Conclufion of Mr. SCRIP's Hiftory; with a Vifit to Bedlam.

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HEN we arriv'd at that hofpital, I cou'd not help admiring thofe two figures plac'd over the entrance, reprefenting melancholy madnefs, and raving. But common place praises are fo eafy to make, and the terms of art fo hackney'd, that I forbear any eulogium on thofe pieces of fculpture, leaft it may be thought, I only extol them to exhibit my own capacity, as a connoiffeur.

Yet it is pity fo little care has been taken of two fuch excellent figures, that we have neither cafts, models, or drawings of them; expofed to the weather, they are decaying; no more minded, than the weather-beaten roof of a country cottage.

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It is not, indeed, to be expect ed, that immenfely polite perfonages fhou'd admire fuch figures, the fubjects fhocking, for the extreme delicacy of the prefent tafte; although ladies permit Chinese moniters, and potbelly'd mandarins to be in their apartments. Those are foreign figures, and

therefore must be vaftly entertaining; but fuch English frights as madmen, and made at home too, must be horridly fhocking, and vaftly low.

Another reason, why thefe excellent pieces of ftatuary are not more famous, is, they are put up in a part of the town, which is never vifited, by any of theConnoiffeur club, or of the Diletanti or Virtu's; without (as very often is the cafe) thofe gentlemen critics are brought there as lodgers.

Neither can they be often mentioned at great men's tables, becaufe no artist ever publish'd any books about them; to point out their feveral beauties, there. fore,the elocutionists and dabblers in the arts and fciences, who are fo eager to fhow their tasteful talents, and harangue upon the merits of the ancient, and demerits of the modern artifts, and fo elaborately run on from the fhafts of the columns of Balbeck, to the flutings of a north country cockle thell, for want of being taught what to fay, not having any books to ftudy their parts by, are forc'd to be mute. Most modern profeffors of tafte, being only parroted into judgment; and repeat their leffons,

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In the middle of the floor or way, as we walk'd up and down the ward, there were three or four patients playing at chuck with halfpence; them I took to be gamblers; but the guide we had with us declar'd, that he knew them all before they came in, and that they never gam'd in their life-times, until they loft their fenfes.

I enquir'd of him, if ever they had any gamblers confin'd as Lunatics. No, Sir, our guide reply'd, they fend us a great many madinen, but are never mad enough to come here themfelves, except one, and we were forc'd to turn him out of the houfe; for when he got well enough to be allowed the liberty of walking up and down the wards, he us'd to pick peoples pockets of their handkerchiefs, as he pretended to show them the house.

Across us stalk'd a man, who had no other covering than a blanket, neither wou'd he wear any other; because, as he told us, Adam was cloath'd in fiefh, but for himfelf he was a Preadamite.

I told our guide this man was too. mad to be trusted loose, Ah, dear Sir, he replied, fhaking his head, Why, Sir, there are leveral pcople fo fond of his doctrine, that we shou'd lose taking pounds if we were to fhut him up. Sir, here are several females come to him, to be converted; and we are apt to. believe, that his doctrine is like a chaple of cafe to methodifm.

I then felt myfelf pluck'd by the fleeve; and, turning about, faw a little figure at my elbow, with a very ordinary waistcoat on, a flannel night cap, and a beard about half a year's growth, who begg'd I wou'd give him some tobacco, and he wou'd communicate fome fecrets to us.

Accordingly we follow'd him into his room; he told us, that the government had confin'd him there, because he wou'd not difcover to them the fecret of making gold; for, gentlemen, I have the philofopher's ftone. You may talk of your pay-masters, and your army, and navy contractors, commiffa

ries or ftock-jobbers, having the grand magifterium; they have not; it's only wheels within wheels with them. Mine is the opus operatum only. However, my country's ungrateful, the fecret fhall die with me; but I like you,, and I'll make your fortunes, by giving you fome other noftrums.

Out of a deal box he pull'd several parcels, and giving me one, told me, it was an elixir drawn from cobwebs to cure fquinting; that Mr. Jacob Hen-. riques has promis'd him to follicit a patent for him; but the only objection: which was made against it was, that, people now-a-days were not to look strait forwards.

