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SCENE I.-A room in Mrs Goodman's house. , sits write, write, write, all day long, scribbling &
1 pack of nonsense for the newspapers !-You're Enter Molly, struggling with SPATTER. fit for nothing above a chambermaid. Mol. Be quiet, Mr Spatter! let me alone!! Spat. That's as much as to say, that you think Pray now, sir! It is a strange thing a body can't me just fit for you. Eh, child? go about the house without being pestered with Mol. No, indeed; not I, sir. Neither my lady your impertinence-Why sure !
nor I will have any thing to say to you. Spat. Introduce me to your mistress, then Spat. Your mistress and you both give yourcome, there's a good girl !--and I will teaze you selves a great many airs, my dear. Your pono longer.
verty, I think, might pull down your pride. Mol. Indeed I shan't-Introduce you to my
Mol. What does the fellow mean by poverty ? lady! for wbat, pray?
Spat. I mean, that you are starving. Spat. Oh! for a thousand things. To laugh, Mol. Oh the slanderous monster! We! Startto chat, to take a dish of tea, to
ing! Who told you so? I'd have you to know, Mol. You drink tea with my lady! I should sir, my lady has a very great fortune. not have thought of that-On what acquaint Spat. So 'tis a sign, by her way of life and apance?
pearance. Spat. The most agrecable in the world, child ! Mol. Well; she lives privately, indeed, bea new acquaintance.
cause she loves retirement; she goes plain, beMol. Indeed, you mistake yourself mightily cause she hates dress; she keeps no table, beyou are not a proper acquaintance for a person cause she is an enemy to luxury-In short, my of her quality, I assure you, sir !
lady is as rich as a Jew, and you are an imperSpat. Why, what quality is she, then ?
tinent coxcomb! Mol. Much too high quality for your acquaint- Spat. Come, come! I know more of your ance, I promise you. What! a poet-man! that / mistress than you imagine.
Mol. And what do you know of her? | they will take all the care in their power, that I Spat. Oh, I know what I know.
shall not find them out-But I may be too hard Mol. Well!
[Alarmed. for you yet, young gentlewoman! I have earned Spat. I know who she is, and where she came but a poor livelihood by mere scandal and abuse ; from; I am very well acquainted with her fa- | but if I could once arrive at doing a little submily, and know her whole history.
stantial mischief, I should make my fortune. Mol. How can that be? Spat. Very easily—I have correspondence
Enter Mrs GOODMAN. everywhere. As private as she may think her-Oh! your servant, Mrs Goodman ! Yours is the self, it is not the first time that I have seen or most unsociable lodging-house in town. So mau heard of Amelia.
ladies, and only one gentleman! and you won't Mol. Oh gracious! as sure as I am alive this take the least notice of him. man will discover us ! [Apart.] Mr Spatter, my Mrs Good. How so, Mr Spatter? dear Mr Spatter! if you know any thing, sure Spat. Why, did not you promise to introduce you would not be so cruel as to betray us! me to Amelia?
Spat. My dear Mr Spatter! O ho! I have Mrs Good. To tell you the plain truth, Mr guessed right, there is something then? Spatter, she don't like you. And, indeed, I don't
Mol. No, sir, there is nothing at all; nothing know how it is, but you make yourself a great that signifies to you or any body else.
many enemies. Spat. Well, well. I'll say nothing; but then, | Spat. Yes, I believe I do raise a litte enry. you must
Mrs Good. Indeed you are mistaken, sir. As Mol. What?
you are a lodger of mine, it makes me quite urSpat. Come; kiss me, bussy !
easy to hear what the world says of you. How Mol. I say kiss you, indeed!
do you contrive to make so many enemies, Mr Spat. And you'll introduce me to your mis- Spatter? tress?
"Spat. Because I have merit, Mrs Goodman. Mol. Not I, I promise you.
