while he thus sows through the community the light-the earth cease to revolve on its axis-the seeds of discord, pregnant with a future harvest of armed men, he profanes the name of liberty by making her sacred cause the pretext for opening this magazine of mischief. whole frame-work of society fall into "most admired disorder," if his plans are not adopted. He is an empiric vaunting a panacea for every distemper-an elixir to renew the decaying vitality of When the Philodemian has exhibited such stri- the body politic. His philosophy offers but one king evidences of ardent love for the people, of solution to all problems-discerns but one cause uncalculating devotion to their interests, they must for all phenomena. The whole field of vision in his be churlish and distrustful indeed, could they with-political telescope is occupied by a mouse, which hold their confidence from such a zealous adhe- he mistakes for an elephant, and he is never weary rent, or refuse to commit to his tried fidelity the of proclaiming the notable discovery. He is posmanagement of public affairs. What a golden age sessed with an inveterate monomania, which preof universal happiness must prevail under such sents to his diseased mind all objects under one honest and beneficent rulers! Influenced by some image. He is haunted by a spectre, whose shadowy such process of reasoning, the people always re-form darkens and discolors all his perceptions, and ward the attachment of the Philodemian with posts this phantom he pursues with the reckless speed of dignity and profit. True, this was not his object. of the wild huntsman, trampling on every obstacle He had no selfish view. He thought only of the to his headlong course. weal of the dear people, to whom he had sworn The Hobbyhorsical is by no means tolerant of everlasting fealty. For them he consents to sac- difference in opinion. If a man obstinately refurifice his time, his repose-to exert all his talents se to see as he sees, he does not charitably asand energies. With laudable humility he confesses cribe it to defect of vision, but imputes the failure that his feeble abilities are unequal to the arduous to dishonesty of purpose. For himself, his sagatask, but he is constrained to obey the call of duty city can never be deceived. The whole human and patriotism. Some how or other, in spite of race may be in error, but he is always in the right. his indifference to personal advantage, he rises to Bigoted to his own notions, he is equally ready to power and consequence-he fills his coffers from become a martyr, and to inflict the tortures of marthe public purse, and then "his chariots roll like tyrdom. His opponents deserve no lenity at his meteors his palaces rise like exhalations." The hands, nor is he restrained by the cobweb restraints cringing, fawning, crawling creature casts his of courtesy from venting on those stubborn offendslough and glitters in the sunshine of prosperity a ers the full vials of his wrath. He befouls them dignitary and a millionaire. The charitable Man- with every loathsome epithet-he blackens them uel Ordonnez grew rich by keeping the funds of with the most infamous aspersions. In the phrenthe poor; and why should not the philanthropic zy of his rage, he is as unmindful of his own digPhilodemian enjoy a similar recompense for keep-nity, as he is steeled to the pleadings of mercy. ing the treasures of his beloved people? In their He gloats on the agonies of his victim, and is well mode of subsistence, these worthy and affectionate repaid for all this butchery by the unthinking apgentlemen have a striking resemblance to the vam- plauses of his followers. pyre bat of Guiana: they lull us into profound repose by their soothing adulation, while they drain insensibly the vital fluid from our system. There is a class of aspirants to greatness, dis-ment. If he discover that any particular institutinguished by a singular idiosyncracy, whom, on tion, or usage, or profession, or class of people has account of their peculiarities, I have designated by become obnoxious to a considerable number of men, the name of Hobbyhorsicals. These are men, then is the time for him to throw himself into the who seem to have but one idea, or in whose minds front rank-to concentrate into a focus the scatall other ideas are absorbed and swallowed up in tered elements of discord-to become a leader in some predominant and overmastering conception. the new crusade. By this timely intervention, the The Hobbyhorsical strives to make himself con- Hobbyhorsical, scarcely known beyond the limits spicuous by dedicating all his powers to one ques- of his own parish, suddenly shoots up into a man tion by repeating his delenda est Carthago, his of distinction, a perfect giant, whose slightest movefavorite doctrines on all occasions, both in season ment shakes the solid structure of society. The and out of season-by insisting that all other sub-process by which this transformation is effected, is jects are trivial, or important, according to their extremely simple. For example, let the Hobbyaffinity with that great purpose, which has become horsical ascertain that turnpikes are odious to many the business of his life. His master scheme is the persons and then devote himself with untiring perone constant burthen of his declamation, and he severance to the demolition of this imaginary grievwould