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don't recollect to have heard of the lady before.

Nov. She, my lord? Oh, she was a kind of what-d'ye-call-em--a sort of a queen, or wife, or something or other to somebody that lived a damned while ago -Mummy told me the whole story; but, before gad, I've forgot it. But come,

the busts.

Car. Bring forward the head from Herculaneam. Now, gentlemen, here is a jewel. All. Av, av, let's see.

Car. 'Tis not entire, though.
Nov. So much the better.

Car. Right, sir-the very mutilations of this piece are worth all the most perfect performances of modern artists.-Now, gentlemen, here's a touchstone for your taste!

All. Great! great indeed!

Nor. Great! amazing! divine! Oh, let me embrace the dear dismembered bust! A little farther off. I'm ravished! I'm transported! What an attitude! But then the locks! How I adore the simplicity of the ancients! How unlike the present, piggish, crop-eared puppets! How gracefully they fall all a-down the cheek! wo decent and so grave, and-Who the devil vio you think it is, Brush? Is it a man, or a woman?

C. The connoisseurs differ. Some will have it to be the Jupiter Tonans of Phidias, and others the Venus of Paphos from Praxiteles; but I don't think it fierce enough for the first, nor handsome enough for the last.

Nor. Yes, handsome enough.

All. Very handsome; handsome enough. Car. Not quite-therefore I am inclined to Join with Signor Julio de Pampedillo, who, in a treatise dedicated to the king of the two Sicilies, calls it the Serapis of the Egyptians; and supposes it to have been fabricated about eleven hundred and three years before the Mosaic acaccount of the creation.

Nov. Prodigious! and I dare swear true.
All. Oh! true, very true.

Puff. Upon my honour, 'tis a very fine bust; but where is de nose?

Nov. The nose; what care I for the nose? Where is de nose? Why, sir, if it had a nose, I would not give sixpence for it-How the devil should we distinguish the works of the ancients, if they were perfect?-The nose indeed! Why, I don't suppose now, but, barring the nose, Roubiliac could cut as good a head every whitBrush, who is this man with his nose? The fellow should know something of something too, for he speaks broken English."

Brush. It is Mynheer Groningen, a great connoisseur in painting.

Nov. That may be: But as to sculpture, I am his very humble servant. A man must know damned little of statuary, that dislikes a bust for int of a nose.

Car. Right, sir-The nose itself, without the ad, nay, in another's possession, would be an iste But here are behind, gentlemen and

ladies, an equestrian statue of Marcus Aurelius without the horse, and a complete statue of the emperor Trajan, with only the head and legs missing; both from Herculaneum-This way, gentlemen and ladies.

Enter LADY PENTWEAZEL, ALDERMAN, and CALEB.

Lady Pent. Now, Mr. Pentweazel, let us have none of your Blowbladder breeding. Remember you are at the court-end of the town. This is a quality-auction.

Ald. Where of course nothing is sold that is useful-I am tutored, sweet honey. Lady Pent. Caleb, keep behind, and don't be meddling. Sir[TO BRUSH.

Brush. Your pleasure, madam? Lady Pent. I should be glad you would inform me if there are any lots of very fine old china. I find the quality are grown infinitely fond of it; and I am willing to show the world that we in the city have taste.

Brush. Tis a laudable resolution, madam; and I dare say Mr. Canto can supply-Bless me! what's that?

[CALEB throws down a china-dish. Lady Pent, That boy, I suppose! Well, if the mischievous brat has not broke a-and look how he stands !-Sirrah, sirrah, did I not bid you not meddle-Leave sucking your thumbs. What, I suppose you learnt that trick of your friend the monkey in the waggon?

Caleb. Indeed I did not go to do it, mother. Ald. Pr'ythee, sweet honey, don't be so passionate. What's done can't be undone, The loss is not great; come, come.

Brush. Mr. Alderman is in the right. The affair is a trifle; but a twenty guinea job. Lady Pent. Twenty guineas! You should have twenty of my teeth as

-Your

Car. You mean if you had themladyship does not know the value of that piece of china. It is the right old japan of the pea-green kind. Lady Mandarin offered me, if I could match it, fourscore guineas for the pair. Lord Dupe. A fine piece, indeed! Puff. 'Tis ver fine!

Caleb. Indeed, father, I did not break it Twas cracked in the middle, and so fell a-two in my hand.

Lady Pent. What! was it cracked?
Caleb. Yes, indeed, mother.
Lady Pent. There, gentlemen!