Mrs Good. May be so; but nobody will allow Spat. Nay, no mysteries between you and me, it but yourself. They say that you set up for a child! Come; here's the key to all locks, the wit, indeed; but that you deal in nothing but clue to every maze, and the discloser of all se- scandal, and think of nothing but mischief. crets; money, child ! Here, take this purse; you Spat. I do speak ill of the men sometimes, to see I know something; tell me the rest, and I be sure ; but then, I have a great regard for wo have the fellow to it in my pocket.
men--provided they are handsome: and, that I Mol. Ha, ha, ha! poor Mr Spatter! Where may give you a proof of it, introduce me to Amecould you get all this money, I wonder! Not by lia. your poetries, I believe. But what signifies tell- Mrs Good. You must excuse me; she and you ing you any thing, when you are acquainted with would be the worst company in the world; for our whole history already? You have correspond she never speaks too well of herself, nor the least ence everywhere, you know. There, sir ! take ill of any body else. And then her virtue up your filthy purse again, and remember, that I Spat. Pooh, pooh! she speaks ill of nobody, scorn to be obliged to any body but my mistress. because she knows nobody; and as for her virtue,
Spat. There's impudence for you! when, to ha, ha! my certain knowledge, your mistress has not a Mrs Good. You don't believe much in that, I guinea in the world; you live in continual fear suppose ? of being discovered; and you will both be utter- / Spat. I have not overmuch faith, Mrs Goodly undone in a fortnight, unless lord Falbridge man. Lord Falbridge, perhaps, may give a betshould prevent it, by taking Amelia under huis ter account of it. protection. You understand me, child ?
Mrs Good. Lord Falbridge can say nothing Mol. You scandalous wretch! Did you ever but what would be extremely to her honour, I hear such a monster? I won't stay a moment assure you, sir. (SPATTER laughs.] Well, well, longer with him-But you are quite mistaken you may laugh, but it is very true. about me and my mistress, I assure you, sir. We Spat. Oh, I don't doubt it; but you don't tell are in the best circumstances in the world; we the whole truth, Mrs Goodınan. When any of have nothing to fear; and we don't care a far- your friends or acquaintance sit for their picthing for you—So your servant, Mr Poet! tures, you draw a very flattering likeness. All
Erit. characters have their dark side; and if they bare Spat. Your servant, Mrs Pert! “ We are in but one eye, you give them in profile. Your the best circumstances in the world.” Ay, that great friend, Mr Freeport, for instance, whom is as much as to say, they are in the utmost dis- you are always praising for his benevolent actress. “We have nothing to fear.”—That is, / tions they are frightened out of their wits" And we Mrs Good. He is benevolence itself, sir. don't care a farthing for you."- Meaning, that Spat. Yes, and grossness itself, too. I remem
ber him these many years. He always cancels / Sir Wil. Lordship! I am no lord, sir, and must an obligation by the manner of conferring it; and beg not to be honoured with the name. does you a favour, as if he were going to knock Spat. It is a kind of mistake, that cannot disyou down.
please at least. Mrs Good. A truce with your satire, good Mr Sir Wil. I don't know that. None but a fool Spatter! Mr Freeport is my best friend; I owe would be vain of a title, if he had one; and none him every thing; and I can't endure the slightest but an impostor would assume a title, to which reflection on his character. Besides, he can have he has no right. given no offence to Lady Alton, whatever may be Spat, Oh, you're of the house of commons, the case with Amelia.
