brooding over her like an old hen, as if she were | thoughts; and I was in a sort of dream, that did not well hatched, 'egad, he he! Sir Paul. Good strange! Mr Brisk is such a merry facetious person, he, he, he! No, no, I have done with her; I have done with her now. Brisk. The fiddles have stayed this hour in the hall, and my lord Froth wants a partner; we can never begin without her. Sir Paul. Go, go, child; go, get you gone and dance, and be merry; I will come and look at you by and by. Where is my son Mellefont? Lady Ply. I'll send him to them; I know where he is Brisk. Sir Paul, will you send Careless into the hall, if you meet him. Sir Paul. I will, I will; I'll go and look for him on purpose. [Exeunt all but BRISK. Brisk. So, now, they are all gone, and I have an opportunity to practise-Ah! my dear lady Froth! She's a most engaging creature, if she were not so fond of that damned coxcombly lord of hers; and yet I am forced to allow him wit, too, to keep in with him- -No matter, she's a woman of parts, and 'egad parts will carry her. She said, she would follow me into the galleryNow, to make my approaches-Hem, hem! Ah, a-[Bous]-dam!- Pox on't, why should I disparage my parts by thinking what to say; none but dull rogues think: witty men, like rich fellows, are always ready for all expences, while your blockheads, like poor needy scoundrels, are forced to examine their stock, and forecast the charges of the day. Here she comes; I'll seem not to see her, and, try to win her with a new airy invention of my own-hem! O ye powers! O my lady Froth, my lady Froth! My lady Froth! Heigho! Break heart; gods, I thank you! [Stands musing, with his arms across.] Lady Froth. O heavens, Mr Brisk! What's the matter? in a manner represent a very pleasing object to my imagination; but-but did I, indeed?—To see how love and murder will out. But did I really name my lady Froth? Lady Froth. Three times aloud, as I love letters- -But did you talk of love? O Parnassus ! Who would have thought Mr Brisk could have been in love? ha, ha, ha! O Heavens! I thought you could have no mistress but the nine muses. Brisk. No more I have, 'egad, for I adore them all in your ladyship-Let me perish, I don't know whether to be splenetic or airy upon it; the deuce take me if I can tell whether I am glad or sorry that your ladyship has made the discovery. Lady Froth. O, be merry, by all meansPrince Volscius in love! Ha, ha, ha! Brisk. O, barbarous, to turn me into ridicule ! Yet, ha, ha, ha! The deuce take me, I cannot help laughing myself, ha, ha, ha! yet, by Heavens, I have a violent passion for your ladyship, seriously. Lady Froth. Seriously! Ha, ha, ha! Brisk. Seriously, ha, ha, ha! Gad, I have, for all I laugh. Lady Froth. Ha, ha, ha! What d'ye think I laugh at? Ha, ha, ha! Brisk. Me, 'egad, ha, ha! Lady Froth. No; the deuce take me if I don't laugh at myself; for, hang me if I have not a violent passion for Mr Brisk, ha, ha, ha! Brisk. Seriously? Lady Froth. Seriously, ha, ha, ha! Brisk. That's well enough, let me perish, ha, ha, ha! O miraculous! what a happy discovery! Ah, my dear charming lady Froth! Lady Froth Oh, my adored Mr Brisk! [Embrace. Enter LORD FROTH. Lord Froth. The company are all readyHow now? Brisk. Zoons, madam, there's my lord. [Softly to her. Brisk. My lady Froth! Your ladyship's most Lady Froth. Take no notice; but observe me humble servant-The matter, madam? No--Now, cast off, and meet me at the lower end thing, madam; nothing at all, egad. I was fallen into the most agreeable amusement in the whole province of contemplation: That is all-I'll seem to conceal my passion, and that will look like respect. [Aside. Lady Froth. Bless me! why did you call out upon me so loud? of the room, and then join hands again; I could teach my lord this dance purely; but I vow, Mr Brisk, I can't tell how to come so near any other man. Oh, here's my lord, now you shall see me do it with him. [They pretend to practise part of a country dance. Lord Froth. Oh, I see there's no harm Brisk. O lord! I, madam! I beseech your la-yet-But I don't like this familiarity. [Aside. dyship—When? Lady Froth. Shall you and I do our close Lady Froth. Just now, as I came in-bless | dance, to shew Mr Brisk? me! why, don't you know it? -But did I? Brisk. Not I, let me perish!Strange! I confess your ladyship was in my VOL. II. Lord Froth. No, my dear, do it with him. Lady Froth. I'll do it with him, my lord, when you are out of the way. 2 A [Exeunt. Enter LADY PLYANT and CARELESS. letter-Well, sir Paul, what do you think of your friend Careless? Has he been treacherous, or did you give his insolence a licence to make trial of your wife's suspected virtue? D'ye see here?