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SCENE I.-An Apartment in FREEMAN'S
House.

Enter FREEMAN and LovEL.

Free. A country boy! ha, ha, ha!-How long has this scheme been in your head?

an honest fellow; and I will swear for my blacks. -If there is a rogue among my folks, it is that surly dog Tom.

Free. You are mistaken in every one. Philip is an hypocritical rascal; Tom has a good deal of surly honesty about him; and for your blacks, they are as bad as your whites.

Lov. Pr'ythee, Freeman, how came you to be so well acquainted with my people? None of the wenches are handsome enough to move the affections of a middle-aged gentleman as you are set-ha, ha. ha!

Lov. Some time.I am now convinced, of what you have often been hinting to me, that I am confoundedly cheated by my servants. Free. Oh, are you satisfied at last, Mr. Lovely I always told you, that there is not a worse of servants in the parish of St. James's, than in your kitchen.

Lor. Tis with some difficulty I believe it now, Mr. Freeman; though, I must own, my expences often make me stare.- -Philip, I am sure, is

Free. You are a young man, Mr. Lovel, and take a pride in a number of idle unnecessary servants, who are the plague and reproach of this kingdom.

Lov. Charles, you are an old-fashioned fellow,

Servants a plague and reproach! ha, ha, ha! I-Odd and honest! Well-and now, what are would have forty more, if my house would hold the steps you intend to take. them. Why, man, in Jamaica, before I was ten years old, I had a hundred blacks kissing my feet every day.

Free. You gentry of the Western Isles are high-mettled ones, and love pomp and parade. I have seen it delight your soul, when the people in the street have stared at your equipage; especially if they whispered loud enough to be heard, That is Squire Lovel, the great West Indian—ha, ha, ba!

Lov. I should be very sorry if we were as splenetic as you northern islanders, who are devoured with melancholy and fog-ha, ha, ha! No, sir, we are children of the sun, and are born to diffuse the bounteous favour which our noble parent is pleased to bestow upon us.

Free. I wish you had more of your noble parent's regularity, and less of his fire. As it is, you consume so fast, that not one in twenty of you live to be fifty years old.

Lov. But in that fifty we live two hundred, my dear; mark that—But to business-I am resolved upon my frolic-I will know whether my servants are rogues or not. If they are, I bastinado the rascals; if not, I think I ought to pay for my impertinance.- -Pray tell me, is not your Robert acquainted with my people? Perhaps he may give a little light into the thing.

[Returns the letter. Lov. I shall immediately apply to my friend the manager for a disguise.-Under the form of a gawky country boy, I will be an eye-witness of my servants' behaviour.-You must assist me, Mr. Freeman.

Free. As how, Mr. Lovel?

Lov. My plan is this-I gave it out that I was going to my borough in Devonshire; and yesterday set out with my servant in great form, and lay at Basingstoke.-

Free. Well?

Lov. I ordered the fellow to make the best of his way down into the country, and told him that I would follow him; instead of that, I turned back, and am just come to town: Ecce signum! [Points to his boots.

Free. It is now one o'clock. Lov. This very afternoon I shall pay my people a visit.

Free. How will you get in?

Lov. When I am properly habited, you shall get me introduced to Philip, as one of your tenant's sons, who wants to be made a good ser vant of.

Free. They will certainly discover you.

Lov. Never fear; I'll be so countrified, that you shall not know me.— -As they are thoroughly persuaded I am many miles off, they'll be more easily imposed on. Ten to one, but they begin to celebrate my departure with a drinking bout, if they are what you describe

Free. To tell you the truth, Mr. Lovel, your servants are so abandoned, that I have forbid him your house. However, if you have a mind to ask hin any question, he shall be forth-themcoming.

Lov. Let us have him.

Free. You shall: but it is an hundred to one if you get any thing out of him; for though he is a very honest fellow, yet he is so much of a servant, that he'll never tell any thing to the disadvantage of another.Who waits?

Enter Servant.

Send Robert to me. [Exit Servant.]—And what was it determined you upon this project at last?

Free. Shall you be able to play your part? Lov. I am surprized, Mr. Freeman, that you, who have known me from my infancy, should not remember my abilities in that way.-But you old fellows have short memories.

