and, to prevent his knowing the house, I ordered Mrs Flora to bring him by the back-door into the garden. Vio. The very way which Felix comes! if they should meet, there would be fine work.-Indeed, my dear, I can't approve of your design. Enter FLORA. Flo. Madam, the colonel waits your pleasure. Vio. How durst you go upon such a message, mistress, without acquainting me? Flo. So! I am to be huffed for every thing! Isa. 'Tis too late to dispute that now, dear Violante; I acknowledge the rashness of the action-but consider the necessity of my deliver ance. Vio. That, indeed, is a weighty consideration : well, what am I to do? Col. Hang law in love affairs! thou shalt have right and title to it, out of pure inclination.—A matrimonial hint again! Gad! I fancy the women have a project on foot to transplant the union into Portugal! [Aside. Vio. Then you have an aversion to matrimony, colonel? Did you never see a woman in all your travels, that you could like for a wife? Col. A very odd question! Do you really expect that I should speak truth now? Vio. I do, if you expect to be dealt with, colonel. Col. Why, then-Yes. Vio. Is she in your country, or this? Col. This is a very pretty kind of a catechism! Col. Aye, how is she called, madam ? Isa. In the next room I'll give you instructions. In the mean time, Mrs Flora, shew the colonel into this. [Exit FLORA one way, and ISABELLA and dam, how is it you spell your name? VIOLANTE another. Re-enter FLORA with the COLONEL. Flo. The lady will wait on you presently, sir. Exit. Col. Very well-This is a very fruitful soil. I have not been here quite four-and-twenty hours, and I have three intrigues upon my hands already; but I hate the chase, without partaking of the game Enter VIOLANTE, veiled. Ha! a fine sized woman!-pray Heaven she proves handsome!—I am come to obey your ladyship's commands. Vio. Are you sure of that, colonel? Col. If you be not very unreasonable indeed, madam. A man is but a man. Col. Oh, ho! why, she is called-Pray, ma Vio. Oh, colonel, I am not the happy woman, nor do I wish it. Col. No! I'm sorry for that.-What the devil does she mean by all these questions? [Aside. Vio. Come, colonel, for once be sincere-perhaps you may not repent it. Col. This is like to be but a silly adventure, here's so much sincerity required. [Aside.]Faith, madam, I have an inclination to sincerity; but I'm afraid you'll call my manners in question. Vio. Not at all; I prefer truth before compliment in this affair. Col. Why, then, to be plain with you, madam, a lady last night wounded my heart by a fall from a window, whose person I could be content to take, as my father took my mother, till death do us part-but who she is, or how distinguished, whether maid, wife, or widow, I can't inform you; perhaps you are she. Vio. Not to keep you in suspense, I am not she-but I can give you an account of her. That lady is a maid of condition—has ten thousand pounds-and, if you are a single man, her person and fortune are at your service. [Takes her hand, and kisses it. Vio. Nay, we have no time for compliments, colonel. Col. I understand you, madam-Montrez moi Totre chambre. [Takes her in his arms. Vio. Nay, nay; hold, colonel; my bed-chamber is not be entered, without a certain purchase. Col. I accept the offer with the highest transCol. Purchase! humph, this is some kept inis-ports; but say, my charming angel! art thou not tress, I suppose, who industriously lets out her she? [Offers to embrace her.]—This is a lucky adleisure hours. Aside.]--Look ye, madam, you venture! must consider we soldiers are not overstocked with money-but we make ample satisfaction in love; we have a world of courage upon our hands now, you know--then, prithee use a conscience, and I'll try if my pocket can come up to your price. Vio. Nay, don't give yourself the trouble of drawing your purse, colonel; my design is levelled at your person, if that be at your own disposal. Col. Aye, that it is, faith, madam! and I'll settle it as firmly upon thee— Vio. As law can do it. Vio. Once, again, colonel, I tell you I am not she-but at six this evening you shall find her on the Terriero de Passa, with a white handkerchief in her hand. Get a priest ready, and you know the rest. Col. I shall infallibly observe your directions, madam, Enter FLORA hastily, and whispers VIOLANTE, who starts, and seems surprised. Vio. Ha! Felix crossing, say you? What shall I do now? Fel. I wonder where this dog of a servant is all this while-But she is at home, I find-How coldly she regards me!You look, Violante, as if the sight of me were troublesome to you. Vio. Can I do otherwise, when you have the assurance to approach me after what I saw today? Fel. Assurance! rather call it good-nature, after what I heard last night. But such regard to honour have I in my love to you, I cannot bear to be suspected, nor suffer you to entertain false notions of my truth, without endeavouring to convince you of my innocence-So much good-nature have I more than you, Violante.