Lord Dupe. Madam, I would willingly set you right in this affair: you don't seem acquanted with these kind of things; therefore, I have the honour to tell you, that the crack in the middle is a mark of its antiquity, and enhances its value; and these gentlemen are, I dare say, of the same opinion.

All. Oh, entirely.

Lady Pent. You are all of a gang, I think. A broken piece of china better than a whole one!

Lord Dupe. Madam, I never dispute with a lady; but this gentleman has taste; he is a foreigner, and so can't be thought prejudiced; refer it to him: the day grows late, and I want the auction to begin.

Ald. Sweet honey, leave it to the gentleman. Lady Pent. Well, sir.

glory in it. But what point will you virtuosi you connoisseurs, gain by the detection? Will not the publishing of our crimes trumpet forth your folly?

Lord Dupe. Matchless impudence!

Puff. My noble lord here, the dilletanti, the curieus, the precicus of this nation! what infiPuff. Madam, I love to serve de lady. Tis a nite glory will he acquire from this story, that the ver fine piece of china. I was see such another Leo, the Mæcenas, the Petronius, notwithstandpiece sell at Amsterdam for a hundred ducats-ing his exquisite taste, has been drawn in to pur'Tis ver well worth twenty guinea. chase, at an immense expence, a cart-load ofrubbish!

Lord Dupe. Gentlemen and ladies-I have the honour to take my leave.

Caleb. Mother!-father! never stir if that gentleman ben't the same that we see'd at the painting-man's, that was so civil to mother; only he has got a black wig on, and speaks outlandish. I'll be far enough if it en't a May-shall I send you your Corregio, your St. Anthony game!

Lady Pent. Hey! let me die, but the boy's in the right. My dear, as I'm alive, Mr. Puff, that we saw at the limners. I told you he was a more cleverer man than I ever saw. Caleb is right; some matter of merriment, I warrant. Puff. I wish it was. [Aside.] I no understand. Car. So, Mr. Puff, you are caught. [Aside. Lord Dupe. This is a most unfortunate old lady- -Madam, you are here under another mistake.__This is Mynheer Baron de

Lady Pent. Mynheer Figs-end. Can't I believe my own eyes? What! do you think beCause we live in the city we can't see?

Nov. Fire me, my lord, there may be more in this than we can guess. Its worth examining into. Come, sir, if you are Mynheer, who the devil knows you?

Puff. I was no Mr. Canto mightily.

Nov. Mr. Canto, do you know this baron? Car. I see the dog will be detected, and now is my time to be even with him for his rounds of beef and roasting pigs. [Aside.] I can't say I ever saw the gentleman before.

Nov. Oh, oh!

Lord Dupe. The fellow is an impostor; a palpable cheat. Sir, I think you came from the Rhine-pray, how should you like walking into the Thames?

Nov. Or what think you my lord? The rascal complained but now that the bust wanted a nose suppose we were to supply the deficiency with his?

Lord Dupe. But justice, Mr. Novice. Car. Great rascal, indeed, gentlemen!-if rogues of this stamp get once a footing in these assemblies, adieu to all moral honesty. I think an example should be made of himBut, were I to advise, he is a properer subject for the rabble to handle than the present company.

All. Away with him!

Puff. Your lordship's most obedient-When

of Padua, your Ram Cat, my good lord? Lord Dupe. Rascal! Erit LORD Dupe. Nov. This won't do, sir-Though my lord has not spirit enough, damu me if I quit you!

Puff. What, my sprightly 'squire! Pray favour me with a sight of your Oriuna-It has the relish; an indisputable antique: being a Bristol farthing, coined by a soap-boiler to pay his journeymen in the scarcity of cash, and purchased for two-pence of a travelling tinker by, sir, your humble servant, Timothy Puff. Ha, ha, ha!

Nov. My Oriuna a Bristol farthing!
Puff. Most assuredly.
Nov. I'll be revenged.

[Going.

Puff. Stay, stay, and take your bust, my sweet 'squire; your Serapis. Two heads, thay say, are better than one; lay them together. But the locks! how gracefully they fall all a-down; so decent, and so-ha, ha, ha!

Nov. Confound you!

Puff. Why, sir, if it had a nose, I would not give sixpence for it-Pray, how many years before the creation was it fabricated, 'squire?

Nov. I shall live to see you hanged, you dog!

[Exit.

Puff. Nay, but, 'squire; ha, ha, ha!-Now, madam, to your ladyship I come; to whose discernment, aided by the sagacity of your son Caleb, I own my discovery.

