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النشر الإلكتروني

No. XLI.

Quæ virtus, et quanta boni, sit vivere parvo,

Discite.

-Vides ut pallidus omnis

Cœna desurgat dubia !

-Grandes rhombi, patinæque,

Grande ferunt cum damno dedecus.

HORAT.

What and how great the virtue, friends, to live
On what the gods with frugal bounty give,

Come learn with me.

Behold how pale the sated guests arise

From suppers puzzled with varieties!

Behold what infamy and ruin rise

From a large dish where the large turbot lies!

As I am naturally blest with a robust and healthy constitution, which I have taken care to preserve by regularity and temperance, I scarce knew what pain or sickness mean, any otherwise than by the complaints of others; and though I am far advanced in life, enjoy my strength, my appetite, and all my senses, perfect and entire, without finding any considerable difference in myself, but that happy one of being now able to control my passions, and keep them under the command of reason, much easier than in my youth. I am troubled with nó distemper, my pulse beats free and even, my

sleep is quiet and refreshing; and from this bodily good habit results a constant serenity and calm of mind, that places me above the power of spleen or accident to discompose and ruffle. This account of myself is intended to shew my readers the happy effects of sobriety and moderation, without which it is impossible to enjoy what only a wise man would think worth living for, viz. a healthful body, and a contented easy mind.

I had writ thus far, and was meditating in my elbow chair on the monstrous folly of those who sacrifice health, fortune, reputation, reason, and oftentimes life itself, to luxury and riot; when, on a sudden, I was overcome with sleep, and dreamed as follows.-Methought I found myself in a magnificent and grand apartment: the floors were inlaid with various figures, the cielings finely painted, and the carved cornishes gilded over with the utmost expense and art. But all this seemed nothing, compared with the pictures of inestimable value, the beautiful tapestry, and stately looking-glasses, with an extravagance of gold, and velvet, and embroidery, of which the costly furniture was composed. I passed from room to room, adorned with equal but different magnificence, where innumerable wax candles, that hung in crystal branches,

diffused an artificial day: till, following a sound of voices, I entered one much larger than the rest, in the midst whereof about a dozen people of both sexes were seated round a table, covered with great variety of the choicest dainties. The company was so much engaged, that, without being taken notice of, I placed myself on a sofa in one corner of the room; and putting on my philosophic spectacles, which see through all disguises, began to make my observations. The master of the feast, to whom this sumptuous house belonged, sat at the bottom of the table, with a countenance full of mirth and gaiety but I soon perceived that it was all affected, and that he sighed inwardly with heaviness and discontent, nor found any relish in those delights he seemed to enjoy. Those at table with him were people he had not the least regard for; but, notwithstanding, frequently entertained in this expensive manner, through vanity and ostentation, to make himself be thought immensely rich; though at the same time I discovered, by looking a little closer, that his estate was deeply mortgaged, and he had taken up money even to defray the charges of this night's banquet. His guests, one and all, were rather amused than pleased: while with flattering speeches, and much ceremonious

complaisance, they indulged the pride of their entertainer, inwardly they despised and ridiculed his foolish extravagance; for, notwithstanding his great secrecy, every body knew he much outlived his income, and must soon become miserable and contemptible. The second course was just come in, which consisted of rarities purchased at vast prices, and so cooked up that I could not tell the name of any one dish some looked as if the cook, to save the teeth a trouble, had chewed the meat beforehand; and others seemed a complication of all tastes together, more like a vomit brought up from the stomach overcharged, than any thing designed for food. Upon examining the whole curiously, I perceived that all the elements had been ransacked to furnish out their respective delicates, which were thus artificially disguised. But I was most surprised at finding every sort of distemper incident to mankind concealed in one or other of the dishes, and all of them together mixed in some: here a fever was tossed up in a delicious fricassee; there, an apoplexy appeared in a high ragout; a pleurisy stood smoking at the upper end of the table, and a surfeit at the bottom: in one of the intermesses, head-ache was dressed out with rich perfumes and spices; and in another, mortal sick

ness lay covered over with marrow and strong gravy: cholic, jaundice, palsy, dropsy, spleen, and consumption, were placed against each other: scurvy in great abundance seasoned all the sauces; with everywhere a plenteous mixture of restlessness, discontent, pains, aches, and running sores. When the dessert came on, the same distempers again appeared in different forms, After which, the cloth was taken away, and the table covered with bottles of champaigne and burgundy; which my spectacles discovered to contain large quantities of the gout, stone, and rheumatism, together with seeds of many other diseases. Whilst I was considering the scene before me, the company, on a sudden, appeared more fit for an hospital than an entertainment: some roared out with agonies of pain; others seemed sick almost to death; some meagre, shrivelled, and decrepit; some puffed up like bladders; and some full of putrid sores and ulcers. The master of the feast himself was languid, pale, and helpless, fainting often, and like one expiring: when, immediately, a mixed multitude of poulterers, fishmongers, pastrycooks, confectioners, vintners, upholsterers, coach-makers, milliners, tailors, and tradesmen of all sorts, entered in a tumultuous manner, with much noise and clamour; and, seizing the

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