- Pray, give me leave to ask your woman one question: my man assures me she was the person you saw at my lodgings. Flo. I confess it, madam, and ask your pardon. Vio. Impudent baggage! not to undeceive me sooner what business could you have there? Fel. Lissardo and she, it seems, imitate you and I. Flo. I love to follow the example of my betters, madam. Fel. I hope I am justified— Vio. Since we are to part, Felix, there needs no justification. Fel. Methinks you talk of parting as a thing indifferent to you. Can you forget how I have loved? Vio. I wish I could forget my own passion, I should with less concern remember yours.-But for mistress Flora Fel. You must forgive her-Must, did I say? I fear I have no power to impose, though the injury was done to me. Vio. "Tis harder to pardon an injury done to what we love, than to ourselves; but, at your request, Felix, I do forgive her. Go watch my father, Flora, lest he should awake and surprise who feel it what wondrous magic lies in one kind look!— -One tender word destroys a lover's rage, and melts his fiercest passion into soft complaint. Oh, the window, Violante! wouldst thou but clear that one suspicion! Vio. Prithee, no more of that, my Felix; a little time shall bring thee perfect satisfaction. Fel. Well, Violante, on condition you think no more of a monastery, I'll wait with patience for this mighty secret. Vio. Ah, Felix! love generally gets the better of religion in us women. Resolutions, made in the heat of passion, ever dissolve upon reconciliation. Enter FLORA, hastily. Flo. Oh! madam, madam, madam! my lord, your father, has been in the garden, and locked the back-door, and comes muttering to himself this way. Vio. Then we are caught! Now, Felix, we are undone ! Fel. Heavens forbid! This is most unlucky! Let me step into your bed-chamber, he won't look under the bed; there I may conceal myself. [Runs to the door, and pushes it open a little.] Vio. My stars! if he goes in there, he'll find the colonel !-No, no, Felix, that's no safe place: my father often goes thither, and should you cough or sneeze, we are lost. Fel. Either my eye deceived me, or I saw a man within; I'll watch him close. Flo. Oh, invention, invention !-I have it, madam. Here, here, sir; off with your sword, and I'll fetch you a disguise. [Erit. Fel. She shall deal with the devil, if she conveys him out without my knowledge. Vio. Bless me, how I tremble! Enter FLORA, with a riding-hood. Flo. Here, sir, put on this. Fel. Ay, ay; any thing to avoid Don Pedro. [She puts it on. Vio. Oh, quick, quick! I shall die with apprehension. Flo. Be sure you don't speak a word. Fel. Not for the Indies-but I shall observe you closer than you imagine. [Aside. Ped. [Within.] Violante, where are you, child? Enter DON PEDRO. Why, how came the garden door open?-Ha! how now, who have we here? Vio. Humph!-he'll certainly discover him. [Aside. Flo. Tis my mother, an't please you, sir. [She and FELIX both curtsey. Ped. Your mother! by St Andrew, she's a strapper! why, you are a dwarf to her.How many children have you, good woman? Vio. Ob, if he speaks, we are lost! [Aside. [Aside. Flo. Oh, dear signior, she cannot hear you; she has been deaf these twenty years. Ped. Alas, poor woman!-Why, you muffle her up as if she were blind, too. Fel. Would I were fairly off! Ped. Turn up her hood." Vio. Undone for ever!bid! Oh, sir, she has the dreadfullest unlucky eyes- -Pray, don't look upon them; I made her keep her hood shut on purpose. Oh, oh, oh, oh! -St Anthony for Ped. Eyes!Why, what's the matter with her eyes? Flo. My poor mother, sir, is much afflicted with the colic; and, about two months ago, she had it grievously in her stomach, and was overpersuaded to take a dram of filthy English Geneva-which immediately flew up into her head, and caused such a defluxion in her eyes, that she could never since bear the day-light. Ped. Say you so?-Poor woman!- -Well, make her sit down, Violante, and give her a glass of wine. Vio. Let her daughter give her a glass below, sir:For my part, she has frighted me so, I shan't be myself these two hours—I am sure her eyes are evil eyes. Fel. Well hinted. Flo. I would tell him I had as good a right and title to the law of nature, and the end of the creation, as he had. Ped. You would, mistress! who the devil doubts it ?-A good assurance is a chambermaid's coat of arms, and lying and contriving the supporters.--Your inclinations are on tiptoe, it seems.-—— -If I were your father, housewife, I'd have a penance enjoined you so strict, that you should not be able to turn you in your bed for a month.