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you, sir.

Do you conceive as our jennets do, with a west | To such a desolation and discredit, as wind?

Her weakness and your hot will would work My heir will be an errant fleet one, lady.

her to. Mar. You must provide a cradle, and what a Fie, fie, for shame!

trouble's that! Leon. The sea shall rock it;

Enter Perez. Tis the best nurse; 'twill roar and rock to What mask is this now? gether.

More tropes and figures to abuse my sufferance ! A swinging storm will sing you such a lullaby! What cousin's this? Mar. Faith let me stay: I shall but shame Juan. Michael Van Owle, how dost thou?

In what dark barn, or tod of aged ivy, Leon. An you were a thousand shames you Hast thou lain hid? shall along with me:

Per. Things must both ebb and flow, colonel, At home I'm sure you'd prove a million. And people must conceal and shine again. Every rran carries the bundle of his sins You're welcome hither, as your friend may say, Upon bis back: you are mine; I'll sweat for ye. gentlemen;

A pretty house, ye see, handsomely seated, Enter Duke, Alonzo, and Saxcuro.

Sweet and convenient walks, the waters crystal. Duke. What, sir, preparing for your noble Alon. He's certain mad. journey?

Juan. As mad as a French tailor, that Tis well, and full of care.

Has nothing in his head but ends of fustians. I saw your mind was wedded to the war,

Per. I see you're packing now, my gentle And knew you'd prove some good man for your cousin, country;

And my wife told me I should find it so; Therefore, fair cousin, with your gentle pardon, 'Tis true I do : you were merry, when I was last I got this place. What, mourn at his advance

bere : ment!

But 'twas your will to try my patience, madam. You arc to blame; he'll come again, sweet I'm sorry, that my swift occasions cousin :

Can let you take your pleasure here no longer; Meantime, like sad Penelope and sage,

Yet I would have you think, my honoured cousin, Among your maids at home, and housewifely- | This house, and all I have, are all your servants. Leon. No, sir, I dare not leave her to that Leon. What house, what pleasure, sir? what solitariness :

do you mean? She's young, and grief or ill news from those Per. You hold the jest so stiff, 'twill prove quarters

discourteous. May daily cross her : she shall go along, sir. This house I mean; the pleasures of this place. Duke. By no means, captain.

Leon. And what of them? Leon. By all means, an't please ye,

Per. They're mine, sir, and you know it: Duke. What, take a young and tender-bodied My wife's, I mean, and so conferred upon me. lady,

The hangings, sir, I must entreat your servants, And expose her to those dangers, and those That are so busy in their offices, tumults!

Again to minister to their right uses. A sickly lady, too!

I shall take view of the plate anon, and furnitures, Leon. Twill make her well, sir;

That are of under place. You're merry still, There's no such friend to health as wholesome cousin, travel.

And of a pleasant constitution : San. Away, it must not be.

Men of great fortunes make their mirths ad plaAlon, It ought not, sir.

citum. Go hurry her! It is not humane, captain.

Leon. Pr’ythee, good stubborn wife, tell me Duke. I cannot blame her tears -Fright directly: her with tempests,

Good evil wife, leave fooling, and tell me ho With thunder of the war

nestly, I dare swear, if she were able

Is this my kinsman ? Leon. She's most able :

Mar. I can tell ye nothing, And, pray ye, swear not: she must go, there's Leon. I've many kinsmen, but so mad a one, no remedy:

And so fantastic- -all the house? Nor greatness, nor the trick you had to part us, Per. All mine. Which smells tvo rank, too open, too evident, And all within it, I will not bait you an ace on't. Shall hinder ine. Hlad she but ten hours life, Can't you receive a noble courtesy, Nay, less, but two hours, I would have her with And quietly and handsomely as ye ought, cor, me;

But you must ride o' the top on't ? I would not leave her fame to so much ruin, Leon, Canst thou fight?

get it.

Per. I'll tell ye presently: I could have done, To try your jealousy, upon entreaty,

And saving of your wife.
Leon. For you must law and claw before ye Leon. All this not moves me,

Nor stirs my gall, nor alters my affections. Juan, Away, no quarrels.

You have more furniture, more houses, lady, Leon. Now I am more temperate,

And rich ones, too; I will make bold with those; I'll have it prov'd, you were ne'er yet in bedlam; And you have land in the Indies, as I take it ; Never in love, for that's a lunacy ;

Thither we'll go, and view awhile those climates, No great state left ye, that ye never looked for, Visit your factors there, that may betray ye. Nor cannot manage, that's a rank distemper; 'Tis done; we must go. That you were christened, and who answered for Mar. Now thou'rt a brave gentleman; you.

And, by this sacred light, I love thee dearly: And then I yield- Do but look at him.

