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clepeth a calf, cauf; half, hauf; neighbour, vocatur, as it were, I have acquainted you withal, to the end nebour; neigh, abbreviated, ne: This is abhomina- to crave your assistance. ble, (which he would call abominable,) it insinuateth Hol. Sir, you shall present before her the nine worme of insanie; Ne intelligis domine? to make fran-thies.-Sir Nathaniel, as concerning some entertaintic, lunatic. ment of time, some show in the posterior of this day, to be rendered by our assistance,-the king's com

Nath. Laus deo, bone intelligo.

Hol. Bone?-bone, for bene: Priscian a little mand, and this most gallant, illustrate, and learned scratch'd; 'twill serve.

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Hol. Quare Chirra, not sirrah?

gentleman, before the princess; I say, none so fit as to present the nine worthies.

Nath. Where will you find men worthy enough to present them?

Hol. Joshua, yourself; myself, or this gallant gen[To Moth. tleman, Judas Maccabæus; this swain, because of his great limb or joint, shall pass Pompey the great; the page, Hercules.

Arm. Men of peace, well encounter'd. Hol. Most military sir, salutation. Moth. They have been at a great feast of languages, and stolen the scraps. [To Costard aside. Cost. O, they have lived long in the alms-basket of words! I marvel, thy master hath not eaten thee for a word; for thou art not so long by the head as honorificabilitudinitatibus: thou art easier swallowed than a flap-dragon.

Moth. Peace; the peal begins.

Arm. Monsieur, [To Hol.] are you not letter'd? Moth. Yes, yes; he teaches boys the hornbook What is a, b, spelt backward, with a horn on his head?

Hol. Ba, pueritia, with a horn added.

Moth. Ba, most silly sheep, with a horn :-You

hear his learning.

Hol. Quis, quis, thou consonant?

Arm. Pardon, sir, error: he is not quantity enough for that worthy's thumb: he is not so big as the end of his club.

Hol. Shall I have audience? he shall present Hercules in minority; his enter and exit shall be strangling a snake; and I will have an apology for that purpose.

Moth. An excellent device! so, if any of the audience hiss, you may cry well done, Hercules! now thou crushest the snake! that is the way to make an offence gracious; though few have the grace to do it, Arm. For the rest of the worthies? Hol. I will play three myself. Moth. Thrice-worthy gentleman! Arm. Shall I tell you a thing? Hol. We attend.

Arm. We will have, if this fadge not, an antic. I

Moth. The third of the five vowels, if you repeat beseech you, follow. them; or the fifth if I.

Hol. I will repeat them, a, e, i.

Moth. The sheep: the other two concludes it; o, u, Arm. Now, by the salt wave of the Mediterraneum, a sweet touch, a quick venew of wit: snip, snap, quick and home; it rejoiceth my intellect: true wit. Moth. Offer'd by a child to an old man; which is wit-old.

Hol. What is the figure? what is the figure?
Moth. Horns.

Hol. Via, goodman Dull! thou hast spoken no word all this while.

Dull, Nor understood none neither, sir.
Hol. Allons! we will employ thee.

Dull. I'll make one in a dance, or so : or I will play on the tabor to the worthies, and let them dance the hay.

Hol. Most dull, honest Dull, to our sport away.


Hol. Thou disputest like an infant: go, whip thy SCENE II. Another Part of the same. Before the


Moth. Lend me your horn to make one, and I will whip about your infamy circum, circa; A gig of a cuckold's horn!

Cost. An I had but one penny in the world, thou shouldst have it to buy gingerbread: hold, there is the very remuneration I had of thy master, thou halfpenny purse of wit, thou pigeon-egg of discretion. O, an the heavens were so pleased, that thou wert but my bastard! what a joyful father wouldst thou make me! Go to; thou hast it ad dunghill, at the fingers' ends, as they say.

Hol. O, I smell false Latin; dunghill for unguem. Arm. Arts-man, præambula; we will be singled from the barbarous. Do you not educate youth at the charge-house on the top of the mountain? Hol. Or, mons, the hill,"

Arm. At your sweet pleasure, for the mountain.
Hol. I do, sans question.

Arm. Sir, it is the king's most sweet pleasure and affection, to congratulate the princess at her pavilion, in the posteriors of this day; which the rude multitude call the afternoon.

Hol, The posterior of the day, most generous sir, is liable, congruent, and measurable for the afternoon : the word is well cull'd, chose; sweet and apt, I do assure you, sir, I do assure.