[Snatches the letter as in anger.] Look, read it! Gad's my life, if I thought it were so, I would this moment renounce all communication with you. Ungrateful monster! Ha? Is it so? Ay, I see it, a plot upon my honour; your guilty cheeks confess it: Oh, where shall wronged virtue fly for reparation! I'll be divorced this instant. Sir Paul. Gads-bud, what shall I say? This is the strangest surprize! Why, I don't know any Lady Ply. O Mr Careless, Mr Careless! I'm thing at all; nor I don't know whether there be ruined, I'm undone ! Care. What's the matter, madam? Lady Ply. O, the unluckiest accident! I'm afraid I shan't live to tell it you. Care. Heaven forbid! What is it? Lady Ply. I'm in such a fright; the strangest quandary and premunire! I'm all over in an universal agitation! I dare swear, every circumstance of me trembles. Oh, your letter, your letter! By an unfortunate mistake, I have given sir Paul your letter instead of his own. Care. That was unlucky. Lady Ply. O, yonder he comes reading of it! for Heaven's sake step in here, and advise me quickly, before he sees. [Exeunt. any thing at all in the world, or no. Lady Ply. I thought I should try you, false man. I, that never dissembled in my life; yet, to make trial of you, pretended to like that monster of iniquity, Careless, and found out that contrivance, to let you see this letter; which, now, I find, was of your own inditing-I do, heathen, I do; see my face no more; I'll be divorced presently. Sir Paul. O strange, what will become of me! I am so amazed, and so overjoyed, so afraid, and so sorry. But, did you give me this letter on purpose, eh? Did you? Lady Ply. Did I? Do you doubt me, Turk, Sir Paul. Hold, stay, I beseech your ladyship— Sir Paul. Why, now, as I hope to be saved, I had no hand in this letter-Nay, hear me, I beseech your ladyship: The devil take me, now, if he did not go beyond my commission—If I desired him to do any more than speak a good word, only just for me-Gads-bud, only for poor sir Paul-I am an Anabaptist, or a Jew, or what you please to call me. Lady Ply. Why, is not here matter of fact? Sir Paul. Ay, but, by your own virtue and continency, the matter of fact is all his own doing. I confess, I had a great desire to have some honours conferred upon me, which lie all in your ladyship's breast, and he being a well-spoken man, I desired him to intercede for me. Enter SIR PAUL, with the letter. Sir Paul. O Providence, what a conspiracy have I discovered!-But let me see to make an end on't [Reads.] Hum After supper, in the wardrobe, by the gallery. If sir Paul should surprize us, I have a commission from him to treat with you about the very matter of fact.'Matter of fact! Very pretty; it seems, then, I am conducing to my cuckoldom; why, this is a very traiterous position of taking up arms by my authority against my person! Well, let me see'Till then, I languish in expectation of my ador'ed charmer. Dying NED CARELESS.' Gads-bud, would that were matter of fact, too! Die and be damned, for a Judas Maccabeus and Iscariot both! O friendship, what art thou but a name! Henceforward, let no man make a friend that would not be a cuckold: for, whomsoever he receives into his bosom, will find the way to his bed, and there return his caresses, with interest, to his wife. Have I approached the marriage-bed with reverence, as to a sacred shrine, and must I now find it polluted by foreign ini-'egad, I have said all I could, but cannot prevail quity? O my lady Plyant, you were chaste as ice; but you are melted now, and false as water.But Providence has been constant to me in discovering this conspiracy; still I am beholden to Providence; if it were not for Providence, sure, poor sir Paul, thy heart would break. Lady Ply. Did you so? Presumption! [Exit. Enter CARELESS. Care. Sir Paul, I am glad I have met with you; Then, my friendship to you has carried me a little further in this matter Sir Paul. Indeed—Well, sir—I'll dissemble with him a