fain persuade you, that the destinies of ance. Let him aver that turnpikes are an abridgethe human race hang suspended on the issue of ment of human liberty-an infringement of the his patriotic labors. The sun will refuse his freedom of locomotion-an oppressive monopoly, As the Hobbyhorsical is warmed into being in the hot-bed of popular prejudice, it behooves him to note carefully every fluctuation of public senti sire among us to subjugate that distracted country. Is there no plan which may reconcile our interest with our inclination in this matter? I think I have hit upon a happy expedient that obviates all objections, and I shall now proceed to disclose it. exacting tribute for the enjoyment of the common has already filled our country with bitter heartbounties of nature. Shall the poor man be taxed for burnings and alarming commotions, and what may the privilege of carrying his pig to market? Shall be the result of the conflict baffles all human forehe be hedged in by gates and bars on the surface cast. Is it not then important to inquire how this of that earth, which the Creator has bestowed on agitation may be tranquillized? how these meritoman as his common inheritance? Shall he be con- rious citizens, whose services might otherwise be strained to "keep to the right as the law directs," lost to mankind, may find a fit theatre for the diswhen both right and left are his by the law of na- play of their abilities? I flatter myself, that I ture, and by actual occupancy too, in the exhilara- have discovered the true solution of these difficultion of the midnight revel? Shall he yield his ties, and I shall proceed without delay to submit slender pittance to swell the overgrown wealth of the result of my reflections to the public. the capitalist—of the moneyed aristocracy? Com- Our statesmen seem to be somewhat at a loss for pute the annual amount of this contribution, and a sufficient reason to justify the subjugation of Mexyou will find that the sum total would extinguish ico. Considered as a mere mercantile question of the national debt-equip our armies and navies-profit and loss, indemnity for the past and security defray our civil expenditures-cover the land with for the future, would, certainly, furnish an adequate benevolent establishments and banish poverty from motive and excuse for the proposed conquest. Yet our country. Can this be endured by freemen? it is doubted by some accurate calculators, whether Let abolition of turnpikes, then, be the cry. Down the pecuniary recompense we expect to derive from with the monopolists. Down with the men who mea- the reduction of that country is altogether certain; sure to us the ground we tread on by the yard and whether, in fact, when the expense of overrunning extort a price for their usurpation. Let no share- and holding it is duly estimated, we shall not be holder, director, toll-gatherer, or favorer of turn- found to have gained a loss-a burthen, instead of pikes be elected to any office. Such men are usurp- a benefit. But notwithstanding this and other ers, tyrants, Shylocks, monsters unfit to be trusted. | weighty considerations, there exists a strong deTurnpikes can never be put down so long as their partisans are invested with power and influence. War and peace, the interests of commerce and agriculture, are bat secondary matters compared to this enormous grievance. The ball is thus put in motion, and a prejudice which might have vanished I assume as postulates, that our country is overgradually under the light of knowledge and expe- loaded with great men, and that the bulk of these rience, becomes inflamed to the highest degree of valuable citizens, even with our frequent elections virulence and inveteracy. The cry increases. The and rapid rotation in office, have not the most reenemies of turnpikes combine-hold meetings-mote prospect of gratifying their reasonable ambiadopt resolutions-concert their plan of action. tion within the ordinary limits of human life. Here The abolition of turnpikes is made the test of elec- then is, evidently, a great waste of mental power, tions, and at last it is determined that an anti-turn- and a grievous disappointment of the just hopes of pike President is the only antidote to all the ills of many well-deserving citizens-evils, which a pastate. The country becomes a scene of uproar rental government is, certainly, bound to redress. and confusion. The Hobbyhorsical "rides in the Again; the multitude and competition of the canwhirlwind and directs the storm," and his name is didates for distinction among us endanger our doechoed by the trumpet of fame through the four mestic peace, and keep our community in a perquarters of the globe. petual turmoil. That we should relieve ourselves From the practice of these various arts, great from this dangerous superfluity, with all convemen have so multiplied among us as actually to en-nient speed by transferring it to another market, cumber the body politic; and it becomes a serious and that on the principle of self-preservation, we question how the increasing surplus of these rest- may employ force to accomplish an object so esless and turbulent spirits can be safely disposed of. sential to our welfare, are propositions which seem At a rough calculation, there are, at this time, some to me to be perfectly clear and indisputable. And dozen, whose ambitious desires