Arm. Sir, the king is a noble gentleman; and my familiar, I do assure you, very good friend :-For what is inward between us, let it pass :-I do beseech thee, remember thy courtesy ;-I beseech thee, apparel thy head; and among other importunate and most serious designs,-and of great import, indeed, too;but let that pass :-for I must tell thee, it will please his grace (by the world) sometime to lean upon my poor shoulder; and with his royal finger, thus, dally with my excrement, with my mustachio: but sweet heart, let that pass. By the world, I recount no fable; some certain special honours it pleaseth his greatness to impart to Armado, a soldier, a man of travel, that hath seen the world: but let that pass.-The very all of all is,-but, sweet heart, I do implore secrecy, that the king would have me present the princess, sweet chuck, with some delightful ostentation, or show, or pageant, or antic, or firework. Now, understanding that the curate and your sweet self, are good at such eruptions, and sudden breaking out of mirth,

Princess's Pavilion.

Enter the Princess, Katharine, Rosaline, and Maria. Prin. Sweet hearts, we shall be rich ere we depart, If fairings come thus plentifully in: A lady wall'd about with diamonds!Look you, what I have from the loving king. Ros. Madam, came nothing else along with that? Prin. Nothing but this? yes, as much love in rhyme As would be cramm'd up in a sheet of paper, Writ on both sides the leaf, margent and all; That he was fain to seal on Cupid's name. Ros. That was the way to make his godhead wax; For he hath been five thousand years a boy. Kath. Ay, and a shrewd unhappy gallows too. Ros. You'll ne'er be friends with him; he kill'a your sister.

Kath. He made her melancholy, sad, and heavy; And so she died: had she been light, like you, Of such a merry, nimble, stirring spirit, She might have been a grandam ere she died: And so may you; for a light heart lives long.

Ros. What's your dark meaning, mouse, of this light Kath. A light condition in a beauty dark. [word! Ros. We need more light to find your meaning out. Kath. You'll mar the fight, by taking it in snuff; Therefore I'll darkly end the argument.

Ros. Look, what you do, you do it still i'the dark. Kath. So do not you; for you are a light wench. Ros. Indeed, I weigh not you; and therefore light. Kath. You weigh me not,-O, that's you care not

for me.

Ros. Great reason; for, Past cure is still past care. Prin. Well bandied both; a set of wit well play'd. But Rosaline, you have a favour too : Who sent it? and what is it?


I would, you knew: An if my face were but as fair as yours, My favour were as great; be witness this. Nay, I have verses too, I thank Biron: The numbers true; and, were the numb'ring too, I were the fairest goddess on the ground; I am compar'd to twenty thousand fairs. O, he hath drawn my picture in his letter! Prin. Any thing like?

Ros. Much, in the letters; nothing in the praise. Prin. Beauteous as ink; a good conclusion.

Kath. Fair as a text Bin a copy-book. Ros. 'Ware pencils! How let me not die your My red dominical, my golden letter. [debtor. O, that your face were not so full of O's! Kath. A pox o'that jest! and beshrew all shrows! Prin. But what was sent to you from fair Dumain? Kath. Madam, this glove, Prin.

Did he not send you twain?
Kath. Yes, madam; and moreover,
Some thousand verses of a faithful lover:
A huge translation of hypocrisy,
Vilely compil'd, profound simplicity.
Mar. This, and these pearls, to me sent Longaville;
The letter is too long by half a mile.
Prin. I think no less: Dost thou not wish in heart,
The chain were longer, and the letter short?
Mar. Ay, or I would these hands might never part.
Prin. We are wise girls, to mock our lovers so.
Ros. They are worse fools to purchase mocking so.
That same Biron I'll torture ere I go.

O, that I knew he were but in by the week!
How I would make him fawn, and beg, and seek;
And wait the season, and observe the times,
And spend his prodigal wits in bootless rhymes;
And shape his service wholly to my behests;
And make him proud to make me proud that jests!
So portent-like would I o'ersway his state,
That he should be my fool, and I his fate. [catch'd,
Prin. None are so surely caught, when they are
As wit turn'd fool folly, in wisdom hatch d,
Hath wisdom's warrant, and the help of school;
And wit's own grace to grace a learned fool.
Ros. The blood of youth burns not with such excess,
As gravity's revolt to wantonness.

Mar. Folly in fools bears not so strong a note,
As foolery in the wise, when wit doth dote;
Since all the power thereof it doth apply,
To prove, by wit, worth in simplicity.

