Instructor of Physics.-" And what sir, are the limits to the syphon?" Junior confused." Well sir, it wont work if the longer arm is shorter than the other."-Yale Courant. A Vassar student was heard from lately through a letter to a lady friend. Among others she related of the wonderful advancement made in the Calisthenic art: "There's Joe she can turn a handspring without wrinkling her dress; Ida out loosening her stays; Kate can hang off by her feet; I put a beautiful head on Mary port' progess." "—Targum. can skin the cat' withthe horizontal bar Tuesday. We re "Pocahontas and Captain Smith. Jamestown, A. D., 1607. Johannes Smithus, walking up a streetus, met two ingentes Ingins et parvulus Ingin. Ingins non capti sunt ab Johanne, sed Johannes captus est ab ingentibus Inginibus. Parvulus Ingin run off hollerin, et terrificatus est most to death. Big Ingin removit Johannem ad tentum, ad campum, ad marshy placem, papoosem, pipe or peacem, bogibus, squawque. Quum Johannes examinatus est ab Inginibus, they condemnati sunt him to be cracked on capitem ab clubbibus. Et a big Ingin was going to strikaturus esse Smithum with a clubbe, quum Pocahontas come trembling down et hollerin, 'Don't ye duit, don't ye duit!' Sic Johannes non perit sed grew fat on corn bread et hominy." It is needless to add that that Freshman did not pass in Latin.--Ex. One of the city clergymen attended clinics one day, and thereupon wrote an article for the Detroit 7 ribune, showing the people how his modesty was shocked at the exposure of the patient's body. When we know that the operation was such that an amputation of the leg might have been a neccessary expedient, we laugh at the preacher's prudery, and can only compare it to the modesty of the Lake Survey boy who would not disrobe himself before extinguishing the light for fear that there might be a female musquito in his tent. 66 A foreigner, who hails from a milder clime, says that our lake breezes are superbe," but he didn't bargain to prostrate himself on the campus, and hang on to a root with his teeth until his boots were flapped off by the wind.-Cornell Review. Brisko was conversing with a young lady from Vassar the other eve. She remarked that she was found of Greek, and added that Homer was her favorite author. When Brisko asked her what work of his she especially admired, she replied: "I have not yet read his Eneid, but his Idiocy is perfectly sublime !"--Williams Review. Prof. in Zoology.--What is the name of the largest species of whale? Student.--The Shark. An Oxford undergraduate, in the Scripture examination, was called upon to mention "the two instances recorded in Scripture of the lower animals speaking." He thought for a moment and replied, "Balaam's ass." "That is one, sir; what is the other? Undergradnate paused in earnest thought. At last a gleam of recollection lit up his face as he replied--"The whale!" The whale said unto Jonah-"almost thou persuadest me to be a Christian.” A young gentleman, a telegraph operator in one of the offices, the other day, after repeated calls for a young lady operator in another office, at last got a response, then he telegraphed back to her: "I have been trying to get you for the last half hour!" In a moment the following spicy reply came tripping back to him over the wires from the telegraphic maiden: "That's nothing. There is a young man here been trying to do the same thing for the last two years, and he hasn't got me yet," One of our professors lately, in explaining to a class of young ladies the theory according to which the body is entirely renewed every seven years said: "Thus, Miss B., in seven years you will in reality be no longer Miss B." "I sincerely hope I shan't," demurely responded the girl, casting down her eyes.-Acta Columbiana. A gentleman who rather suspected some one was peeping through the keyhole of his office door, investigated with a syringe full of pepper-sauce, and went home to find his wife had been cutting wood and a chip had hit her in the eye.-Ex. (Successor to DATESMAN & ANGLE,) Cash Merchant Cailoring and Clothing Emporium, No. 237 NORTHAMPTON STREET, EASTON, PENN'A, Between Second and Third Streets, Every variety of D. M. ANGLE. Has constantly on hand the largest assortment of PIECE GOODS in Easton. The most fastidious can be suited. All work guaranteed to please the wearer. GENTS' FURNISHING GOODS. WM. DATESMAN, Cutter. J. A. WEAVER'S sept-11t. PHARMACY, PORTER'S BLOCK, SOUTH THIRD STREET, Pure Drugs and Medicines, FINE CHEMICALS, Toilet Articles, Perfumery, Soap, Brushes, &c., &c. Especial attention given to compounding Physicians' Prescrip tions. I was Naked, and ye Clothed me not,. Dutch Stories and Legends in Irving's Works.... By Paul Ward,. .224 .229 A Chapter on Eloquence,. Juliet and Ophelia, Cuba Pour Los Cubanos,. Inter-Collegiate Literary Association, Editorial Notes,... Lafayette and Easton,... Lafayette Personals,.. Miscellaneous,. |