are fixed on the in doing so, we shall but imitate the example of next Presidency, besides some fifty or an hundred our Anglo-Saxon ancestors. For it was not a more, who are eagerly looking forward to the suc- scarcity of the means of subsistence produced by cession; all marvellous proper men and eminent- a growing population, as Malthus ingeniously conly qualified to direct the destinies of the nation. jectures, but the excessive numbers of their great To these are to be added the thousands of con-men, seeking in distant lands space for the display spicuous citizens, who, though not now aspiring of their civil and military talents, that drove the to the chief magistracy, are yet earnestly strug- northern tribes in such countless hordes upon the gling for all the other great prizes in the political southern countries of Europe. The leaders in lottery. The rivalship of this ambitious multitude those migrations, debarred at home from their nat J. B. D. ural place in society, by a too active competition, | nations of my readers to fill up the imperfect outsummoned to their standard the warlike and enter- line. prising youth of their country, and extorted from their effeminate neighbors that dominion which was the just due of their superior courage and capacity. And, in this irruption, they did but fulfil the universal law, that the strong should predominate over the weak. In invading Mexico, therefore, we vindicate the genuineness of our descent from the sea-kings of the north, and, luckily, the conquest of that country will furnish ample facilities for removing the evils and inconveniences to which I have adverted. Its extensive territories would give ample scope "and verge enough" to our supernumerary great men for the exercise of their abilities. From the inadequacy of the native supply, civil and military talents would be in demand in that market, and thus by transporting our surplus politicians to benighted Mexico, we should at once relieve their necessities and remove the dangers impending over us from the restless activity of that class of men. If the Mexicans refuse to acquiesce peaceably in this judicious arrangement, both precedent and principle would justify us in the application of coercive measures. Campbell county, Va. Feb. 4th, 1848. INVOCATION TO SLEEP. BY ALTON. Come soothing Sleep, and with thy magic charms, Turn on me, sweetly smiling, thro' her tears:- JOHN CARPER, THE HUNTER OF LOST RIVER. CHAPTER VI. When the whole country has been reduced to submission by the power of our arms, I propose that the conquered territory be laid off into a number of republics of suitable dimensions, and that such portion of our Presidential aspirants as we can best spare, be detailed forthwith to take charge of these infant governments. As some force may be requisite to maintain the authority of these magistrates, I suggest that a large number of officeseekers and office-holders be immediately shipped to Mexico and embodied as a corps d'armée; so that while they exercise civil functions in the new republics, they may act, at the same time, as an army of occupation. These classes of men abound so much among us that there can be no difficulty in obtaining an adequate force, and their peculiar habits would eminently fit them for such a service. They have a genius for what the French call the maraud, and would, therefore, cost but little in the The departure of ten of his twelve enemies led way of subsistence. Their military zeal and gal- to a change in Carper's plan. He determined to lantry, too, would be stimulated by the strongest wait long enough for the ten to get to a distance of motives of interest-by the consciousness that de- many miles, for so far he conjectured they would feat must dry up the sources of their official emol-travel-there being no habitation nearer than fif uments. Multitudes, I am persuaded, would be teen miles, and their errand being plainly of a predaready to volunteer on such an expedition. tory character-and then to deal boldly with the With a force thus constituted, the country two left behind. A cattle grazer of the South may easily be held in subjection, and under such Branch valley had established a man, named Daniel able teachers the debased and ignorant Mexican Ridgway, near some salt springs, in the mixed may be soon indoctrinated in the true principles of glade lands near Cheat River, about fifteen miles republican government. If I were to enumerate distant in a north-western direction. Ridgway had the manifold advantages of this scheme, I should built his cabin only two or three years before, and extend this essay to an inconvenient length; but Carper knew of it only from the report of hunters. lest I should be tempted to dilate too largely on its The party of ten were striking, he supposed, for merits, I must now conclude and rely on the imagi- this homestead, as their march had been begun in Now again,” he whispered, "roll out of your nest, and come with me. Be brave, but quiet. One to two is not odds for a true man to be afraid of in a good cause. We shall get back and be happy enough." that direction, and as there was no other habitation | his eye, and threw himself at a bound upon the nearer than thirty miles, in that, or any other di- stooping man. The Indian fell with his face to rection. It was impossible to know whether the the grass, under the onset, and