Then he gave me a phial, which he faid was the cffence of charcoal, and a great specific, to prevent hair turning grey; and to cure the Gout, Leprofy, and Palíy.

We took our leaves of him; and affur'd him, we were highly oblig'd to him."

The confining of this fecret-maker,. was, I thought, a lofs to the world; because his noftrums might be, and ve ry likely were, as good in their kind, as any other of the prefent advertis'd univerfal medicines.

Every Toyhop is turned a Difpenfa-: ry, and every Chandler's Shop diftibutes medicine, for all forts of difeafes; and while the fquabble of party. prevents our fuperiors from attending to those empericks, thefe advertising quacks poilon whole parithes with impunity.

The Bedlam doctor, as a madman, fancy'd he was right in what he did, and acted uniformly from that fancy. But what name can we give to thole, who purchate Elixirs, Jejuits Drops, Grek Water, Lotions, Innocent Compounds; and feveral more obnoxious preparations ?

All the difference between his drugs. and theirs is, that in Bedlam it is a madman who has made the compofitions; and there which are fold without, the makers are in their fenfee; it is only the buyers who are Lunatics.

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T our return from Moorfields, I was agreeably furpriz'd to find Mrs. Scrip there, and in a tranquillity of mind I cou'd not have expected.

And I wish every wit, every fine gentleman, and all the other fet of felf-fufficient beings, who think it fo extreamly advantageous to their representations, to be continually ridiculing marriage, and condemning the tender, the delicate fentiments which wives can fo amiably express, had but been witnefs to the behaviour of my friend's wife.

Not a fyllable of reproach escaped her, for all which she had suffered, from the indifcretions of her husband; not one forrowful retrospection on her side, of what the had been: no, on the contrary, fhe comforted her husband, bid him rely on that Providence, which had already fo unexpectedly reliev'd them from the depth of mifery. Then the gratefully address'd herself to us,and while the was thus charming us all, with that delicacy, which, though it is impoffible to defcribe, is fo eafy for true politeness to use, I cou'd not help thinking, low contemptible our school declamations were, of Pedantic Philofaphy. How infipid our coffee-house political harangues for national or notional good. What were they to one half hour of a fine tender fenfible woman's converfation; what all our tavern repartees, jollities, comm onplace ftories, fentiments or betts making; I grew afham'd of myself, and my fex; and was convinc'd spite of pride, to acknowledge, THAT NATURE'S

NICEST ACCOMPLISHMENTS BELONG

NOT TO THE MALE,BUTFEMALE PART

OF HUMAN KIND.

While I was indulging myself with one of the most amiable family pictures I ever faw, which was, the regard this lately fo very an unhappy couple paid each to the other; a clergyman, an intimate and old acquaintance of mine, fent his name in, and defir'd to speak to me immediately.

I waited on him at the coffee-house mentioned in his note; he told me, he had troubled me to enquire concerning Mr. and Mrs. Scrip; that a valuable eftate, by the fudden deaths of the three fucceeding heirs, came to them.

Immediately I inform'd him of their ftory. We thought it not proper to acquaint them at once with their fudden good fortune.

But by degrees, we let them know how happy they were in refpect to circumftances.

We fet out for the country together; they begg'd I wou'd accompany them to take poffeffion; and I had that heartelating fatisfaction to see them in a state of unaffected tranquillity. To me this was an inexpreffible pleasure. What more can delight the human mind, than to fee worthy objects of his own fpecie happy? Is 25 per cent. accumulations, capable of bringing home fuch joy to the heart? Statesmen, Penfionaries and Favourites, what fay you? Unknown to ye all are fuch focial enjoyments; for, contrary to the receiv'd maxims of what the world may hold, Ye live not for yourselves; and yet at the fame time cannot enjoy pleasure from what you do to others; because you are confcious, that it is INTEREST, and not ESTEEM, which buys and fells between you.

End of Mr. Scrip's Hiftory.

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Apollo,