Enter Boyet.

Prin. Here comes Boyet, and mirth is in his face.
Boyet. O, I am stabb'd with laughter! Where's her
Prin. Thy news, Boyet?
Prepare, madam, prepare !--
Arm, wenches, arm; encounters mounted are
Against your peace: Love doth approach disguis'd,
Armed in arguments; you'll be surpris'd:
Muster your wits; stand in your own defence;
Or hide your heads like cowards, and fly hence.
Prin. Saint Dennis to saint Cupid! What are they,
That charge their breath against us? say, scont, say.
Boyet. Under the cool shade of a sycamore,

I thought to close mine eyes some half an hour:
When, lo! to interrupt my purpos'd rest,
Toward that shade I might behold addrest
The king and his companions: warily

I stole into a neighbour thicket by,
And overheard what you shall overhear;
That, by and by, disguis'd, they will be here.
Their herald is a pretty knavish page,
That well by heart hath conn'd his embassage:
Action, and accent, did they teach him there;
Thus must thou speak, and thus thy body bear:
And ever and anon they made a doubt,
Presence majestical would put him out:
For, quoth the king, an angel shalt thou see;
Yet fear not thou, but speak audaciously.
The boy replied, An angel is not evil;

I should have fear'd her, had she been a devil.
With that all laugh'd,and clapp'd him on the shoulder;
Making the bold wag by their praises bolder.
One rubb'd his elbow, thus; and fleer'd, and swore,
A better speech was never spoke before:
Another, with his finger and his thumb,
Cry'd, Via! we will do't, come what will come :
The third he caper'd, and cry'd, All goes well:
The fourth turn'd on the toe, and down he fell.
With that, they all did tumble on the ground,
With such a zealous laughter, so profound,
That in this spleen ridiculous appears,
To check their folly, passion's solemn tears.

Prin. But what, but what, come they to visit us?
Boyet. They do, they do; and are apparel'd thus,
Like Muscovites, or Russians: as I guess,
Their purpose is, to parle, to court, and dance:
And every one his love-feat will advance
Unto his several mistress; which they'll know
By favours several, which they did bestow.
Prin. And will they so? the gallants shall
For, ladies, we will every one be mask'd;

And not a man of them shall have the grace,
Despite of suit, to see a lady's face.-
Hold, Rosaline, this favour thou shalt wear;
And then the king will court thee for his dear;
Hold, take thou this, my sweet, and give me thine;
So shall Biron take me for Rosaline.-
And change you favours too; so shall your loves
Woo contrary, deceiv'd by these removes.

Ros. Come on then; wear the favours most in sight.
Kath. But, in this changing, what is your intent?
Prin. The effect of my intent is, to cross theirs :
They do it but in mocking merriment:
And mock for mock is only my intent.
Their several counsels they unbosom shall
To loves mistook; and so be mock'd withal,
Upon the next occasion that we meet,
With visages display'd, to talk, and greet.

Ros. But shall we dance, if they desire us to't? Prin. No; to the death, we will not move a foot: Nor to their penn'd speech render we no grace; But while 'tis spoke, each turn away her face. Boyet. Why, that contempt will kill the speaker's heart,

And quite divorce his memory from his part.

Prin. Therefore I do it; and, I make no doubt, The rest will ne'er come in, if he be out. There's no such sport, as sport by sport o'erthrown; To make theirs ours, and ours none but our own: So shall we stay, mocking intended game; And they, well mock'd, depart away with shame. [Trumpets sound within. Boyet. The trumpet sounds; be mask'd, the maskers [The Ladies mask.


Enter the King, Biron, Longaville, and Dumain, in Russian Habits, and masked; Moth, Musicians, and Attendants.

Moth. All hail! the richest beauties on the earth!
Boyet. Beauties no richer than rich taffata.
Moth. A holy parcel of the fairest dames,

[The Ladies turn their Backs to him.
That ever turn'd their-backs-to mortal views!
Biron. Their eyes, villain, their eyes.
Moth. That ever turn'd their eyes to mortal views!

Boyet. True; out, indeed.

Moth. Out of your favours, heavenly spirits, vouchNot to behold

Biron. Once to behold, rogue.
Moth. Once to behold with your sun-beamed eyes,

with your sun-beamed eyes-


Boyet. They will not answer to that epithet; You were best call it, daughter-beamed eyes. Moth. They do not mark me, and that brings me out. Biron. Is this your perfectness! be gone, you rogue. Ros. What would these strangers? know their minds, If they do speak our language, 'tis our will [Boyet: That some plain man recount their purposes: Know what they would.