little. [Aside. Care. Why, faith, I have, in my time, known honest gentlemen abused by a pretended coyness in their wives, and I had a mind to try my lady's virtue-And, when I could not prevail for you, Lady Ply. So, sir, I see you have read the 'egad, I pretended to be in love myself-but all Enter LADY PLYANT. in vain, she would not hear a word upon that subject; then, I writ a letter to her; I don't know what effects that will have, but I'll be sure to tell you, when I do; though, by this light, I believe her virtue is impregnable. Mask. I am sorry, my lord, I cannot make you an answer; this is an occasion, in which I would not willmgly be silent. Lord Touch, I know you would excuse himAnd I know as well that you cannot. Mask. Indeed, I was in hopes it had been but Sir Paul. O Providence! Providence! What discoveries are here made! Why, this is better, | a youthful heat, that might have soon boiled over; and more miraculous than the rest. Care. What do you mean? Sir Paul. I cannot tell you, I am so overjoyed; come along with me to my lady; I cannot contain myself; come, my dear friend. Care. So, so, so, this difficulty's over. [Aside. [Excunt. Enter MELLEFONT and MASKWELL, from different doors. Mel. Maskwell, I have been looking for youIt is within a quarter of eight. Mask. My lady is just gone into my lord's closet; you had best steal into her chamber before she comes, and lie concealed there; otherwise, she may lock the door when we are together, and you not easily get in to surprize us. · Mel. Ha? You say true. Mask. You had best make haste; for, after she has made some apology to the company for her own and my lord's absence all this while, she'll retire to her chamber instantly, Mel. I go this moment: Now, Fortune, I defy thee. [Exit. Mask. I confess, you may be allowed to be secure in your own opinion; the appearance is very fair; but I have an after-game to play, that shall turn the tables; and here comes the man that I must manage. Enter LonD TOUCHWOOD. Lord Touch. Maskwell, you are the man I wished to meet. Mask. I am happy to be in the way of your lordship's commands. Lord Touch. I have always found you prudent and careful in any thing, that has concerned me or my family. Mask. I were a villain else--I am bound by duty and gratitude, and my own inclination, to be ever your lordship's servant. Lord Touch. Enough- -You are my friend; I know it: Yet there has been a thing in your knowledge, which has concerned me nearly, that you have concealed from me. Mask. My lord! Lord Touch. Nay, I excuse your friendship to my unnatural nephew thus far-But, I know, you have been privy to his impious designs upon my wife. This evening, she has told me all: her good-nature concealed it as long as was possible; but, he perseveres so in villainy, that she has told me even you were weary of dissuading him, though you have once actually hindered him from forcing her. but Lord Touch. Say on. Mask. I have nothing more to say, my lordbut to express my concern; for I think his frenzy increases daily. Lord Touch. How! give me but proof of it, ocular proof, that I may justify my dealing with him to the world, and share my fortunes. Mask. O, my lord! consider that is hard: besides, time may work upon him: then, for me to do it! I have professed an everlasting friendship to him. Lord Touch. He is your friend, and what am I? Mask. I am answered. Lord Touch. Fear not his displeasure; I will put you out of his and Fortune's power; and for that thou art scrupulously honest, I will secure thy fidelity to him, and give my honour never to own any discovery that you shall make me. Can you give me a demonstrative proof? Speak. Mask. I wish I could not- -To be plain, my lord, I intended this evening to have tried all arguments to dissuade him from a design, which I suspect; and, if I had not succeeded, to have informed your lordship of what I knew. Lord Touch, I thank you. What is the villain's purpose? Mask. He has owned nothing to me of late, and, what I mean now, is only a bare suspicion of my own. If your lordship will meet me a quarter of an hour hence, there, in that lobby, by my lady's bed-chamber, I shall be able to tell you more. Lord Touch. I will. Mask. My duty to your lordship makes me do a severe piece of justice. Lord Touch. I will be secret, and reward your honesty beyond your hopes. [Exeunt. SCENE II. opening, shews LADY TOUCHWOOD'S chamber, MELLEFONT solus. Mel. Pray Heaven my aunt keep touch with her assignation.