before he could two Indians were to await, where they were, the make an effort to rise, or even cry out, the long return of their comrades, or to reunite with them at knife of the white hunter had ploughed its way some rendezvous on the general western route. upward from the fifth rib, dealing a terrible wound. More than an hour passed by. The hunter, find- Before the knife had sunk to its handle, the knees ing that the two Indians had become quiet, and that of the warrior had failed, and he was flat upon the the fire-light had died away into an occasional ground; he quivered and gasped, and was a dead ficker, drew himself back, and regained the side man. Carper seized Sharpnose promptly and preof his mistress. She was on the alert, and wel-vented the noise with which this faithful friend comed him with a pressure of the hand. He in- might have signalized the victory. The horse had quired, in a whisper, if she could guess at the pur- plunged away as he leaped upon the Indian, but pose of the party who had left the camp. She now stood still confined by the hobble; the hunter could give him no farther clue than he already pos- refastened him to the tree. Then he took his rifle sessed. and walked without caring whether he was heard or not, feeling sure that he would be mistaken for the Indian returning to the fire from an inspection of the horse, and so came within twenty paces of the comrade of the dead man. This poor devil still wore the night-cap and shawl. The failing Nelly followed her hunter on her hands and fire now flickered up, now sunk, giving out an unknees; Sharpnose, crouching along close to the certain light. Carper raised his rifle; he found ground, came last. Carper soon reached a point no small difficulty in getting his aim; the sights of for safely crossing the run. The Quakeress might the rifle were useless for want of light, and his eye have passed dry-shod upon the stones, but her had no better guide than the dusky line of the long stout lover would not miss the good excuse for his barrel. At last he fired. The Indian, instead of gallantry, and, lifting her in one arm, bore her to falling, jumped like a frog, from his sitting pothe other bank. Here, keeping upon his feet, he sition over the fire, knocking the brands with led the way and soon accomplished the necessary his feet, and rising, without stopping to pick up his circuit, and approached the tree to which he had rifle, scudded off into the woods. Carper dashed fastened the black horse. Now had arrived the into the glade and pressed after him. Sharptime for carrying into effect a stratagem which he nose ran before and disappeared; the hunter heard had devised in his meditations under the oak. He the dog yelp, then whine piteously. Hurrying on led Nelly into the gloom of the wood, where he as fast as he could in the darkness he met his dog bade her remain concealed, and then, returning, returning. He at once gave up the chase and reunfastened the black from the tree. He next felt traced his way to the fire. Here he discovered the priming in the pan of his rifle, and placed the that Sharpnose was bleeding from a gash in his side. handle of his knife within ready reach. Having The Indian had beaten him off with his tomahawk. done this, he took Sharpnose under one arm, and The cut was over the ribs and did not disable him carrying him to the head of the horse, made him or even hinder his seizing upon a venison bone understand a familiar signal, and snap sharply at from the refuse of the recent supper. The escape the animal's nostrils. The black stallion threw of the Indian added to Carper's haste to be gone. himself up with a simultaneous spring of all four He kicked the rifle of the fugitive into the run, callfeet from the ground, and snorted furiously. Car-ed through the dark woods to Nelly, mounted the per pressed the neck of the dog under his left foot, black horse, took her up behind him and rode away and cocked his rifle, imitating at the same instant northward. He left the pony, upon which she the snarl of a wolf. There was then a slight noise had before travelled, still hobbled, feeding in a in the direction of the fire--a rustle of the bushes grassy opening near at hand. I leave the converfollowed-and one of the Indians came stealthily sation of the lovers to be imagined by the reader, out into the grassy area, and stooped to examine except so much of it as may be necessary to an the hobble of the horse. He was within ten feet understanding of certain matters requiring explaof Carper, who had designed to shoot him, trusting nation. that the Indian left at the fire would mistake the "The horse seemed to kill the Indian of whom report of the rifle for that of a shot fired by his thee speaks," said Nelly in the midst of a dialogue comrade, to scare the wolves from the horses. occasionally interrupted by the bounding and irregThis was his first design, but the nearness and pos- ular motion of the brute, of which she spoke, ture of his enemy invited an onset of a different amongst the obstacles of their dark and often rough character. He leaned his rifle against a tree, and way. "When the party came in, bringing the drew his knife. He measured the distance with beast, that Indian took charge of him, and soon began shaking a blanket at his head and torment- | him best to ride north to the residence of William ing him. The