Boyet. What would you with the princess? Biron. Nothing but peace, and gentle visitation. Ros. What would they, say they?

Boyet. Nothing but peace, and gentle visitation. Ros. Why, that they have; and bid them so be gone. Boyet. She says, you have it, and you may be gone. King. Say to her, we have measur'd many miles, To tread a measure with you on this grass. Boyet. They say, that they have measur'd many a To tread a measure with you on this grass. Ros. It is not so: ask them how many inches. Is in one mile if they have measur'd many, The measure then of one is easily told.


Boyet. If, to come hither, you have measur'd miles, And many miles; the princess bids you tell, How many inches do fill up one mile.

Biron Tell her, we measure them by weary steps. Boyet. She hears herself.


How many weary steps,
Of many weary miles you have o'ergone,
Are number'd in the travel of one mile?
Biron. We number nothing that we spend for you;
Our duty is so rich, so infinite,

That we may do it still without accompt.
Vouchsafe to show the sunshine of your face,
That we, like savages, may worship it.

Ros. My face is but a moon, and clouded too. King. Blessed are clouds, to do as such clouds do! Vouchsafe, bright moon, and these thy stars, to shine be (These clonds remov'd,) upon our wat'ry eyne.

Ros. O vain petitioner! beg a greater matter; Thou now request'st but moonshine in the water.

King. Then, in our measure do bat vouchsafe one change :

Thou bid'st me beg: this begging is not strange. Ros. Play, music, then: nay, you must do it soon. [Music plays. Not yet;-no dance :-thus change I like the moon. King. Will you not dance? How come you thus [chang'd. estrang'd? Ros. You took the moon at full; but now she's King. Yet still she is the moon, and I the man. The music plays; vouchsafe some motion to it. Ros. Our ears vouchsafe it. King. But your legs should do it. Ros. Since you are strangers, and come here by chance,

We'll not be nice: take hands ;-we will not dance. King. Why take we hands then?


Only to part friends: Court'sy, sweet hearts; and so the measure ends. King. More measure of this measure; be not nice. Ros. We can afford no more at such a price. King. Prize you yourselves; What buys your company?

Ros. Your absence only.


That can never be.

Ros. Then cannot we be bought and so adieu; Twice to your visor, and half once to you!

King. If you deny to dance, let's hold more chat. Ros. In private then. King. I am best pleas'd with that. [They converse apart. Biron. White-handed mistress, one sweet word with thee.

Prin. Honey, and milk, and sugar; there is three. Biron. Nay then, two treys, (an if you grow so nice), Metheglin, wort, and malmsey ;-Well run, dice! There's half a dozen sweets. Seventh sweet, adieu ! Since you can cog, I'll play no more with you. Biron. One word in secret.



Biron. Thou griev'st my gall. Prin.


Dum. Will you Mar. Name it. Dum.


Let it not be sweet. Gall? bitter. Therefore meet. [They converse apart. vouchsafe with me to change a [word? Fair lady,Say you so? Fair lord,Take that for your fair lady. Please it you, Dum. As much in private, and I'll bid adieu. [They converse apart. Kath. What, was your visor made without a tongue? Long. I know the reason, lady, why you ask. Kath. O, for your reason! quickly, sir: I long. Long. You have a double tongue within your mask, And would afford my speechless visor half. [calf! Kath. Veal, quoth the Dutchman !-Is not veal a Long. A calf, fair lady? Kath. No, a fair lord calf.

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Long. Let's part the word. Kath. No, I'll not be your half: Take all, and wean it; it may prove an ox. Long. Look, how you butt yourself in these sharp Will you give horns, chaste lady? do not so. [mocks! Kath. Then die a calf, before your horns do grow. Long. One word in private with you, ere I die. Kath. Bleat softly then, the butcher hears you cry. [They converse apart. Boyet. The tongues of mocking wenches are as keen As is the razor's edge invisible, Cutting a smaller hair than may be seen; Above the sense of sense: so sensible Seemeth their conference; their conceits have wings, Fleeter than arrows, bullets, wind, thought, swifter things. [break off.

Ros. Not one word more, my maids; break off, Biron. By heaven, all dry-beaten with pure scoff! King. Farewell, mad wenches; you have simple wits. [Exeunt King, Lords, Moth, Music, and Attendants.

