At Hester's suit, the persecuting sword 75 Was sheathed, and Israel lived to bless the Lord. These weighty motives, January the sage Maturely pondered in his riper age; And charmed with virtuous joys, and sober life, Would try that Christian comfort called a wife. 80 His friends were summoned on a point so nice, "My friends," he cried, (and cast a mournful look 85 Around the room, and sighed before he spoke), "Beneath the weight of threescore years I bend, And, worn with cares, am hastening to my end; How I have lived, alas! you know too well, In worldly follies, which I blush to tell; But gracious Heaven has oped my eyes at last, With due regret I view my vices past, And, as the precept of the church decrees, Will take a wife, and live in holy ease. But since by counsel all things should be done, And many heads are wiser still than one, Choose you for me, who best shall be content When my desire's approved by your consent. 90 95 "One caution yet is needful to be told, To guide your choice; this wife must not be ICO old: There goes a saying, and 'twas shrewdly said, 'Old fish at table, but young flesh in bed.' My soul abhors the tasteless, dry embrace, Of a stale virgin with a winter face: In that cold season Love but treats his guest 105 With bean-straw, and tough forage at the best. No crafty widows shall approach my bed; But young and tender virgins, ruled with ease, We form like wax, and mould them as we please. "Conceive me, sirs, nor take my sense amiss; 'Tis what concerns my soul's eternal bliss ; Since if I found no pleasure in my spouse, 115 As flesh is frail, and who (God help me) knows? Then should I live in lewd adultery, And sink downright to Satan when I die. divine, 125 May live like saints, by Heaven's consent and mine. "And since I speak of wedlock, let me say, (As, thank my stars, in modest truth I may), My limbs are active, still I'm sound at heart, And a new vigour springs in every part. Think not my virtue lost, though time has shed 130 These reverend honours on my hoary head: Thus trees are crowned with blossoms white as snow, The vital sap then rising from below. Old as I am, my lusty limbs appear 135 Like winter greens, that flourish all the year. Now, sirs, you know to what I stand inclined, Let every friend with freedom speak his mind." He said; the rest in different parts divide; The knotty point was urged on either side: 140 Marriage, the theme on which they all declaimed, Some praised with wit, and some with reason blamed. Till, what with proofs, objections, and replies, Each wondrous positive, and wondrous wise, There fell between his brothers a debate, Placebo this was called, and Justin that. 145 First to the knight Placebo thus begun, (Mild were his looks, and pleasing was his tone): "Such prudence, sir, in all your words appears, As plainly proves, experience dwells with years! Yet you pursue sage Solomon's advice, 151 To work by counsel when affairs are nice : But, with the wise man's leave, I must protest, So may my soul arrive at ease and rest, As still I hold your old advice the best. 155 "Sir, I have lived a courtier all my days, And studied men, their manners, and their ways; And have observed this useful maxim still, To let my betters always have their will. Nay, if my lord affirmed that black was white, My word was this, 'Your honour's in the right.' 161 The assuming wit, who deems himself so wise, As his mistaken patron to advise, 165 Let him not dare to vent his dangerous thought, 171 At least, your courage all the world must praise, 180 "A heathen author, of the first degree, Who, though not faith, had sense as well as we, Bids us be certain our concerns to trust To those of generous principles, and just. The venture's greater, I'll presume to say, To give your person, than your goods away : And therefore, sir, as you regard your rest, First learn your lady's qualities, at least; 185 Whether she's chaste or rampant, proud or civil, Meek as a saint, or haughty as the devil; Whether an easy, fond, familiar fool, Or such a wit as no man e'er can rule. 'Tis true, perfection none must hope to find 199 In all this world, much less in woman-l -kind; But if her virtues prove the larger share, Bless the kind fates, and think your fortune rare. Ah, gentle sir, take warning of a friend, mend; 195 And, spite of all his praises, must declare, tear, And sigh in silence, lest the world should hear; While all my friends applaud my blissful life, And swear no mortal's happier in a wife; Demure and chaste as any vestal nun, The meekest creature that beholds the sun! 201 But, by the immortal powers, I feel the pain, 210 215 "Tis well, 'tis wondrous well, (the knight replies,) Most worthy kinsman, 'faith you're mighty wise! We, sirs, are fools; and must resign the cause To heathenish authors, proverbs, and old saws. (He spoke with scorn, and turned another way,) 220 What does my friend, my dear Placebo, say?" "I say, (quoth he,) by Heaven the man's to blame, 225 To slander wives, and wedlock's holy name." Who now but January exults with joy? 230 And reigned the short-lived tyrant of his breast; |