pleasure, inform me now whither chance has con"ducted me."

"Thou art now," replied the fmiling power, "in the presence of JUSTICE, and of TRUTH, whom "the father of gods and men has fent down to regif

ter the demands and pretenfions of mankind, that "the world may at last be reduced to order, and that "none may complain hereafter of being doomed to "tafks for which they are unqualified, of poffeffing "faculties for which they cannot find employment, "or virtues that languifh unobferved for want of op"portunities to exert them, of being encumbered "with fuperfluities which they would willingly re

fign, or of wafting away in defires which ought "to be fatisfied. JUSTICE is now to examine every "man's wishes, and TRUTH is to record them; let "us approach, and obferve the progrefs of this great "tranfaction."

She then moved forward, and TRUTH, who knew her among the most faithful of her followers, beckoned her to advance, till we were placed near the feat of JUSTICE. The first who required the affiftance of the office, came forward with a flow pace, and tumour of dignity, and shaking a weighty purse in his hand, demanded to be registered by TRUTH, as the MECENAS of the prefent age, the chief encourager of literary merit, to whom men of learning and wit might apply in any exigence or distress with certainty of fuccour. JUSTICE very mildly enquired, whether he had calculated the expence of fuch a declaration? whether he had been informed what number of petitioners would fwarm about him? whether he could distinguish idleness and negligence from calamity,

often

oftentation from knowledge, or vivacity from wit? To these questions he feemed not well provided with a reply, but repeated his defire to be recorded as a patron. JUSTICE then offered to register his propofal on thefe conditions, that he should never fuffer himfelf to be flattered; that he should never delay an audience when he had nothing to do; and that he should never encourage followers without intending to reward them. Thefe terms were too hard to be accepted; for what, faid he, is the end of patronage, but the pleasure of reading dedications, holding multitudes in suspense, and enjoying their hopes, their fears, and their anxiety, flattering them to affiduity, and, at last, difmiffing them for impatience? JUSTICE heard his confeffion, and ordered his name to be posted upon the gate among cheats, and robbers, and publick nuifances, which all were by that notice warned to avoid.

Another required to be made known as the difcoverer of a new art of education, by which languages and sciences might be taught to all capacities, and all inclinations, without fear of punifhment, pain of confinement, lofs of any part of the gay mien of igno rance, or any obftruction of the neceffary progress in drefs, dancing, or cards.

JUSTICE and TRUTH did not trouble this great adept with many enquiries; but finding his addrefs awkward, and his fpeech barbarous, ordered him to be registered as a tail fellow who wanted employment, and might ferve in any poft where the knowledge of reading and writing was not required.

A man of a very great and philofophick afpect, required notice to be given of his intention to fet out,

a certain

a certain day, on a fubmarine voyage, and of his willingness to take in paffengers for no more than double the price at which they might fail above water. His defire was granted, and he retired to a convenient stand, in expectation of filling his ship, and growing rich in a fhort time by the fecrecy, fafety, and expedition of the paffage.

Another defired to advertise the curious, that he had, for the advancement of true knowledge, contrived an optical inftrument, by which those who laid out their industry on memorials of the changes of the wind, might obferve the direction of the weathercocks on the hitherfide of the lunar world.

Another wifhed to be known as the author of an invention, by which cities or kingdoms might be made warm in winter by a fingle fire, a kettle, and pipe. Another had a vehicle by which a man might bid defiance to floods, and continue floating in an inundation, without any inconvenience, till the water fhould fubfide. JUSTICE confidered these projects as of no importance but to their authors, and therefore scarcely condefcended to examine them; but TRUTH refused to admit them into the register.

But JUSTICE

Twenty different pretenders came in one hour to give notice of an univerfal medicine, by which all diseases might be cured or prevented, and life protracted beyond the age of NESTOR. informed them, that one univerfal medicine was fufficient, and she would delay the notification till she faw who could longest preserve his own life.

A thousand other claims and offers were exhibited and examined, I remarked, among this mighty multitude, that, of intellectual advantages, many

had great exuberance, and few confessed any want; of every art there were a hundred profeffors for a fingle pupil; but of other attainments, fuch as riches, honours, and preferments, I found none that had too much, but thousands and ten thousands that thought themselves intitled to a larger dividend.

It often happened, that old mifers, and women, married at the clofe of life, advertised their want of children; nor was it uncommon for those who had a numerous offspring, to give notice of a fon or daughter to be spared; but though appearances promifed well on both fides, the bargain feldom fucceeded; for they foon loft their inclination to adopted children, and proclaimed their intentions to promote some scheme of publick charity: a thousand propofals were immediately made, among which they hefitated till death precluded the decifion.

As I ftood looking on this fcene of confufion, TRUTH Condefcended to ask me, what was my businefs at her office? I was ftruck with the unexpected queftion, and awaked by my efforts to answer it.

NUMB. 106. SATURDAY, March 23, 1751.

Opinionum commenta delet dies, naturæ judicia confirmat. Cic.

Time obliterates the fictions of opinion, and confirms the decifions of nature.

T is neceffary to the fuccefs of flattery, that it be accommodated to particular circumstances or characters, and enter the heart on that fide where the paffions ftand ready to receive it. A lady feldom liftens with attention to any praise but that of her beauty; a merchant always expects to hear of his influence at the bank, his importance on the exchange, the height of his credit, and the extent of his traffick and the author will scarcely be pleased without lamentations of the neglect of learning, the confpiracies against genius, and the flow progress of merit, or some praises of the magnanimity of those who encounter poverty and contempt in the cause of knowledge, and truft for the reward of their labours to the judgment and gratitude of pofterity.

An affurance of unfading laurels, and immortal reputation, is the fettled reciprocation of civility between amicable writers. To raise monuments more durable than brafs, and more confpicuous than pyramids, has been long the common boast of literature; but among the innumerable architects that erect columns to themselves, far the greater part, either for want of durable materials, or of art to difpofe them, fee their edifices perifh as they are towering to completion,

and