Prin. Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovites.Are these the breed of wits so wonder'd at? Boyet. Tapers they are, with your sweet breaths puff'd out. [fat.

Ros. Well-liking wits they have; gross, gross; fat, Prin. O poverty in wit, kingly-poor flout! Will they not, think you, hang themselves to-night? Or ever, but in visors, show their faces? This pert Biron was out of countenance quite.

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Kath. Yes, in good faith.

Qualm, perhaps.

Go, sickness as thou art!
Ros. Well,better wits have worn plain statute-caps.
But will you hear! the king is my love sworn.
Prin. And quick Biron hath plighted faith to me.
Kath. And Longaville was for my service born.
Mar. Dumain is mine, as sure as bark on tree.
Boyet. Madam, and pretty mistresses, give ear:
Immediately they will again be here

In their own shapes; for it can never be,
They will digest this harsh indignity.
Prin. Will they return?
They will, they will, God knows ;
And leap for joy, though they are lame with blows:
Therefore, change favours; and, when they repair,
Blow like sweet roses in the summer air.


Prin. How blow? how blow? speak to be underBoyet. Fair ladies, mask'd, are roses in their bud: Dismask'd, their damask sweet commixture shown, Are angels vailing clouds, or roses blown.

Prin. Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do, If they return in their own shapes to woo?

Kos. Good madam, if by me you'll be advis'd, Let's mock them still, as well known, as disgnis'd: Let us complain to them what fools were here, Disguis'd like Muscovites, in shapeless gear; And wonder what they were; and to what end Their shallow shows, and prologue vilely penn'd, And their rough carriage so ridiculous, Should be presented at our tent to us. Boyet. Ladies, withdraw; the gallants are at hand. Prin. Whip to our tents, as roes run over land. [Exeunt Princess, Ros. Kath, and Maria. Enter the King, Biron, Longaville, and Dumain, in their proper Habits.

King. Fair sir, God save you! Where is the princess? Boyet. Gone to her tent: Please it your majesty, Command me any service to her thither?

King. That she vouchsafe me audience for one word. Boyet. I will; and so will she, I know, my lord.

[Exit. Biron. This fellow pecks up wit, as pigeons peas; And utters it again when God doth please: He is wit's pedler; and retails his wares At wakes and wassels, meetings, markets, fairs; And we that sell by gross, the Lord doth know, Have not the grace to grace it with such show. This gallant pins the wenches on his sleeve; Had he been Adam, he had tempted Eve: He can carve too, and lisp: Why, this is he, That kiss'd away his hand in courtesy; This is the ape of form, monsieur the nice, That, when he plays at tables, chides the dice, In honourable terms; nay, he can sing A mean most meanly; and, in ushering, Mend him who can: the ladies call him, sweet: The stairs, as he treads on them, kiss his feet: This is the flower that smiles on every one, To show his teeth as white as whale's bone: And consciences, that will not die in debt, Pay him the due of honey-tongued Boyet. King. A blister on his sweet tongue, with my heart, That put Armado's page out of his part! Enter the Princess, ushered by Boyet; Rosaline, Maria, Katharine, and Attendants. Biron. See where it comes !-Behaviour, what wert thon, Till this man show'd thee? and what art thou now? King. All hail, sweet madam, and fair time of day! Prin. Fair, in all hail, is foul, as I conceive. King. Construe my speeches better, if you may. Prin. Then wish me better, I will give you leave. King. We came to visit you; and purpose now To lead you to our court: vouchsafe it then. Prin. This field shall hold me; and so hold your Nor God, nor I, delight in perjur❜d men. [vow: King. Rebuke me not for that which you provoke; The virtue of your eye must break my oath. Prin. You nick-name virtue: vice you should

have spoke;

For virtue's office never breaks men's troth.