-You are enough to spoil your lady, housewife, if she had not abundance of de votion. Vio. Fy, Flora! are you not ashamed to talk thus to my father?--You said, yesterday, you would be glad to go with me into the monastery, Flo. Did I! I told a great lie, then. Ped. She go with thee! no, no; she's enough to debauch the whole convent.-- -Well, child, remember what I said to thee: next week Vio. Ay; and what I am to do this, too. [Aside.] I am all obedience, sir; I care not how soon I change my condition. means. Flo. But little does he think what change she Aside. Ped. Well said, Violante !-I am glad to find her so willing to leave the world; but it is wholly owing to my prudent management. Did she Ped. Well, well; do so.- -Evil eyes! there know that she might command her fortune when are no evil eyes, child. she came at age, or upon day of marriage, perFlo. Come along, mother-[Speaks loud.]— haps she'd change her note.- -But I have al[Exeunt FELIX and FLORA. ways told her, that her grandfather left it with Vio. I'm glad he's gone. [Aside. this proviso, that she turned nun. Now, a small Ped. Hast thou heard the news, Violante? part of this twenty thousand pounds provides for Vio. What news, sir? her in the nunnery, and the rest is my own. Ped. Why, Vasquez tells me, that Don Lopez' There is nothing to be got in this life without podaughter, Isabella, is run away from her father!licy.-[Aside.]-Well, child, I am going into the that lord has very ill fortune with his children. country for two or three days, to settle some af-Well, I'm glad my daughter has no inclination fairs with thy uncle; and, when I return, we'll to mankind, that my house is plagued with no proceed for thy happiness, child.Good bye, suitors. [Aside. Violante; take care of thyself. Vio. This is the first word ever I heard of it! I pity her frailty [Exeunt DON PEDRO and VIOLANTE, Flo. So, now for the colonel!-Hist, hist, Ped. Well said, Violante.-Next week, I in- colonel! tend thy happiness shall begin. Enter FLORA. Vio. I don't intend to stay so long, thank you, papa. [Aside. Ped. My lady Abbess writes word she longs to see thee, and has provided every thing in order for thy reception. Thou wilt lead a happy life, my girl-fifty times before that of matrimony where an extravagant coxcomb might make a beggar of thee, or an ill-natured surly dog break thy heart. Flo. Break her heart! she had as good have her bones broke, as to be a nun; I am sure I had rather of the two. You are wondrous kind, sir: but, if I had such a father, I know what I would do. Ped. Why, what would you do, minx, ha? Enter COLONEL. Col. Is the coast clear? Flo. Yes, if you can climb; for you must get over the washhouse, and jump from the gardenwall into the street. Col. Nay, nay; I don't value my neck, if my incognita answers but thy lady's promise. [Exeunt CoL. and FLO. Enter FELIX. Fel. I have lain perdue under the stairs till I watched the old man out. [VIOLANTE opens the door.] 'Sdeath! I am prevented. [Exit FELIX. Enter VIOLANTE. Vio. Now to set my prisoner at liberty. [Goes 4 B to the door, where the colonel is hid.] Sir, sir, you may appear. Enter FELIX, following her. Fel. May he so, madam? I had cause for my suspicion, I find. Treacherous woman! Vio. Ha, Felix here! Nay, then, all is disco-vered. Fel. [Draws.] Villain! whoever thou art, come out, I charge thee, and take the reward of thy adulterous errand. Vio. What shall I say?—Nothing but the secret, which I have sworn to keep, can reconcile this quarrel. [Aside. Fel. A coward! Nay, then, I'll fetch you out; think not to hide thyself: no; by St Anthony, an 'altar should not protect thee; even there, I'd reach thy heart, though all the saints were armed in thy defence. [Exit FEL. Vio. Defend me, Heaven! what shall I do? I must discover Isabella, or here will be murder! Vio. Yes, trick! I knew you'd take the hint, and soon relapse into your wonted error. How easily your jealousy is fired! I shall have a blessed life with you. Fel. Was there nothing in it, then, but only to try me? Vio. Won't you believe your eyes? Fel. My eyes! No, nor my ears, nor any of my senses, for they have all deceived me.Well, I am convinced that faith is as necessary in love as in religion; for, the moment a man lets a woman know her conquest, he resigns his senses, and sees nothing but what she would have him. Vio. And as soon as that man finds his love returned, she becomes as errant a slave as if she had already said after the priest. Fel. The priest, Violante, would dissipate those fears which cause those quarrels. When wilt thou make me happy? Vio. To-morrow I will tell thee: my father is gone for two or three days to my uncle's; we have time enough to finish our affairs.