Ald. Look you, don't think to abuse my lady. I am one of the

Puff. Quorum-I know it, Mr. Alderman; but I mean to serve your worship, by humbling a little the vanity of your wife.

Lady Pent. Come along, chuck. I'll not stay to hear the rascality of the fellow.

Puff. Oh, my Lady Pentweazel, correct the severity of that frown, lest you should have more of the Medusa than the Medicis in your face.

Lady Pent. Saucy jackanapes!

Puff. What, then? I have quite lost my city acquaintance? why, I've promised all my friends tickets for my lord mayor's ball through your ladyship's interest.

Puff. Hands off--if I must suffer, it shall not be singly. Here is the obsequious Mr. Brush, and the very courtly Mr. Canto, shall be the partners of my distress. Know, then, we are all rogues, if the taking advantage of the Lady Pent. My interest, indeed, for such a→ absurdities and follies of mankind can be called Puff. If Blowbladder-street has any charms Toguery. I own I have been a cheat, and I-Sir-Madam-not a step-The finest gentle

man! ha, ha, ha!And what can you say for yourself, you cowardly ill-looking rascal? [To CARMINE,] Desert your friend at the first pinch-your ally-your partner!No apology, sir-I have done with you. From poverty and shame I took you, to that I restore you. Your crime be your punishment. [Turning to the audience.] Could I be as secure from the censure of this assembly, as I am safe from the

resentment of Dupe, Novice, Squander, from the alluring baits of my amorous city lady, and the dangerous combination of my false friend, I should be happy.

Tis from your sentence I expect my fate; Your voice alone my triumph can complete.

[Exeunt omnes.

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SCENE I-A Room in SUBTLE's house.

Enter MR. SUBTLE and CLASSIC.

Mr. Sub. Well, well, that may be; but still I say, that a Frenchman

Class. Is a fop; it is their national disease; not one of the qualities for which you celebrate them, but owes its origin to a foible; their taste is trifling, their gaiety grimace, and their politeness pride.

Mr. Sub. Hey-day! Why, what the deuce brings you to Paris then?

Class. A debt to friendship; not but I think a short residence here a very necessary part in every man of fashion's education.

Mr. Sub. Where's the use?

Class. In giving them a true relish for their own domestic happiness; a proper veneration

for their national liberties; a contempt for adulation; and an honour for the extended generous commerce of their country.

Mr. Sub. Why, there, indeed, you have the preference, Mr. Classic: the traders here are a sharp-set, cozening people; foreigners are their food; civilities with a-ay, ay! a congee for a crown, and a shrug for a shilling; devilish dear, Mr. Classic, devilish dear!

Class. To avoid their exactions, we are, Mr. Subtle, recommended to your protection.

Mr. Sub. Ay, and wisely they did who recom mended you: Buy nothing but on mine or my lady's recommendation, and your are safe. But where was your charge? Where was Mr. Buck last night? My lady made a party at cards on purpose for him, and my ward, Lucinda, is mightily taken with him; she longs to see him again.

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SCENE I-CARMINE'S Painting Room,

ACT I.

Enter CARMINE, followed by the Boy. Car. Lay these colours in the window, by the pallet. Any visitors, or messages?

Boy. 'Squire Feltree has been here, and insists upon Miss Racket's picture being immediately finished and carried home-As to his wife and children, he says, you may take your own time.

Car. Well

Boy. Here has been a message too from my Lady Pen-I can't remember her name, but 'tis upon the slate. She desires to know if you will be at home about noon,

Car. Fetch it. [Exit Boy.] Was the whole of our profession confined to the mere business of it, the employment would be pleasing as well as profitable; but, as matters are now managed, the art is the last thing to be regarded. Family

connections, private recommendations, and an easy, genteel method of flattering, is to supply the delicacy of a Guido, the colouring of a Rubens, and the design of a Raphael-all their qualities, centering in one man, without the first requisite, would be useless; and, with these, not one of these is necessary.

Enter Boy, with the slate.

Car. Let's see-Oh! lady Pentweazel from Blow-bladder-street-Admit her, by all means! and if Puff or Varnish should come, I am at home. [Exit Boy.] Lady Pentweazel! ha, ha! Now, here's a proof that avarice is not the only or last passion old age is subject to-This su perannuated beldame gapes for flattery, like a nest of unfledged crows for food; and with them, too, gulps down every thing that's offered her-no matter how coarse. Well, she shall be fed; I'll make her my introductory key to the whole bench of aldermen.

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