Now, by my maiden honour, yet as pure
As the unsullied lily, I protest,
A world of torments though I should endure,

I would not yield to be your house's guest;
So much I hate a breaking cause to be
Of heavenly oaths, vow'd with integrity.
King. O, you have liv'd in desolation here,
Unseen, unvisited, much to our shame.
Prin. Not so, my lord; it is not so, I swear;
We have had pastimes here, and pleasant game;
A mess of Russians left us but of late.
King. How, madam? Russians?
Ay, in truth, my lord;
Trim gallants, fall of courtship, and of state.
Ros. Madam, speak true:-It is not so, my lord;
My lady, (to the manner of the days,)
In courtesy, gives undeserving praise.
We four, indeed, confronted here with four
In Russian habit: here they stay'd an hour,
And talk'd apace; and in that hour, my lord,
They did not bless us with one happy word.
I dare not call them fools; but this I think,
When they are thirsty, fools would fain have drink.
Biron. This jest is dry to me-Fair, gentle sweet,
Your wit makes wise things foolish; when we greet,
With eyes best seeing heaven's fiery eye,
By light we lose light: Your capacity
Is of that nature, that to your huge store
Wise things seem foolish, and rich things but poor.

King. I was, fair madam.
When you then were here,
What did you whisper in your lady's ear? [her.
King. That more than all the world I did respect
Prin. When she shall challenge this, you will re-
King. Upon mine honour, no.
[ject her.
Peace, peace, forbear;
Your oath once broke you force not to forswear.
King. Despise me, when I break this oath of mine.
Prin. I will; and therefore keep it :-Rosaline,
What did the Russian whisper in your ear?

Ros. Madam, he swore, that he did hold me dear
As precious eyesight; and did value me
Above this world adding thereto, moreover,
That he would wed me, or else die my lover.
Prin. God give thee joy of him! the noble lord
Most honourably doth uphold his word.

King. What mean you, madam? by my life, my
I never swore this lady such an oath.
Ros. By heaven, you did; and to confirm it plain,
You gave me this: but take it, sir, again.

King. My faith, and this, the princess I did give;
I knew her by this jewel on her sleeve.

Prin. Pardon me, sir, this jewel did she wear;
And lord Biron, I thank him, is my dear:
What; will you have me, or your pearl again?
Biron. Neither of either; I remit both twain.
I see the trick on't;-Here was a consent,
(Knowing aforehand of our merriment,)

Ros. This proves you wise and rich; for in my eye,-To dash it like a Christmas comedy:
Biron. I am a fool, and full of poverty.

Ros. But that you take what doth to you belong,
It were a fault to snatch words from my tongue.
Biron. O, I am yours, and all that I possess.
Ros. All the fool mine!
I cannot give you less.
Ros. Which of the visors was it, that you wore?
Biron. Where when? what visor? why demand

you this?

Some carry-tale, some please-man, some slight zany,
Some mumble-news, some trencher-knight, some


That smiles his cheek in years; and knows the trick To make my lady laugh, when she's dispos'd,Told our intents before: which once disclos'd, The ladies did change favours; and then we, Following the signs, woo'd but the sign of she. Now, to our perjury to add more terror, Ros. There, then, that visor; that superfluous case, We are again forsworn; in will, and error. That hid the worse, and show'd the better face. Much upon this it is :--And might not you, [To Boyet. King. We are descried: they'll mock us now down-Forestal our sport, to make us thus untrue? Dum. Let us confess, and turn it to a jest. [right. Do not you know my lady's foot by the squire, Prin. Amaz'd, my lord? Why looks your highness And laugh upon the apple of her eye! sad? [you pale ? And stand between her back, sir, and the fire, Ros. Help, hold his brows! he'll swoon! Why look Holding a trencher, jesting merrily? Sea-sick, I think, coming from Muscovy. [jury. You put our page out: Go, you are allow'd ; Biron. Thus pour the stars down plagues for per- Die when you will, a smock shall be your shrowd. Can any face of brass hold longer out?You leer upon me, do you? there's an eye, Here stand I, lady; dart thy skill at me; Wounds like a leaden sword. Boyet. Full merrily Hath this brave manage, this career, been run. Biron. Lo, he is tilting straight! Peace! I have

Bruise me with scorn, confound me with a flout;
Thrust thy sharp wit quite through my ignorance;
Cut me to pieces with thy keen conceit;
And I will wish thee never more to dance,
Nor never more in Russian habit wait.

O never will I trust to speeches penn'd,

Nor to the motion of a school-boy's tongue;

Nor never come in visor to my friend;

Nor woo in rhyme, like a blind harper's song:

Taffata phrases, silken terms precise,

Three-pil'd hyperboles, spruce affectation, Figures pedantical; these summer-flies

Have blown me full of maggot ostentation: I do forswear them and I here protest,


By this white glove, (how white the hand, God
Henceforth my wooing mind shall be express'd
In russet yeas, and honest kersey noes:
And, to begin, wench,-So God help me, la !-
My love to thee is sound, sans crack or flaw.
Ros. Sans, Sans, I pray you.