-Oh, that her lord were but sweating behind this hanging, with the expectation of what I shall see-Hist, she comesLittle does she think what a mine is just ready to spring under her feet. But, to my post. [Goes behind the hangings. Enter LADY TOUCHWOOD. Lady Touch. 'Tis eight o'clock: methinks, I should have found him here--Who does not prevent the hour of love, outstays the time; for, to be duly punctual, is too slow.-I was accusing | fall, fall a little, thou swelling heart; let me have you of neglect. some intermission of this rage, and one minute's coolness to dissemble. [She weeps. Enter MASKWELL,-MELLEFONT absconding, Mask. I confess, you do reproach me, when I see you here before me; but, 'tis fit I should be still behind-hand, still to be more and more indebted to your goodness. Lady Touch. You can excuse a fault too well, not to have been to blame-A ready answer shews you were prepared. Mask. Guilt is ever at a loss, and confusion waits upon it; when innocence and bold truth are always ready for expression Lady Touch. Not in love; words are the weak support of cold indifference; love has no language to be heard. Mel. You have been to blame-I like those tears, and hope they are of the purest kind-penitential tears. Lady Touch. Oh, the scene was shifted quick before me-I had not time to think-I was surprised to see a monster in the glass, and now I find 'tis myself: can you have mercy to forgive the faults I have imagined, but never put in practice? Oh, consider, consider how fatal you have been to me, you have already killed the quiet of this life. The love of you was the first wandering fire that e'er misled my steps, and while I had only that in view, I was betrayed into unthoughtof ways of ruin. Mel. May I believe this true? Musk. Excess of joy has made me stupid! Thus, may my lips be ever closed. [Kisses her.] Lady Touch. Oh, be not cruelly incredulous! And thus--Oh, who would not lose his speech How can you doubt these streaming eyes? Keep upon condition to have joys above it! the severest eye over all my future conduct, and, Lady Touch. Hold, let me lock the door first.if I once relapse, let me not hope forgiveness! [Goes to the door. 'twill ever be in your power to ruin me-my lord Mask. [Aside.] That I believed; 'twas well I shall sign to your desires; I will myself create left the private passage open. your happiness, and Cynthia shall be this night Lady Touch. So, that's safe. your bride-do but conceal my failings, and for Mask. And so may all your pleasures be, and give. secret as this kiss ed! Mel. Upon such terms, I will be ever yours in Mel. And may all treachery be thus discover-every honest way. Lady Touch. Ah! Mel. Villain! [Runs out. Mel. Say you so? were you provided for an escape? Hold, madam, you have no more holes to your burrow; I stand between you and this sally-port. Lady Touch. Thunder strike thee dead for this deceit, immediate lightning blast thee, me, and the whole word!----Oh! I could rack myself, play the vulture to my own heart, and gnaw it, piece-meal, for not boding to me this misfortune. Mel. Be patient Lady Touch. Be damned. Mel. Consider, I have you on the hook; you will but flounder yourself a weary, and be, nevertheless, my prisoner. Lady Touch. I'll hold my breath and die, but I'll be free. Mel. O madam, have a care of dying unprepared; I doubt that you have some unrepented sins that may hang heavy, and retard your flight. Lady Touch. Oh! what shall I do? say? Whither shall I turn? Has hell no remedy? Mel. None. Hell has served you even as Heaven has done, left you to yourself.