Hark ye, sir; Per. He has half persuaded me, I was bred i' The house is none of yours; I did but jest, sir ; the moon :

You are no coz of mine; I beseech


vanish. I have ne'er a brush at my breech—Are not we I tell you plain, you have no more right than he both mad?

Has, that senseless thing. Your wife has once And is not this a fantastic house we are in,

more fooled ye, sir. And all a dream we do? Will you walk out? Go ye and consider. And if I do not beat thee presently

Leon. Good-morrow, my sweet Mahound couInto à sound belief as sense can give thee, Brick me into that wall there for a chimney-piece, You are welcome-welcome all-my cousin toom And say, I was one of the Cæsars done by a seal. We are soldiers, and should naturally do for one cutter.

another. Leon. I'll talk no more; come, we'll away Per. By this hand she dies fort, immediately.

Or any man that speaks for her. Mar. Why then the house is his, and all that's These are fine toys.

(Exit PEREZ in it:

Mar. Let me request you stay but one poor I'll give away my skin, but I'll undo ye:

month; I gave it to his wife. You must restore, sir; You shall have a commission, and I'll go, too. And make a new provision.

Give me but will so far. Per. Am I mad, now,

Leon. Well, I will try ye. Or am I christened? You, my pagan cousin, Good-morrow to your grace; we've private busiMy mighty Mahound kinsman, what quirk now? You shall be welcome all. I hope to see, sir, Duke. If I miss thee again, I'm an arrant Your grace here, and my coz: we are all soldiers, bungler. And must do naturally for one another.

Juan. Thou shalt have my command, and I'll Duke. Are you blank at this? Then I must tell march under thee,

Nay, be thy boy, before thou shalt be baffled; Ye've no command; now you may go at pleasure, Thou art so brave a fellow. And ride your ass troop. 'Twas a trick I used Alon. I have seen visions.




ye, sir,


SCENE I.-MARGARITTA's House. And this evening will come to ye, and shew ye Enter Leon, with a letter, and MargarITTA. And offers any thing to get access to you.

jewels, Leon. Come bither, wife. Do you know this if I can make or sport or profit on him, hand?

(For he is fit for both) she bids me use him, Mar. I do, sir ; 'tis Estifania's, that was once And so I will. Be you conformable, and follow my woman.

but my will. Leon. She writes to me here, that one Caca- Mar. I shall not fail, sir. fogo,

Leon. Will the duke come again, do you An usuring jeweller's son, I know the rascal,

think? Is mortally fallen in love with you.

Mar. No, sure, sir. Mar. He is a monster; deliver me from He has now no policy to bring him hither. mountains.

Leon. Nor bring you to him, if my wit hold, Leon. Do you go a birding for all sorts of fair wife. people!

Let's in to dinner,



SCENE II.-A Street.

Per. It is no matter. By a woman cozened,

A real woman!
Enter Perez.

Caca. By a real devil. Per: Had I but lungs enough to bawl suffi- Plague of her jewels, and her copper chains, ciently,

How rank they swell! That all the queans in Christendom might `hcar Per. Sweet, cozened sir, let's see them. me,

I have been cheated, too ; I would have you note That men might run away from the contagion,

that; I had my wish. Would it were made high treason, And lewdly cheated, by a woman also, Most infinite high, for any man to marry;

A scurvy woman. I am undone, sweet sir; I mean, for a man, that would live handsomely, Therefore, I must have leave to laugh. And like a gentleman, in's wits and credit.

Caca. Pray ye, take it; What torments shall I put her to?

You are the merriest undone man in Europe. Cut her in pieces, every piece will live still, What need we fiddles, bawdy songs, and sherry, And every morsel of her will do mischief. When our own miseries can make us merry? They have so many lives, there's no hanging of Per. Ha, ha, ha! them,

I've seen these jewels : what a notable penny. They are too light to drown, they're cork and worth feathers;


had! You will not take, sir,
To burn too cold, they live like salamanders : Some twenty ducats-
Under huge heaps of stones to bury her,

Caca. Thou'rt deceived; I will take-
And so depress her as they did the giants ? Per. To clear your bargain, now.
She will move under more than built old Babel. Caca. I'll take some ten,
I must destroy her.

Some any thing, some half ten, half a ducat.

Per. An excellent lapidary set these stones, Enter CACAFOGO, with a casket.

D'ye mark their waters? Caca. Be cozened by a thing of clouts! a she Caca. Quicksands choak their waters, moth,

And her's that brought them, too! but I shall That every silkman's shop breeds! To be cheated, find her. And of a thousand ducats, by a whim-wham! Per. And so shall I, I hope : but do not hurt Per. Who is he, that's cheated ? Speak again,

her. thou vision !


you had need of cozening, as you may have, But art thou cheated ? Minister some comfort. (For such gross natures will desire it often; Tell me, I conjure thee, art thou cheated brave- 'Tis, at sometimes too, a fine variety) ly?