Yet I have a trick
Of the old rage :-bear with me, I am sick;
I'll leave it by degrees. Soft, let us see;-
Write, Lord have mercy on us, on those three;
They are infected, in their hearts it lies,
They have the plague, and caught it of your eyes:
These lords are visited; you are not free,
For the Lord's tokens on you do I see.
Prin. No, they are free, that gave these tokens to
Biron. Our states are forfeit, seek not to undo us.
Ros. It is not so; For how can this be true,
That you stand forfeit, being those that sue?


Biron. Peace; for I will not have to do with you.
Ros. Nor shall not, if I do as I intend.
Biron. Speak for yourselves, my wit is at an end.
King, Teach us, sweet madam, for our rude trans-
Some fair excuse.
The fairest is confession.


Were you not here, but even now, disguis'd?
King. Madam, I was.

And were you well advis'd?


Enter Costard.

Welcome, pure wit! thou partest a fair fray.
Cost. O Lord, sir, they would know,

Whether the three worthies shall come in, or no.
Biron. What, are there but three?

No, sir; but it is vara fine,

For every one pursents three.

And three times thrice is nine.
Cost. Not so, sir; under correction, sir; I hope,
it is not so:
[know what we know:
You cannot beg us, sir, I can assure you, sir: we
I hope, sir, three times thrice, sir,-
Is not nine.
Cost. Under correction, sir, we know whereuntil it
doth amount.

Biron. By Jove, I always took three threes for nine. Cost. O Lord, sir, it were pity you should get your living by reckoning, sir.

Biron. How much is it?

Cost. O Lord, sir, the parties themselves, the actors, sir, will show whereuntil it doth amount: for my own part, I am, as they say, but to parfect one man, -e'en one poor man; Pompion the great, sir. Biron. Art thou one of the worthies?

Cost. It pleased them, to think me worthy of Pompion the great for mine own part, I know not the degree of the worthy; but I am to stand for him. Biron. Go, bid them prepare.

Cost. We will turn it finely off, sir; we will take [Exit.

some care.

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Where zeal strives to content, and the contents
Die in the zeal of them which it presents,
Their form confounded makes most form in mirth;
When great things labouring perish in their birth.
Biron. A right description of our sport, my lord.
Enter Armado.

Arm. Anointed, I implore so much expense of thy royal sweet breath, as will utter a brace of words. [Armado converses with the King, and delivers him a Paper. Prin. Doth this man serve God? Biron. Why ask you?

Prin. He speaks not like a man of God's making. Arm. That's all one, my fair, sweet, honey monarch; for, I protest, the school-master is exceeding fantastical; too, too vain too, too vain: But we will put it, as they say, to fortuna della guerra. I wish you the peace of mind, most royal couplement! [Exit.

King. Here is like to be a good presence of worthies: He presents Hector of Troy; the swain, Pompey the great; the parish curate, Alexander; Armado's page, Hercules; the pedant, Judas Machabæus. And if these four worthies in their first show thrive, These four will change babits, and present the other Biron. There is five in the first show. [five. King. You are deceiv'd, 'tis not so. Biron. The pedant, the braggart, the hedge-priest,

the fool, and the boy :

Abate a throw at novum; and the whole world again, Cannot prick out five such, take each one in his vein, King. The ship is under sail, and here she comes


[Seats brought for the King, Princess, &c. Pageant of the Nine Worthies. Enter Costard armed, for Pompey.

Cost. I Pompey am,


You lie, you are not he.

Cost. I Pompey am,
With libbard's head on knee.
Biron. Well said, old mocker; I must needs be
friends with thee.

Cost. I Pompey am, Pompey surnam'd the big,-
Dum. The great.

Cost. It is great, sir;-Pompey surnam'd'the great; That oft in field, with large and shield, did make my foe to sweat :

[chance; And, travelling along this coast, I here am come by And lay my arms before the legs of this sweet lass of France.

If your ladyship would say, Thanks, Pompey, I had Prin. Great thanks, great Pompey. [done.

Cost. 'Tis not so much worth; but, I hope, I was perfect I made a little fault in, great.

Biron. My hat to a halfpenny, Pompey proves the best worthy.

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Biron. Well follow'd: Judas was hang'd on an
Hol. I will not be put out of countenance.
Biron. Because thou hast no face.
Hol. What is this?

Boyet. A cittern head.