Free. What should I remember?

Lov. How I played Daniel in the Conscious Lovers at school, and afterwards arrived at the distinguished character of the mighty Mr. Scrub[Mimicking.

Free. Ha, ha, ha! that is very well-Enough
-Here is Robert.

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Rob. I hope your honours will not insist on my saying any thing in an affair of this kind? Lor. Oh, but we do insist, if you know any thing

Rob. Sir, I am but a servant myself: and it would not become me to speak ill of a brother

servant.

Free. Psha! this is false honesty!—speak

out.

Rob. Don't oblige me, good sir. Consider, sir, a servant's bread depends upon his carackter.

Lor. But if a servant uses me ill

Rob. Alas, sir! what is one man's poison, is another man's meat.

Free. You see how they trim for one another!

Rob. Service, sir, is no inheritance. A servant that is not approved in one place, may give satisfaction in another. Every body must live, your honour.

Lov. I like your heartiness as well as your caution; but, in my case, it is necessary that I should know the truth.

Rob. The truth, sir, is not to be spoken at all times; it may bring one into trouble; whereof if

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Free. Ha, ha, ha! you'll make a fine figure.

Lov. They shall make a fine figure. It must be done this afternoon: walk with me across the Park, and I'll tell you the whole. My name shall be Jemmy; and I am come to be a gentleman's servant-and will do my best, and hope to get a good carackter. [Mimicking.

Free. But what will you do if you find them rascals?

Lov. Discover myself, and blow them all to the devil! Come along.

Free. Ha, ha, ha! Bravo! Jemmy! Bravo! [Exeunt.

ha, ha!

SCENE II.-The Park.

Enter Duke's Servant

What wretches are ordinary servants, that go on in the same vulgar track every day! eating, working, and sleeping!—But we, who have the

Free. [Musing.] Whereof if-Pray, Mr. Lovel, let me see that letter again. [LOVEL gives the letter.]Aye-it must be so; Ro-honour to serve the nobility, are of another spe

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Rob. I am sorry to say it to your honour, but your honour is not only imposed on, but laughed at by all your servants, especially by Philip, who is a very bad man.

Lov. Philip! an ungrateful dog! Well? Rob. I could not presume to speak to your honour; and therefore I resolved, though but a poor scribe, to write your honour a letter. Loc. Robert, I am greatly indebted to you. Here[Offers money. Rob. On any other account than this, I should be proud to receive your honour's bounty; but now I beg to be excused.

Lov Thou hast a noble heart, Robert, and I'll not forget you! Freeman, he must be in the secret. Wait your master's orders,

cies. We are above the common forms, have servants to wait upon us, and are as lazy and luxurious as our masters-Ha! my dear Sir Harry!

Enter SIR HARRY'S Servant.

How have done these thousand years?

you

Sir Har. My lord Duke!-your grace's most obedient servant.

Duke. Well, baronet, and where have you been?

Sir Har. At Newmarket, my lord. We have had devilish fine sport!

Duke. And a good appearance, I hear-Pox take it, I should have been there; but our old duchess died, and we were obliged to keep house for the decency of the thing.

Sir Har. I picked up fifteen pieces.
Duke. P'sha! a trifle!

Sir Har. The viscount's people have been bloodily taken in this meeting.

Duke. Credit me, baronet, they know nothing of the turf.

Sir Har. I assure you, my lord, they lost every match; for Crab was beat hollow, Careless threw his rider, and Miss Slammerkin had the distemper.

Duke. Ha, ha, ha! I'm glad on't-Taste this snuff, Sir Harry. [Offers his box.

Sir Har. 'Tis good rapee. Duke. Right Strasburg, I assure you; and of my own importing.

Sir Har. Aye!

Duke. The city people adulterate it so confoundedly, that I always import my own snuff.

I wish my lord would do the same; but he is so indolent-When did you see the girls? I saw Lady Bab this morning; but, 'fore Gad, whether it be love or reading, she looked as pale as a penitent.

Sir Har. I have just had this card from Lovel's people. [Reads.