You cannot find, in all this kingdom, Come, prithee come; art thou so pure a cox- A woman, that can cozen ye so neatly. comb,

She has taken half mine anger off with this trick. To be undone? Do not dissemble with me.


. Caca. Then keep thy circle:

Caca. If I were valiant now, I'd kill this fel For I'm a spirit wild, that lies about thee; And, whosoe'er thou art, if thou be'st human, I've money enough lies by me, at a pinch, I'd let thee plainly know, I'm cheated damnably. To pay for twenty rascals' lives, that vex me. Per. Ha, ha, ha!

I'll to this lady; there I shall be satisfied. Caca. Dost thou laugh? Damnably, I say,

most damnably. Per. By whom, good spirit? Speak, speak! Ha,

SCENE III.-A street. ha, ha! Caca. I'll utter; laugh till thy lungs crack; by

Enter Perez and EstirANIA, meeting. a rascal woman!

Per. Why, how dar’st thou meet me again, A lewd, abominable, and plain woman!

thou rebel, Dost thou laugh still?

And know'st how thou hast used me thrice, thou Per. I must laugh; prithee pardon me,

rascal? I shall laugh terribly.

Were there not ways enough to fly my venCaca. I shall be angry,

geance, Terribly angry; I have cause.

No holes nor vaults to hide thee from fury, Per. That's it;

But thou must meet me face to face to kill thee? And 'tis no reason but thou shouldst be angry, I would not seek thee to destroy thee willingly, Angry at heart; yet I must laugh still at thee. But now thou com'st to invite me, com’st upon By a woman cheated! Art sure it was a woman? Caca. I shall break thy head; my valour How like a sheep-biting rogue, taken in the manitches at thee.







And ready for a halter, dost thou look now? This place is full of charge, and full of hurry; Thou hast a hanging look, thou scurvy thing ! No part of sweetness dwells about these cities. Hast ne'er a knife,

Mar. Whither you will, I wait on your pleNor e'er a string to lead thee to Elysium;

sure; Be there no pitiful 'pothecaries in this town,

Live in a hollow tree, sir, I'll live with ye. That have compassion upon wretched women,

Leon. Ay, now you strike a harmony, a true That dare administer a dram of ratsbane,

one, But thou must fall to me?


your obedience waits upon your husband. Estif. I know you've mercy.

Why, now I doat upon you, love ye dearly; Per. If I had tons of mercy, thou deserv'st And my rough nature falls, like roaring streams,

Clearly and sweetly into your

embraces. What new tricks now a-foot, and what new Oh, what a jewel is a woman excellent, houses

A wise, a virtuous, and a noble woman! Have you in the air? What orchards in appari- When we mect such, we bear our stamps on both tion?

sides, What can’st thou say for thy life?

And through the world we hold our current virEstif. Little or nothing.

tues. I know you'll kill me, and I know 'tis useless Alone, we are single medals, only faces, To beg for mercy. Pray, let me draw my book And wear our fortunes out in useless shadows.

Command you now, out,

and ease me of that trouble ; And pray a little.

I'll be as humble to you as a servant. Per. Do, a very little ;

Bid whom you please, invite your noble friends, For I have a farther business than thy killing. They shall be welcome all, now experience I have money yet to borrow. Speak when you Has bound you fast unto the chain of goodness. are ready.

[Clashing swords, a cry within-Down with their Estif. Now, now sir, now [Shews a pistol.

swords !) Come on. Do you start off from me?

What noise is this? what dismal cry? Do you sweat, great captain? Have you seen a

Mar. 'Tis loud too. spirit?

Sure there's some mischief done in the street; Per. Do you wear guns?

Look out there! Estif. I am a soldier's wife, sir,

Leon. Look out, and help. And by that privilege I may be armed.

Enter a Servant. Now, what's the news ? And let's discourse more friendly,

Ser. Oh, sir, the duke MedinaAnd talk of our affairs in peace.

Leon. What of the duke Medina? Per. Let me see,

Ser. Oh, sweet gentleman ! he's almost slain! Prithee let me see thy gun; 'tis a very pretty

Mar. Away, away, and help him!
All the house help.

[Erit Servant. Estif. No, no, sir, you shall feel.

Leon. How! slain? Why, Margaritta, Per. Hold, hold, ye villain! what, would you Wife, sure some new device they have afoot again, Kill your own husband ?

Some trick upon my credit; I shall meet it. Estif. Let mine own husband, then,

I'd rather guide a ship imperial, Be in his own wits. There, there's a thousand Alone, and in a storm, than rule one woman.

ducats. Who must provide for you? And yet you'll killine!