Dum. The head of a bodkin.

Biron. A death's face in a ring.

Long. The face of an old Roman coin, scarce seen.
Boyet. The pummel of Cæsar's faulchion.
Dum. The carv'd-bone face on a flask.
Biron. St. George's half-cheek in a brooch.
Dum. Ay, and in a brooch of lead.

And now, forward; for we have put thee in counte
Biron. Ay, and worn in the cap of a tooth-drawer;
Hol. You have put me out of countenance. [nance.
Biron. False; we have given thee faces.
Hol. But you have out-fac'd them all.
Biron. An thou wert a lion, we would do so.
And so adieu, sweet Jade! nay, why dost thou stay?
Boyet. Therefore, as he is, an ass, let him go.
Dum. For the latter end of his name. [as, away.
Biron. For the ass to the Jude; give it him.-Jud-
Hol. This is not generous, not gentle, not humble.
Boyet. A light for monsieur Judas: it grows dark,
he may stumble.
Prin. Alas, poor Machabæus, how hath he been

Enter Armado armed, for Hector. Biron. Hide thy head, Achilles: here comes Hector in arms.

Dum. Though my mocks come home by me, I will now be merry.

King. Hector was but a Trojan in respect of this.
Boyet. But is this Hector?

Dum. I think, Hector was not so clean-timber'd.
Long. His leg is too big for Hector.
Dum. More calf, certain.

Boyet, No, he is best indued in the small.
Biron. This cannot be Hector,

Dum. He's a god or a painter; for he makes faces. Arm. The armipotent Mars, of lances the alGave Hector a gift.

Dum. A gilt nutmeg.

Biron. A lemon.

Long. Stuck with cloves.

Dum. No, cloven.

Arm. Peace.


The armipotent Mars, of lances the almighty, Gave Hector a gift, the heir of Ilion;

Enter Nathaniel armed, for Alexander. Nath. When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's commander: [ing might: By east, west, north, and south, I spread my conquerMy 'scutcheon plain declares, that I am Alisander. Boyet. Your nose says, no, you are not; for it stands too right. [smelling knight. Biron. Your nose smells, no, in this, most tender- A Prin. The conqueror is dismay'd: Proceed, good Alexander. [commander: I Nath. When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's Boyet. Most true, 'tis right; you were so, Alisander. Biron. Pompey the great,Cost.

Your servant, and Costard.

man so breath'd, that certain he would fight, yea From morn till night, out of his pavilion. am that flower,



That mint.

That columbine. Arm. Sweet lord Longaville, rein thy tongue. Long. I must rather give it the rein; for it runs

Biron. Take away the conqueror, take away Ali-against Hector.


Cost. O, sir, [To Nath.] you have overthrown Alisander the conqueror! You will be scraped out of the painted cloth for this: your lion, that holds his poll-ax sitting on a close-stool, will be given to Ajax; he will be the ninth worthy. A conqueror, and afeard to speak! run away for shame, Alisander. [Nath. retires.] There, an't shall please you; a foolish mild man; an honest man, look you, and soon dash'd! He is a marvellous good neighbour, insooth; and a very good bowler: but, for Alisander, alas, you see, how 'tis; a little o'erparted:-But there are worthies a coming will speak their mind in some other sort. Prin. Stand aside, good Pompey.

Enter Holofernes armed, for Judas, and Moth
armed, for Hercules.

Hol. Great Hercules is presented by this imp, Whose club kill'd Cerberus, that three-headed And, when he was a babe, a child, a shrimp, [canus; Thus did he strangle serpents in his manus

Dum. Ay, and Hector's a greyhound.

Arm. The sweet war-man is dead and rotten; sweet chucks, beat not the bones of the buried: when he breath'd, he was a man-But I will forward with my device: Sweet royalty, [To the Princess.] bestow on me the sense of hearing. [Biron whispers Costard. Prin. Speak, brave Hector, we are much delighted. Arm. I do adore thy sweet grace's slipper. Boyet. Loves her by the foot. Dum. He may not by the yard.

Arm. This Hector far surmounted Hannibal,Cost. The party is gone, fellow Hector, she is gone; she is two months on her way.

Arm. What meanest thou?

Cost. Faith, unless you play the honest Trojan, the poor wench is cast away: she's quick; the child brags in her belly already; 'tis yours.

Arm. Dost thou infamonise me among potentates !

thou shalt die.

Cost. Then shall Hector be whipp'd, for Jaquenetta

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