Indians laughed very much at this. Crawford. The house of this widely known perThe man held the reins, and the horse, after draw-son was in fact a fort, and his family, and the laing back often, at last ran in upon him, beat him borers in his employment, made up a force amply down with his knees, and ran around him kicking sufficiently to prevent even an attempt of so small and making an angry noise. When the Indian's a party of Indians against it. Leaving Nelly at friends drove the horse from him he was apparently Crawford's he would return with all who were wildead. They placed him on the ground, wrapped ling to assist him, pursue the Indians, and eventain his blanket, with his weapons by his side, and ally recover the stolen horse and goods left on left him. Thee says that thee found him alive, Blackwater Run, and see to a decent disposition of but left him no longer so." the remains of the murdered boy. The Lost River hunters might be up in time to join with Crawford's men in the pursuit of the Indians. These views and purposes passed swiftly through his mind, and he lifted his horse's head to ride northward. Nell, at this moment, drew her arm tightly around his waist, and exclaimed in a husky voice"Look-look!" "Has Girty made love to you on the journey?" Carper asked at another stage of the conversation. "Thee should scarcely care if he had done so. But he did do so. And I tell thee frankly, dear John, for between thee and me there should be frankness, I answered gently. The lad, from whatever cause, was my protection against worse men." Her finger pointed westward. Carper instantly saw several mounted Indians dashing out from the "You make a great mistake Nelly; there is no wood that made the western boundary of the glade. worse man in the party than Girty." They were coming at full speed directly toward "More dangerous men, if not worse-if thee him. Here was cause of speedy flight, and that excepts to that word. He told me of his wigwam too in the direction of Crawford's, where safety on a stream clearer than Lost River, and insinu- might, with a few hours of hard riding, be obtainated many things about my being his wife in the ed-not in the direction of home, over a series of beautiful country, out in the west, where the earth wild uninhabited mountains. He struck the black is a field of grass and flowers. I did not say no to horse with his heels, shouted to him, and instead the youth, but, trusting in God, gravely listened to of riding directly away from his enemies, took a him. So Girty, wicked as he doubtless is, kept line across their course-Sharpnose running gal me safe from the rudeness of the others-placed lantly at his side. As he did so the Indians also the branches of trees for me to sleep upon, in places where the rude eyes did not watch me-and altogether behaved more after the manner of his civilized instruction at uncle Blake's than of his Indian blood and nature. Thee does not know me, John Carper, if from this seeming of yielding to the love-fancy of the youth, thee is of opinion that, in the end, succor being hopeless I would not have opposed the youth utterly--aye, even to such an act as slew Sisera." "I believe every thing you say, Nelly," replied Carper, moved by her firm words. "In your conduct to the lad you were as wise as you are pretty and good." The mountain on their right guided their course, and riding as rapidly as the darkness and nature of the ground well permitted-and these in fact presented greater impediments to their speed than the hunter, who had never traversed the country on turned as quickly as their speed would let them, and pursuers and pursued rode fast toward one point, an opening in the wood at the northern end of the glade. Carper's selection of this course of flight reduced the advantage which he had, at first, in the start; but he was still nearer, by more than two hundred yards, to the outlet, than his enemies. "This comes," muttered the hunter, lifting his rifle angrily and urging his horse to full speed, "this comes of missing that whelp of the devilmissing a fair shot. I might have known that the the course we took, be off on his long legs to bring rascal would dog us in the dark, and, after finding the whole gang down on us. Nelly I must run more than is agreeable-to save not only myself When running no longer answers, I must die game. It wont do for a man to give up and If it comes to the worst, subcry like a woman. but you. 66 horse-back before, had imagined-Carper and the mit yourself quietly and trust to Providence, and Quakeress came, a little after dawn, upon that the friends who must be coming on from home." Look," he said a moment after-" you sit in a large glade which modern travel first strikes in the How are they coming on?" route from Romney to Clarksburg. No traces of way to see them well. the Lost River hunters appeared. The Indian party, Carper supposed, were at a safe distance in the west. The fine rivulet of the Youheganey, recently sprung from its fountains, had been just crossed. He drew up his horse for a few minutes and meditated his future course. It seemed to 66 One rides first on a horse that runs as fast as a bird flies. Two others ride much behind. Some are coming on far back on foot." "Is the foremost man Girty?" "No; he is much greater in size. Thee will scarcely outstrip the first rider. He gains upon us. |