then, a meinber of parliament, and are come up Spat. Lady Alton! she is a particular friend to town to attend the sessions, I suppose, sir? of mine to be sure ; but, between you and me, Sir Wil. No matter what I am, sir. Mrs Goodman, a more ridiculous character than Spat. Nay, no offence, I hope, sir. All I meant any you have mentioned. A bel esprit forsooth! was to do you honour. Being concerned in two and as vain of her beauty as learning, without evening posts, and one morning paper, I was wilany great portion of either. A fourth grace, and ling to know the proper manner of announcing a tepth muse! who fancies herself enamoured of your arrival. Lord Falbridge, because she would be proud of Sir Wil. You have connexions with the press, such a conquest; and has lately bestowed some then, it seems, sir? marks of distinction on me, because she thinks it Spat. Yes, sir; I am an humble retainer to the will give her credit among persons of letters. Muses, an author. I compose pamphlets on all
Mrs Good. Nay, if you can't spare your own subjects, compile magazines, and do newspapers. friends, I don't wonder at your attacking mine Sir Wil. Do newspapers! What do you mean and so, sir, vour humble servant. But stay ! | by that, sir? here's a post-chaise stopped at our door; and Spat. That is, sir, I collect the articles of news here comes a servant with a portmanteau. 'Tis from the other papers, and make new ones for the gentleman for whom my first floor was taken, the postscript; translate the mails, write occaI suppose.
sional letters from Cato and Theatricus, and give Spat. Very likely: well, you will introduce me fictitious answers to supposed correspondents. to him at least, Mrs Goodman.
Sir Wil. A very ingenious, as well as honour
able employment, I must confess, sir. Enter a Servant with a portmanteau-SIR WIL
Spat. Some little genius is requisite, to be LIAM DOUGLAS following.
sure. Now, sir, if I can be of any use to youSir Wil. You are Mrs Goodman, I suppose, / if you have any friend to be praised, or any enemadam?
| my to be abused; any anthor to cry up, or miniMrs Good. At your service, sir.
ster to run down; my pen and talents are enSir Wil. Mr Owen, I believe, has secured tirely at your service. apartments here?
| Sir Wil. I ain much obliged to you, sir; but, at Mrs Good. He has, sir.
present, I have not the least occasion for either. Sir Wil. They are for me, madam-Have you | In return for your genteel offers, give me leave any other lodgers ?
to trouble you with one piece of advice. When Mrs Good, Only that gentleman, sir; and a you deal in private scandal, have a care of the young lady
cudgel; and when you meddle with public matSpat. Of great beauty and virtue. Eh, Mrs ters, beware of the pillory. Goodman?
Spat, How, sir ! are you no friend to literaMrs Good. She has both, sir; but you will see ture? Are you an enemy to the liberty of the very little of her, for she lives in the most retired press? manner in the world.
Sir Wil. I have the greatest respect for both; Sir Wil. Her youth and beauty are matter of but railing is the disgrace of letters, and personal great indifference to me; for I shall be as much abuse the scandal of freedom: foul-mouthed a recluse as herself.- Is there any news at pre-critics are, in general, disappointed authors; and sent stirring in London?
they, who are the loudest against ministers, only Mrs Good. Mr Spatter can inform you, sir, mean to be paid for their silence. for he deals in news. In the mean while, I'll Spal. That may be sometimes, sir; but give prepare your apartments.
me leave to ask you[Erit, followed by the servant.- SIR Sir Wil. Do not ask me at present, sir! I see
WILLIAM walks up and down, without a particular friend of mine coming this way, and taking notice of SPATTER.
I inust beg you to withdraw ! Spat. (Aside) This must be a man of quality, Spat. Withdraw, sir! first of all, allow me by his ill manners. I'll speak to him. Will to your lordship give me leave
Sir Wil. Nay, no reply! we must be in pri(To SIR William. vate.
[Thrusting out SPATTER, Vol. IL
What a wretcli! as contemptible as mischievous. Owen. Be advised; depart, and leare that care Our generous mastiffs fly at men from an instinct to me. Consider, your life is now at stake. of courage; but this fellow's attacks proceed from Sir Wil. My life has been too miserable to an instinct of baseness— But here comes the render me very solicitous for its preservationfaithful Owen, with as many good qualities as But the complection of the times is changed; that execrable fellow seems to have bad ones. the very name of the party, in which I was un
happily engaged, is extinguished, and the whole Enter Owen.
nation is unanimously devoted to the throne. Well, Owen; I am safe arrived, you see.