-But, prithee leave me now, lest some accident should bring my father. Fel. To-morrow, then Fly swift, ye hours, and bring to-morrow on! Fel. Oh, rapturous sounds! Charming wo- Thy words and looks have filled my heart move, And all to come be confidence and love. [Exit FEL. Enter ISABElla. Isa. I am glad my brother and you are reconciled, my dear; and the colonel escaped without his knowledge; I was frighted out of my wits when I heard him return. I know not how to express my thanks, woman, for what you suffered for my sake; my grateful acknowledgement shall ever wait you, and to the world proclaim the faith, truth, and honour of a woman. Vio. Prithee, don't compliment thy friend, Isabella. You heard the colonel, I suppose? Isa. Every syllable; and am pleased to find I do not love in vain. Vio. Thou has caught his heart, it seems, and an hour hence may secure his person. Thou hast made hasty work on't, girl. Isa. From thence I draw my happiness; we shall have no accounts to make up, after consummation. She who for years protracts her lover's pain, To be his wife, when late she gives consent, [Exeunt. SCENE L-FREDERICK'S house. Enter FELIX and FREDERICK. ACT V. Fel. This hour has been propitious; I am reConciled to Violante, and you assure me Antonio is out of danger. Fred. Your satisfaction is doubly mine. Enter LISSARDO. Fel. What haste you made, sirrah, to bring me word if Violante went home! Lis. I can give you very good reasons for my stay, sir. Yes, sir, she went home. Fred. Oh! your master knows that, for he has been there himself, Lissardo. Lis. Sir, may I beg the favour of your ear? Fel. What have you to say? [Whispers, and FELIX seems uneasy. Fred. Ha! Felix changes colour at Lissardo's news! What can it be? Fel. A Scots footman, that belongs to colonel Briton, an acquaintance of Frederick's, say you? The devil! if she be false, by Heaven I'll trace her. Prithee, Frederick, do you know one colonel Briton, a Scotsman ? Fred. Yes; why do you ask me? Fel. Nay, no great matter; but my man tells me that he has had some little differences with a servant of his, that's all. Colonel, I began to think I had lost you. Col. And not without some reason, if you knew all. Fel. There's no danger of a fine gentleman's being lost in this town, sir. Col. That compliment don't belong to me, sir; but, I assure you, I have been very near being run away with. Fred. Who attempted it? Col. Faith, I know not-only, that she is a charming woman; I mean as much as I saw of her. Fel. My heart swells with apprehensionsome accidental encounter? Fred. A tavern, I suppose, adjusted the mat ter? Col. A tavern! no, no, sir; she's above that rank, I assure you; this nymph sleeps in a velvet bed, and lodgings every way agreeable. Fel. Ha! a velvet bed! I thought you said but now, sir, you knew her not. Col. No more I don't, sir. Fel. How came you, then, so well acquainted with her bed? Fred. Aye, aye, come, come, unfold. Col. Why, then, you must know, gentlemen, that I was conveyed to her lodgings by one of Cupid's emissaries, called a chambermaid, in a chair, through fifty blind alleys, who, by the help of a key, let me into a garden. Fel. "'Sdeath! a garden! this must be Violante's garden. [Aside. Col. From thence conducted me into a spacious room, then dropt me a curtsey; told me her lady would wait on me presently; so, without unveiling, modestly withdrew. Fel. Damn her modesty! this was Flora. Fred. Well, how then, colonel? [Aside. Col. Then, sir, immediately from another door issued forth a lady, armed at both eyes, from whence such showers of darts fell around me, that had I not been covered with the shield of another beauty, I had infallibly fallen a martyr to her charms; for, you must know, I just saw her eyes-Eyes! did I say? no, no, hold; I saw but one eye, though I suppose it had a fellow equally as killing. Fel. But how came you to see her bed, sir?'Sdeath! this expectation gives a thousand racks. [Aside. Col. Why, upon her maid's giving notice her father was coming, she thrust me into the bedchamber. Fel. Upon her father's coming! Col. Aye, so she said; but putting my ear to the key-hole of the door, I found it was another lover. Fel. Confound the jilt! 'twas she without dispute. [Aside. Fred. Ah, poor colonel! Ha, ha, ha! Col. I discovered they had had a quarrel, but whether they were reconciled or not I can't tell; for the second alarm brought her father in good earnest, and had like to have made the gentleman and I acquainted, but she found some other stratagem to convey him out. Fel. Contagion seize her, and make her body ugly as her soul! There is nothing left to doubt of now-'Tis plain 'twas she. Sure he knows me, and takes this method to insult me. 'Sdeath! I cannot bear it. [Aside. Fred. So, when she had dispatched her old lover, she paid you a visit in her bed-chamber— ha! colonel? |