may hear, but not your master or lady, whom you must take care not to disturb or frighten at such unseasonable hours.

"Lay all faults upon a lap-dog, or favourite cat, a monkey, parrot, a child; or on the servant who was last turned off: by this rule you will excuse yourself, do no hurt to any body else, and save your master or lady from the trouble and vexation of chiding.

"When you want proper instruments for any work you are about, use all expedients you can invent, rather than leave your work undone. For instance, if the poker be out of the way, or broken, stir the fire with the tongs; if the tongs be not at hand, use the muzzle of the bellows, the wrong end of the fire-shovel, the handle of the fire-brush, the end of a mop, or your master's cane. If you want paper to singe a fowl, tear the first book you see about the house. Wipe your shoes, for want of a clout, with the bottom of a curtain, or a damask napkin. Strip off your livery lace for garters. If the butler wants a jordan, he may use the great silver cup.

"There are several ways of putting out candles, and you ought to be instructed in them all: you may run the candleend against the wainscot, which puts the snuff out immediately you may lay it on the ground, and tread the snuff out with your foot: you may hold it upside down, until it is choaked with its own grease; or cram it into the socket of the candlestick: you may whirl it round in your hand till it goes out: you may spit on your finger and thumb, and pinch the snuff till it goes out. The cook may run the candle's nose into the meal-tub, or the groom into a vessel of oats, or a lock of hay, or a heap of litter: the housemaid may put her candle out by running it against a look. ing-glass, which nothing cleans so well as candle-snuff: but the quickest and best of all methods is, to blow it out with your breath, which leaves the candle clear, and readier to be lighted.

"There is nothing so pernicious in a family as a tell-tale, against whom it must be the principal business of you all to unite: whatever office he serves in, take all opportunities to spoil the business he is about, and to cross him in every thing. For instance, if the butler be a tell-tale, break his glasses whenever he leaves the pantry door open; or lock the cat or the mastiff in it, who will do as well: mislay a fork or a spoon, so as he may never find it. If it be the cook, whenever she turns her back, throw a lump of soot or a handful of salt in the pot, or smoking coals into the dripping-pan, or daub the roast meat with the back of the chimney, or hide the key of the jack. If a footman be suspected, let the cook daub the back of his new livery; or

when he is going up with a dish of soup, let her follow him softly with a ladle-full, and dribble it all the way up stairs to the dining-room; and then let the house-maid make such a noise, that her lady may hear it. The waiting-maid is very likely to be guilty of this fault, in hopes to ingratiate herself: in this case, the laundress must be sure to tear her shifts in the washing, and yet wash them but half; and, when she complains, tell all the house that she sweats so much, and her flesh is so nasty, that she fouls a shift more in one hour, than the kitchen-maid deth in a week."

D

THE

COMPLETE SERVANT.

THE HOUSEKEEPER.

ALTHOUGH it is obvious that a good education can be no impediment to domestic management, but may be of material assistance in the furtherance of family comforts, yet it is pleasing to reflect that many of the essential duties of life are within the reach of less exalted attainments; and that the woman who has been reared in useful pursuits, and whose chief aim is to perform the social obligations, will seldom fail of acquitting herself with credit and satisfaction, and especially if accompanied with that well-directed ductility of mind which bends its attention to the lesser objects of life, and is frequently found to be essential in the management of a family.

A housekeeper possessed of such facilities, as a ground-work for other qualifications, must be a desirable acquisition in a family where the mistress is of rank and consideration, and feels herself superior to the management of her own household affairs. Indeed, the situation of a housekeeper, in almost every family, is of great importance.-She superintends nearly the whole of the domestic.

establishment,-has generally the controul and direction of the servants, particularly of the female servants-has the care of the household furniture and linen-of all the grocery— dried and other fruits, spices, condiments, soap, candles, and stores of all kinds, for culinary and other domestic uses. She makes all the pickles, preserves, and sometimes the best pastry-She generally distils and prepares all the compound and simple waters, and spirits, essential and other oils, perfumery, cosmetics, and similar articles that are prepared at home, for domestic purposes. In short, she is the locum tenens, the Lady Bountiful, and the active representative of the mistress of the family; and is expected to do, or to see done, every thing that appertains to the good and orderly management of the household.

She ought to be a steady middle-aged woman, of great experience in her profession, and a tolerable knowledge of the world.-In her conduct, she should be moral, exemplary, and assiduous, as the harmony, comfort, and economy of the family will greatly depend on her example; and she must know, that no occurrence can be too trifling for her attention, that may lead to these results, and whereby waste and unnecessary expense may be avoided.

When the entire management of the servants is deputed to her, her situation becomes the more arduous and important. She will invite and excite their integrity, frugality, and assiduity, by her own liberal conduct towards them, and will shew them, that "according to their pains will be their gains." Thus will she give encouragement to merit, ensure to herself respectful attention, inspire zeal, and