Philip and Mrs. Kitty present their com pliments to Sir Harry, and desire the honour of his company this evening, to be of a smart party, and eat a bit of supper.'

Duke. I have the same invitation. Their master, it seems, is gone to his borough.

Sir Har. You'll be with us, my lord?-Philip's a blood.

Duke. A buck of the first head! I'll tell you a secret; he's going to be married. Sir Har. To whom?

Duke. To Kitty.

Sir Har. No!

Duke. Yes, he is; and I intend to cuckold him.

Sir Har. Then we may depend upon your grace for certain. Ha, ha, ha!

Duke. If our house breaks up in a tolerable time, I'll be with you-Have you any thing for us?

Sir Har. Yes, a little bit of poetry. I must be at the Cocoa-tree myself till eight.

Duke. Heigh, ho! I am quite out of spiritsI had a damned debauch last night, baronetLord Francis, Bob the bishop, and I, tipt off four bottles of Burgundy a-piece-Ha! there are two fine girls coming! Faith, Lady Bab! aye, and Lady Charlotte! [Takes out his glass.

Sir Har. We'll not join them. Duke. O yes; Bab is a fine wench, notwithstanding her complexion: though I should be glad she would keep her teeth cleaner-Your English women are damned negligent about their teeth- -How is your Charlotte in that particular?

Sir Har. My Charlotte! Duke. Ay, the world says you are to have ber.

Sir Har. I own I did keep her company; but we are off, my lord.

Duke. How so?

Sir Har. Between you and me, she has a plaguy thick pair of legs!

Duke. Oh, damn it; that's insufferable! Sir Har. Besides, she's a fool, and missed her opportunity with the old countess.

Duke. I am afraid, baronet, you love money. Rot it, I never save a shilling! Indeed I am sure of a place in the excise- -Lady Charlotte is to be of the party to-night; how do you manage

that?

Sir Har. Why, we do meet at a third place; are very civil, and look queer, and laugh, and abuse one another, and all that.

Duke. A-la-mode, ha!-Here they are.

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hall.

Lady Bab. O my stars! Why, there is nobody there but filthy citizens.

Lady Char. We were in hopes the raising the price would have kept them out, ha, ha, ha! Lady Bab. Ha, ha, ha!Runelow for my money.

Lady Char. Now you talk of Runelow, when did you see the Colonel, Lady Bab?

Lady Bab. The Colonel! I hate the fellowHe had the assurance to talk of a creature in Gloucestershire, before my tace.

Lady Char. He is a pretty man for all thatSoldiers, you know, have their mistresses every where.

Lady Bub. I despise him! How goes on your affair with the baronet?

Lady Char. The baronet is a stupid wretch, and I shall have nothing to say to him. You are to be at Lovel's to-night, Lady Bab?

Lady Bab. Unless I alter my mind-I don't admire visiting these commoners, Lady Charlotte.

Lady Char. Oh, but Mrs. Kitty has taste.
Lady Bab. She affects it.

Lady Char. The duke is fond of her, and he has judgment.

Lady Bab. The duke might shew his judgment much better.

[Holding up her head. Lady Char. There he is, and the baronet, too. Take no notice of them.

and by.

Lady Bub. Dall souls! laugh, and leave them.

We'll rally them by

Let us set up a loud

Lady Cha. Ay, let us begone; for the common people do so stare at us--we shall certainly be mobbed.

Both. Ha, ha, ha!-ha, ha, ha! [Exeunt.

Duke and SIR HARRY come forward. Duke. They certainly saw us, and are gone off laughing at us. I must follow.

Sir Har. No, no.

Duke. I must, I must have a party of raillery with them; a bon mot or so. Sir Harry, you'll excuse me. Adieu! I'll be with you in the evening, if possible: though, hark ye! there is a bill depending in our house, which the ministry make a point of our attending; and so, you know, mum! we must mind the stops of the great fiddle.-Adieu! [Exit Duke.

Sir Har. What a coxcomb this is! and the fellow can't read. It was but the other day that he was a cow-boy in the country; then was bound prentice to a periwig-maker, got into my lord duke's family, and now sets up for a fine gentleman: O tempora, O mores!

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