Enter Duke, Sanchio, ALONZO, aud Servant, Per. I will not hurt thee for ten thousand Mar. How came you hurt, sir? millions.

Duke. I fell out with my friend, the noble coEstif. When will you redeem your jewels? I

lonel. have pawned them,

My cause was naught, for 'twas about your honYou see for what we must keep touch.

our; Per. I'll kiss thee;

And he, that wrongs the innocent, ne'er prospers, And get as many more. I'll make thee famous. And he has left me thus ; for charity, Had we the house now!

Lend me a bed to ease my tortured body, Estif. Come along with me;

That, ere I perish, I may shew

my penitence, If that be vanished, there be more to hire, sir.

I fear I'm slain.
Per. I see I am an ass, when thou art near Leon. Help, gentlemen, to carry him.


There shall be nothing in this house, my lord, SCENE IV.- A chamber.

But as your own.

Duke. I thank ye, noble sir.
Enter Leon and MARGARITTA.

Leon. To bed with him; and, wife, give your Leon. Come, we'll away unto your country

attendance. house,

[Ereunt DUKE, SANCHIO, ALONZO, MARGARITTA, And there we'll learn to live contel..edly.

and servant.






Enter Juay.

By your own nobleness

Leon. Beware, beware-have you no fetch Leon. Afore me, 'Tis rarely counterfeited.

Mar. No, by my repentance, no.
Juan. True, it is so, sir;

Leon. And art thou truly, truly honest?
And take you heed this last blow do not spoil ye. Mar. These tears will shew it.
He is not hurt, only we made a scuffle,

Leon. I take you up, and wear you next my
As though we purposed anger: that same scratch heart;
On's band he took, to colour all, and draw com- See you be worth it.

passion, That he might get into your house more cun

Enter ALTEA. ningly. I must not stay; stand now, and you're a brave Now, what with you? fellow,

Alt. I come to tell my lady, Leon. I thank ye, noble colonel, and I hon- There is a fulsome fellow would fain speak with our ye.

her. Never be quiet?

(Exit Juan. Leon. Tis Cacafogo; keep him from the

duke, Enter MARGARITTA.

The duke from him; anon he'll yield us laugh

ter. Mar. He's most desperate ill, sir;

Alt. Where is it, please you, that we shall deI do not think these ten months will recover him.

tain him? Leon. Does he bire my house to play the fool He seems at war with reason, full of wine.

Leon. To the cellar with him; 'tis the drunkOr does it stand on fairy ground? We're haunt- ard's den,

Fit cover for such beasts. Should he be resty, Are all men and their wives troubled with dreams Say I am at home; unwieldy as he is, thus?

He'll creep into an augre-hole to shun me. Mar. What ail you, sir?

Alt. I'll dispose him there.

(Erit. Leon. Nay, what ail you, sweet wife,

Leon. Now, Margaritta, comes your trial on : To put these daily pastimes on my patience ? The duke expects you; acquit yourself to him; What dost thou see in me, that I should suffer I put you to the test ; you have my trust, this?

My confidence, my love. Mar. Alas, I pity ye.

Mar. I will deserve them.

[Erit. Leon. Thou'lt make me angry ;

Leon. My work is done, and now my heart's at Thou never saw'st me mad yet. Mar. You are always;

I read in every look, she means me fairly;
You carry a kind of bedlam still about ye. And nobly shall my love reward ber for't:
Leon. If thou pursuest me farther, I run stark He, who betrays his rights, the husband's rights,

To pride and wantonness; or who denies
If you have more hurt dukes, or gentlemen, Affection to the heart he has subdued,
To lie here on your cure, I shall be desperate.

Forfeits the claim to manhood and humanity.
I know the trick, and you shall feel I know it;
Are ye so hot, that no hedge can contain ye?
I'll have thce let blood in all the veins about SCENE V.-A chamber. Duke discovered in a

night goun. I'll have thy thoughts found, too, and have them opened,

Duke. Why, now, this is most excellent invenThy spirits purged, for those are they that fire ye.

The maid shall be thy mistress, thou the maid, I shall succeed, spite of this huffing husband.
And all her servile labours thou shalt reach at, I can but smile to think most wary spouses
And go through cheerfully, or else sleep empty:

The soonest are deceived.
That maid shall lie by me, to teach you duty;
You in a pallet by, to humble ye,

And grieve for what you lose, thou foolish, wick-
ed woman.

Who's there, my

love? Mar. I've lost myself, sir,

Mar. 'Tis I, my lord.
And all that was my base self, disobedience : Duke. Are you alone, sweet friend?

[Kneels. Mar. Alone, and come to enquire how your

wounds are. My wantopness, my stubbornness, l've lost too. And now, by that pure good faith good wives Duke. I have none, lady; not a hurt abousare crowned with,

me ;



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