Disloyalty and insurrection are now no more, Owen. Ah, sir! would to heaven you were as and the sword of justice is suffered to sleep. If safe returned again! Have a care of betraying I can find my child, and find her worthy of me, yourself to be sir William Douglas !--During I will fly with her to take refuge in some foreign your stay here, your name is Ford, remember. country; if I am discovered in the searcb, I have
Sir Wil. I shall take care-But tell me your still some hopes of mercy. news-What have you done since your arrival ? Owen. Heaven grant your hopes may be well Have you heard any thing of my daughter? Have founded! you seen lord Brumpton? Has he any hope of Sir Wil. Come, Owen ! let us behave at least obtaining my pardon?
with fortitude in our adversity! Follow me to Owen. He had, sir.
my apartment, and let us consult what measures Sir Wil. And what can have destroyed it, we shall take in searching for Amelia. Escurt. then?
Owen. My lord Brumpton is dead, sir. SCENE II.-Changes to Amelia's apartment.
Enter Amelia and Molly. good health; he promised to exert bis whole in Ame. Poor Molly! to be teased with that terest in your favour: by his own apoointment Iodious fellow, Spatter! went to wait on him yesterday noon, when I was Mol. But, madam, Mr Spatter says he is acstunned with the news of his having died sudden- quainted with your whole history. ly the evening before.
Ame. Mere pretence, in order to render himSir Ilil. My lord Brumpton dead! the only self formidable. Be on your guard against hiin, friend I had remaining in England; the only per- my dear Moily; and remember to conceal my son, on whose intercession I relied for my par- nisery from him and all the world. I can bear don. Cruel fortune! I have now no hope bat to poverty, but am not proof against insult and confind my daughter. Tell me, Owen; have you tempt. been able to hear any tidings of her?
Mol. Ah, my dear mistress, it is to no purpose Owen. Alas, sir, none that are satisfactory. to endeavour to hide it from the world. Ther On the death of Mr Andrews, in whose care you will see poverty in my looks. As for you, you lett her, being cruelly abandoned by the relation can live upon the air; the greatness of your who succeeded to the estate, she left the country soul seems to support you; but, lack-a-day! I some months ago, and has not since been heard shall grow thinner and thinner every day of my
life. Sir Wil. Unhappy there, too! When will the Ame. I can support my own distress, but yours measure of my misfortunes be full ? When will touches me to the soul. Poor Molly! the labour the malice of my fate be satisfied ? Proscribed, of my hands shall feed and clothe you-Here! condemned, attainted, (alas, but too justly!) i dispose of this embroidery to the best advantage; have lost my rank, my estate, my wife, my son, what was formerly my amusement, must now beand all my family! One only daughter remains ! come the means of our subsistence. Let us be Perhaps a wretched wanderer, like myself, per- obliged to nobody, but owe our support to inlaps in the extremest indigence, perhaps disho-dustry and virtue. noured-Ha! that thought distracts me!
Mol. You're an angel ! let me kiss those dear Ouen. My dear master, have patience! Do bands that have worked this precious embroinot be ingenious to torment yourself, but consult dery ! let me bathe them with my tears! You're your safety, and prepare for your departure. an angel upon carth. I had rather starve in your
Sir Wil. No, Oven. Hearing, providentially, service, than live with a princess. What can I of the death of my friend Andrews, paternal care do to comfort you? and tenderness drew me hither; and I will not Ame. Thou faithful creature-only continue to quit the kingdom, till I learn soinething of my be secret : you know my real character; you child, my dear Amelia, whom I left a tender in- know I am in the utmost distress: I have opened nocent, in the arms of the best of women, twenty my heart to you, but you will plant a dagger years ago. Her sex demands protection; and there, if you betray me to the world. she is now of an age, in which she is more expo- Mol. Ah, my dear mistress, how should I be sou to misfortunes, than even in helpless infancy. tray you! I go no where, I converse with nobody
but yourself and Mrs Goodman : besides, the dam, sends her compliments, and will wait upon world is very indifferent about other people's you after dinner. misfortunes.