---You are in a kind of Erasmus paradise; yet, if you please, you may make it a purgatory; and, with a little penance and my absolution, all this may turn to a good account. Lady Touch, [Aside.] Hold in my passion, and MASKWELL Softly introduces LORD TOUCHWOOD, and retires. Mask. I have kept my word; he is here, but I must not be seen. Lord Touch. Hell and amazement! She is in Mel. By Heaven, 'twere senseless not to be, and you are running horn-mad after your fortune, mad, and see such witchcraft. Lady Touch. My lord, you hear him, he talks idly. [As she is going, she turns back and smiles at him. Lord Touch. I fear he's mad, indeed-let's Lord Touch. Hence from my sight, thou living | send Maskwell to him. infamy to my name! when next I see that face, I'll write villain in it with my sword's point. Mel. Now, by my soul, I will not go, till I have made known my wrongs-nay, till I have made known yours, which (if possible) are greater -though she has all the host of hell her servants! Lady Touch. Alas, he raves! For Heaven's sake, away, my lord! he'll either tempt you to extravagance, or commit some himself. Mel. Death and furies! will you not hear me? why, by Heaven, she laughs, grins, points to your back; she forks out cuckoldom with her fingers, SCENE I. [Exeunt LORD and LADY TOUCHWOOD. Mel. Send him to her. Oh, I could curse my stars, fate, and chance; all causes and accidents of fortune in this life! but to what purpose? They talk of sending Maskwell to me; I never had more need of him-but what can he do? imagination cannot form a fairer and more plausible design, than this of his, which has miscarried-O my precious aunt! I shall never thrive without I deal with the devil, or another woman, Women, like flames, have a destroying power, Ne'er to be quenched, till they themselves de[Exit. ACT V. Enter LADY TOUCHWOOD and MASKWELL. Lady Touch. Was it not lucky? Mask. Lucky! fortune is your own, and 'tis her interest so to be; by Heaven, I believe you can controul her power, and she fears it; though chance brought my lord, 'twas your own art that turned it to advantage. Lady Touch. 'Tis true, it might have been my ruin-but yonder's my lord; I believe he is coming to find you; I'll not be seen. [Exit. Mask. So; I durst not own my introducing my lord, though it succeeded well for her, for she would have suspected a design, which I should have been puzzled to excuse. My lord is thoughtful-I'll be so, too; yet he shall know my thoughts; or think he does Enter LORD TOUCHWOOD. What have I done? Lord Touch. Talking to himself! Mask. 'Twas honest, and shall I be rewarded for it? No, 'twas honest, therefore I shall not: nay, rather, therefore, I ought not; for it rewards itself. Lord Touch. Unequalled virtue ! [Aside. Mask. But should it be known! then I have lost a friend! He was an ill man, and I have gained; for half myself I lent him, and that I have recalled; so, I have served myself, and, what is yet better, I have served a worthy lord, to whom I owe myself, Lord Touch. Excellent man! [Aside. Mask. Yet I am wretched-Oh, there is a secret burns within this breast, which, should it once blaze forth, would ruin all, consume my honest character, and brand me with the name of villain. vour, Lord Touch. Ha! Mask. Why do I love! Yet Heaven, and my waking conscience, are my witnesses, I never gave one working thought a vent, which might discover that I loved, nor ever must; no, let it prey upon my heart; for I would rather die than seem once, barely seem, once dishonest: Oh, should it once be known I love fair Cynthia, all this, that I have done, would look like rival's malice, false friendship to my lord, and base self-interest. Let me perish first, and from this hour avoid all sight and speech, and, if I can, all thought of that pernicious beauty. Ha! but what is my distraction doing? I am wildly talking to myself, and some ill chance might have directed malicious ears this way. [Seems to start, seeing my lord. Lord Touch. Start not-let guilty and dishonest souls start at the revolution of their thoughts, but be thou fixed, as is thy virtue. Mask. I am confounded, and beg your lordship's pardon for those free discourses which I have had with myself. Lord Touch. Čome, I beg your pardon that I overheard you, and yet it shall not need-honest Maskwell! thy, and my good genius, led me hither-mine, in that I have discovered so much manly virtue; thine, in that thou shalt have due reward of all thy worth. Give me thy handmy nephew is the alone remaining branch of all our ancient family; him I thus blow away, and constitute thee, in his room, to be my heir Mask. Now, Heaven forbid Lord Touch. No more--I have resolved--the writings are ready drawn, and wanted nothing but to be signed, and have his name insertedyours will fill the blank as well---I will have no reply--let me command this time, for 'tis the last in which I will assume authority---hereafter, you shall rule where I have power. |