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worth being tickled by others neither, he is reduced to tickle himself, his own ears alone receive titillation from his own efforts. I know an eminent performer of this kind, who, by being nearly related to a skilful public-tickler, would fain set up for business himself; but has met with 'such repeated discourage ments, that he is reduced to the mortifying resource of self-titillation, in which he commits the most horrid excesses.
Besides the proofs above-mentioned of the influence of the ear in this country, many
of our most common phrases and expressions (from whence the genius of a people may always be collected) demonstrate that the ear is reckoned the principal and most predominant part of our whole mechanism: as for instance
To have the ear of one's prince, is understood by every body to mean, having a good share of his authority, if not the whole; which plainly hints how that influence is acquired,
To have the ear of the first minister, is the next, if not an equal advantage. I am therefore not surprised that so considerable a possession should be so frequently attempted, and sa eagerly solicited, as we may always observe it is. But I must caution the person who would make his fortune in this way, to confine his at
tempts strictly to the ear in the singular num. ber; a design upon the ears, in the plural, of a first minister, being for the most part rather difficult and dangerous, however just.
To give ear to a person, implies giving credit, being convinced, and being guided by that person ; all this by the success of his endea. vours upon that prevailing organ.
To lend an ear is something less, but still intimates a willingness and tendency in the lender, to be prevailed upon by a little more tick. ling in that part. Thus the lending of an ear is a sure presage of success to a skilful tickler. For example ; a person who lends an ear to a minister, seldom fails of putting them both in his power soon afterwards; and when a fine woman lends an ear to a lover, she shews a disposition at least to further and future titillation.
To be deaf, and stop one's ears, are common and known expressions to signify a total refusal and rejection of a person or proposition; in which case I have often observed the manual application to succeed by a strong vellication or vigorous percussion of the outward membranes of the ear. There cannot be a stronger instance of the great value that has always been
these parts, than the constant manner
of expressing the utmost and most ardent desire people can have for any thing, by saying they would give their ears for it. A price so great, that it is seldom either paid or required; witness the number of people actually wearing their ears still, who in justice have long since forfeited them.
Over head and ears, would be a manifest pleonasmus (the head being higher than the ears), were not the ears reckoned so much more valuable than all the rest of the head, as to make it a true climax.
It were unnecessary to mention, as farther proofs of the importance and dignity of those organs, that pulling, boxing, or cutting off the ears, are the highest insults that choleric men of honour can either give or receive, which shews that the ear is the seat of honour as well as of pleasure.
The anatomists have discovered, that there is an intimate correspondence between the palm of the hand and the ear; and that a previous application to the hand communicates itself instantly, by the force and velocity of attraction, to the ear, and agreeably prepares that part to receive and admit of titillation. I must say too, that I have known this practised with success upon very considerable persons of both sexes.
Having thus demonstrated, by many instances, that the ear is the most material
part in the whole mechanism of our structure; and that it is both the seat and source of honour, power, pleasure, and pain ; I cannot conclude without an earnest exhortation to all my country folks, of whatsoever rank or sex, to take the utmost care of their ears.
Guard your ears, O ye princes ! for your power is lodged in your
Guard your ears, ye nobles ! for your honour lies in your ears.
Guard your ears, ye fair! if ye would guard your virtue. And guard your ears, all my fellow-subjects ! if
would guard your liberties and properties.
Fog's JOURNAL, Jan, 24, 1736.
-Curb this cruel curiosity.
I have always been told, that true bravery, and true good sense, were accompanied with compassion and benevolence; and cannot help being surprised, that a nation so justly famous for the two former virtues, should give any room to have it said they are deficient in the latter. I am afraid, on examination, they will be found to do this but too palpably; else why this stagnation of all pursuits, all avocations, all subjects of discourse, but such as relate to those unhappy persons who either actually have, or are expected to suffer under the hands of the executioner?
Why, when any of those spectacles of horror are exhibited, does the tradesman forsake his