears such a cloak, and that decei Kno. Aye, sir. ved us. But see, here he comes, indeed! this is | Clem. But who directed you thither? he, officer.
Kno. That did mine own man, sir.
Clem. Where is he?
Kno. Nay, I know not now; I left him with Down. Why, how now, Signor Gull! are you your clerk; and appointed him to stay for me. turned filcher of late? Come, deliver up my | Clem. My clerk! About what time was this? cloak.
Kno. Marry, between one and two, as I take Step. Your cloak, sir! I bought it even now in it. open market.
Clem. And what time came my man with the Brain. Master Downright, I have a warrant false message to you, master Kitely? I must serve upon you, procured by these two | Kite. After two, sir. gentleinen.
Clem. Very good : but, Mrs Kitely, how chance Down. These gentlemen! these rascals! it that you were at Cob's? Ha!
Brain. Keep the peace, I charge you, in her Dame. An' please you, sir, I'll tell you. My majesty's name.
| brother Well-bred told me, that Cob's house was Down. I obey thee. What must I do, officer? | a suspected place
Brain. Go before Mr Justice Clement, to an- Clem. So it appears, methinks : but on. ! swer what they can object against you, sir. Il Dame. And that my husband used thither will use you kindly, sir.
daily. Mat. Come, let us before, and make the jus- Clem. No matter, so he used himself well, tice, captain
Erit. mistress. Bob. The varlet is a tall man, before heaven ! Dame. True, sir; but you know what grows
| by such haunts, oftentimes, Down. Gull, you'll gi' me my cloak?
Clem. I see rank fruits of a jealous brain, misStep. Sir, I bought it, and I'll keep it.
tress Kitely. But, did you find your husband Down. You will?
there, in that case, as you suspected ? Step. Aye, that I will.
Kite. I found her there, sir. Down. Officer, there is thy fee, arrest him. Clem. Did you so ? That alters the case. Brain. Master Stephen, I must arrest you. Who gave you knowledge of your wife's being
Step. Arrest me! I scorn it; there, take your there? cloak, I'll none on it.
Kite. Marry, that did my brother Well-bred. Down. Nay, that shall not serve your turn, Clem. How! Well-bred first tell her, than tell now, sir. Officer, I'll go with thee to the justi- you after? Where is Well-bred? ce's. Bring him along.
Kite. Gone with my sister, sir, I know not Step. Why, is not here your cloak? what would / whither. you have?
Clem. Why, this is a mere trick, a device; Down. I'll ha' you answer it, sir.
you are gulled in this most grossly, all! Alas, Brain. Sir, I'll take your sword, and this gen- poor wench, wert thou suspected for this? tleman's too, for his appearance.
Tib. Yes, an' it please you. Down. I'll ha' no words taken. Bring him a Clem. I smell mischief here, plot and contrilong.
vance, master Kitely. However, if you will step Brain. So, so, I have made a fair mash on't. I into the next room with your wife, and think Step. Must I go?
coolly of matters, you'll find some trick has been Brain. I know no remedy, master Stephen. played you-I fear there have been jealousies on
Down. Come along before me here. I do both parts, and the wags have been merry with not love your hanging look behind.
you. Step. Why, sir, I hope you cannot hang me Kite. I begin to feel it-I'll take your counfor it. Can he, fellow?
sel-Will you go in, dame? Brain. I think not sir. It is but a whipping Dame. I will have justice, Mr Kitely. matter, sure!
[Erit KITELY and Dame. Step. Why, then, let him do his worst, I am Clem. You will be a woman, Mrs Kitely, that resolute.
(Exeunt. \ I see-How now, what's the matter?