Mrs Good. Very well; my best respects to her Ame. The world is indifferent, it is true; but ladyship, and I shall be ready to attend ber. it is curious, and takes a cruel pleasure in tear [Erit Servant.] There, there is one cause of ing open the wounds of the unfortunale.
your uneasiness! Lady Alton's visit is on your
account. She thinks you have robbed her of Enter Mrs GOODMAN.
lord Falbridge's affections, and that is the oc
casion of her honouring me with her company. Mrs Goodman !
Ame. Lord Falbridge's affections ! Mrs Good. Excuse me, madam: I took the Mrs Good. Ah! my dear Amelia, you don't liberty of waiting on you to receive your com- know your power over his heart. You have remands. 'Tis now near three o'clock. You have conciled it to virtue-But come! let me prevail provided nothing for dinner, and have scarce on you to come with ine to dinner, taken any refreshment these three days.
Ame. You must excuse ine. Ame. I have been indisposed.
Mrs Good. Well, well, then I'll send you Mrs Good. I am afraid you are more than in something to your own apartment. If you have disposed---You are unhappy-Pardon me! but I any other commands, pray honour me with them, cannot help thinking that your fortune is unequal for I would fain oblige you, if I knew how it to your appearance.
were in my power.
Erit. Ame. Why should you think so ? You never Ame. What an amiable woman! If it had not beard me complain of my fortune.
been for her apparent benevolence and goodness Mrs Good. No, but I have too much reason of heart, I should have left the house on Mr to believe it is inferior to your merit,
Spatter's coming to lodge in it. Ame. Indeed, you flatter me.
Mol. Lady Alton, it seems, recommended him Mrs Good. Come, come ; you must not indulge as a lodger here; so he can be no friend of this melancholy. I have a new lodger, an elder- yours on that account; for to be sure she owes ly gentleman, just arrived, who docs ine the hon- you no good will on account of my lord Falour to partake of my dinner ; and I must have | bridge. your company, too. He seems to be in trouble, Ame. No more of lord Falbridge, I beseech as well as you. You must meet; two persons you, Molly. How can you persist in mentioning in affliction may perbaps become a consolation him, when you know, that, presuming on my situto each other. Come, let us take some care of ation, he has dared to affront me with dishonouryou.
able proposals ? Ame. Be assured, Mrs Goodman, I am much Mol. Ah, inadam, but he sorely repents it, I obliged to you for your attention to me; but I promise you, and would give his whole estate want nothing.
for an opportunity of seeing you once more, and Mrs Good. Dear madam! you say you want geting into your good graces again. nothing, and you are in want of every thing. Ame. No; his ungenerous conduct has thrown
him as much below me, as my condition had Enter Servant.
placed me beneath him. He imagined he had a
right to insult my distress; but I will teach him Ser. (To Mrs Goodman.] Lady Alton, ma- to think it respectable.
SCENE I.-An apartment at Mrs GOODMAN's. / standing. I begin to suspect you bave betrayed
me; you have gone over to the adverse party, Enter LADY ALTON and SPATTER.
and are in the conspiracy to abuse me.
Spat. I, madam! Neither her beauty, nor her Spat. But you won't hear me, madam! virtue
Lady Alt. I have heard too much, sir! This Lady Alt. Her beauty! her virtue! Why, wandering incognita a woman of virtue! I have thou wretch, thou grub of literature, whom I, as no patience.
a patroness of learning and encourager of meu Spat. Mrs Goodman pretends to be convinced of letters, willing to blow the dead coal of geof her being a person of honour.
nius, fondly took under my protection, do you reLady Alt. A person of honour, and openly re-member what I have done for you? ceive visits from men ! seduce lord Falbridge! Spat. With the utmost gratitude, madam. No, no ! reserve this character for your next Lady Alt. Did not I draw you out of the garnovel, Mr Spatter! it is an affront to my under-ret, where you daily spun out your flimsy brain